Saturday, November 17, 2007

Grendel's mom has got it goin' on

The family that lived next door to my boyhood home in Crestwood had a cat named Beowulf. That ancient memory came to light when my son said he wanted to see the new movie "Beowulf" to get some extra credit for his English class.

The film is available in regular or 3D. Even though it cost extra, we opted for the 3D version. The 3D technology comes from a company called RealD. Entertainment Weekly said that the glasses they give you are more like the sunglasses Tom Cruise wore in "Risky Business" than the old school paper framed red and blue glasses. I thought they were a little less Tom Cruise and a little more Drew Carey.

The last two previews before the feature were also in 3D. One was for "Coraline." The other was for a remake of "Journey to the Center of the Earth." Once you commit to a 3D screening, you have to keep the glasses on. Without them, the picture is blurry.

The characters are created with motion capture computer animation. The technology has improved a lot since it was used in "The Polar Express." The faces move realistically but, as my wife pointed out, the eyes still seem lifeless. I thought the movie got better as it went along, mostly because I didn't care for the way they designed Grendel. His speech, provided by Crispin Glover, was hard to decipher. The movie builds up to a spectacular fight scene between Beowulf and a dragon.

If the movie had come out a few weeks earlier, Jimmy Kimmel could have dressed his father in chain mail and included him in this year's "Half and Half Halloween Pageant." Mr. Kimmel would be perfect as Beowulf Blitzer.

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1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Grendel's Mom

Grendel's Mom has got it painted on.
Grendel's Mom has got it painted on.
Grendel's Mom has got it painted on.
Grendel's Mom has got it painted on.

Grendel, now I know why you drool (why you drool)
Why you live in a cave by the p-p-p-pool (by the pool)
'Cause your mom rubs you down with her tail (with her tail)
Which is why I'm stripping off my chain mail (my chain mail)
You know I'm not as heroic as I used to be
But I'm feeling pretty kingly, can't you see?

Grendel's Mom has got it painted on
She's all I want and I've waited for so long.
Grendel, you're a beast but your Mom is quite a feast.
Now I know it might be wrong
But I'm in love with Grendel's Mom.

Grendel's Mom has got it painted on.
Grendel's Mom has got it painted on.

Grendel, thanks to me you're dead and gone (dead and gone)
But your Mom emerged with just some gold paint on (gold paint on)
I could tell she understood the way I felt (the way I felt)
'Cause her dripping body caused my sword to melt (sword to melt)
Now it's not a hot medieval fantasy
Since Hrothgar's old, your mom could use a man like me.

Grendel's Mom has got it painted on.
She's all I want and I've waited for so long.
Grendel, you're a beast but your Mom is quite a feast.
Now I know it might be wrong
But I'm in love with Grendel's Mom.

Grendel's Mom has got it painted on (Her dress is painted on)
She's all I want and I've waited for so long (mated and sated)
Wealthow, she promised me, would be the Queen for me.
I know it might be wrong
But I'm in love with Grendel's Mom.
Oh oh oh oh (I'm in love with)
I'm in love with Grendel's Mom
Oh oh oh oh (making dragons)
Grendel, you're a beast but your Mom is quite a feast.
I know it might be wrong
But I'm in love with Grendel's Mom.

© 2007 Larry McAneny

11/19/2007  

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