on fire!

David Letterman and Jay Leno get all the attention but the best gig in television may actually belong to Regis Philbin. The hours aren't bad and he gets to work with a great co-host, Kelly Ripa. Philbin was born a year before my father and has been on the air since since before I was born. Like my parents, he is from The Bronx. In fact, he went to the same high school as two of my uncles.

This morning I got to live out a little bit of my Regis fantasy right here in Knoxville. Two months ago when I was a guest on "Eleven O'clock Rock," the producers at Knoxivi told me that co-host Brent Thompson would be taking a few days off when his wife delivered their baby. They offered me the opportunity to fill in as one of their guest co-hosts. I got the call last week that today would be the day.

It was an absolute pleasure to work with Lauren Lazarus, who made things very easy for me. She was willing to go along with my idea for a cold open that referenced couple of yesterday's Super Bowl ads, especially the commercial for Snickers.



The show streams live each weekday at 11:00 a.m. To view today's episode in the archives, go to http://knoxivi.com/eleven/ and click on Monday and then on 02/08/2010. You can also get information about the show on Facebook and Twitter.

The musical guest was Davis Mitchell from the band Dishwater Blonde. He performed some of his solo material, which had a nice Christian feel to it. Mitchell is a music minister at Knoxlife Church, which usually meets at Remedy Coffee in the Old City.

During the show, I got to interview Jeff Joslin, who directed the movie I was in last year. We talked about how Jeff got "Fish Bait" off the ground and how he is writing a sequel. Before the show ended, Jeff texted me and offered up a special link for viewers to buy the DVD and soundtrack for only ten bucks.



Jeff told me that he and his New York-based pals plan to make another spoof music video soon. He recently posted an amusing parody of Jordin Sparks' "No Air" on YouTube. It's about a follically challenged man and it's called (you guessed it) "No Hair."

laugh factory

On the trip to bring him back to school, one of the many things my son and I talked about was my blog entry about "Ed Gein: The Musical." I was pleased that the film's producers had seen my post and left a comment. They liked my idea for a parody song called "You: Suede Shoes."

I explained to my son that I didn't feel particularly funny when I was writing that post. Most of it was fairly standard but I thought it needed some jokes to close it out. Since comedy comes in threes, all I had to do was make up three quick punchlines. To do so, I used a comedy technique that I call "one from column A and one from column B."

In this case, column A would be a list of easily recognizable Elvis songs. I've been to Graceland and worked at an oldies station, so I knew plenty. If I didn't, a list is only a click away at Wikipedia. Column B would be anything Gein-related, like body parts or heinous crimes. Then it's just a matter of finding matches.

I suspect that certain movie companies in the San Fernando Valley use the same basic concept to name their movies. Last month, I used it to make up a bunch of "Avatar" jokes on Twitter.

to blog or not to blog

Have Twitter and Facebook taken the spotlight away from blogs? My friend Bean, for example, gave up his blog in favor of Twitter. However, several blog writers use Facebook or Twitter as a way to disseminate links to their latest blog entries.

Once again, the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra has a nice treat for those of us who have stood by our blogs. They are offering a pair of tickets to their "Shakespeare in Love" concert on Thursday, February 25th in exchange for a blog entry about the experience. Tweets and Facebook status updates don't count. To qualify, blogs must be public and must be updated at least once a month.

The program promises to be a fun one to write about. It features actors from the Clarence Brown Theatre reciting lines from "A Midsummer Night's Dream" as the orchestra plays Mendelssohn’s work. Women from the Knoxville Chamber Chorale will sing during that piece as well.

Even those with very little exposure to classical music will recognize parts of the "Romeo and Juliet Fantasy Overture" by Tchaikovsky. I remember it from a TV commercial for a record album that ran repeatedly on New York television when I was young.

Bloggers who feel they are up to the challenge can contact Stephanie Burdette with the URL to their blog. It would also be nice if you share the link to this post with your friends who might be interested. You can go ahead and use Twitter or Facebook for that.

jailhouse rock

Not everyone has a wife as understanding as mine. I briefly mentioned that one of the Christmas gifts she gave me was a book about killers called "Human Monsters" by David Everitt. One of the six evildoers whose pictures were chosen for the cover was Ed Gein, who is credited as being the inspiration for the character of Norman Bates in "Psycho." Each nutjob gets about two or three pages in the book. The brief chapter on Gein alludes to the psychological damage inflicted on him by his mother. However Gein's crimes were more reminiscent of Jame Gumb in "Silence of the Lambs."

As I write this, my wife is at a Knoxville Choral Society rehearsal. She also sings with the choir at All Saints Church. In high school, she played Laurey in the student production of "Oklahoma!" I bring up her interest in music because of a news story out of Menasha, Wisconsin. The small town was the location of the debut screenings of "Ed Gein: The Musical." According to the follow-up article, the songs are parodies of well-known tunes. For example, "All Cooked Up" is a spoof of "All Shook Up."

I wonder if there are some Elvis songs they could use in a sequel. It would be great to hear "Love Me Tenderized," "Good Luck Arm" and "You: Suede Shoes."

but wait, there's more

The goal I set for myself last night was to figure out how to get WINC and WVMP on my new WiFi clock radio. I located both their streams online and added them to "My Streams" at Reciva.com. Just before climbing into bed this afternoon for my nap, I saw that a new menu item had been added to my radio but neither station connected. I will keep trying.

The good news is that the results of my other experiments did work. Included in the new menu item called "My Stuff" were "My Stations," "My Podcasts," and "My MP3tunes." Since the eight stations I put on my preset buttons aren't enough when the whole world wide web is available, I now have a menu with some stations I'm interested in occasionally sampling like KIIS, KFI, WMAL, WWVQ and WXMX.

Registering the radio gave me a free membership at a site called MP3tunes.com. It offers a "music locker" where I can upload my own files from anywhere and then listen to them on my clock radio. I uploaded a bunch of Christmas songs and Frank Jr.'s version of "A Visit from St. Nicholas." I'm not ready for the season to be over yet, which is good because I will be the narrator for the Christmas Cantata at All Saints Church this weekend.

So far my favorite feature has to be "My Podcasts." I was too excited to sleep, so until I drifted off, I listened to the latest podcasts from Kevin & Bean, Fr. Gary Braun and Coverville. The latter was a countdown of their top ten cover songs. A country version of "Gin & Juice" (NSFW) was outstanding.

tenth or eleventh day of Christmas

The new clock radio I wanted for Christmas passed its first test this morning. It turned on at 4:30 a.m. and began playing WTOP. Or more accurately, wtop.com. The great gift from my wife receives both local FM stations and Internet streams.

The Sanyo R227 has eight presets for FM and eight presets for WiFi. I had a hard time finding eight local stations I liked enough to fill all the presets. I'm having the opposite problem narrowing down the thousands of Internet stations to pick my top eight.

For starters, I have programmed four news stations and four music stations. The news stations will stay on my buttons as long as their programming during the 4:00 a.m. ET hour interests me. I picked a station in each of the three cities where I've lived and one in St. Louis since I visit there often. They are WTOP, KNX, WINS and KMOX.

The music stations were a little easier to choose. I went with KROQ, KCRW and WLNG. The owner's manual says I can register my new toy at Reciva.com. By doing so, I can add stations to my device. I joined the site tonight and requested WINC, where my friend Paula works, as well as 101.5 The Music Place, where my friend Sarah works.

Since neither WINC nor The Music Place were on the list of stations already in the radio, I have temporarily assigned the last button to an Internet-only stream called "Christmas Vinyl." After all, the Christmas season runs through Sunday at my church.

need to venti

As a coffee novice, I was surprised and a tad disillusioned by what my daughter told me. We were sitting in a booth in the Market Square storefront shared by Knoxivi and The Lunchbox after watching Internet sensation Julia Nunes perform on Eleven o'Clock Rock. You might recall me mentioning her appearance three weeks ago. I borrowed my daughter's camera to grab a picture while Julia was singing.



My daughter bought herself a coffee, which came with one of those cardboard wraparounds that had the Seattle's Best Coffee logo on it. While it's old news to most people, I had no idea that Seattle's Best is owned by Starbucks. It seemed weird to me that Starbucks didn't change their subsidiary's name to "Seattle's Second Best Coffee." When my wife and son asked why I looked so confused, I said it was like finding out that Coke owned Pepsi or that McDonald's owned Burger King.

So if Seattle's Best is not a competitor of Starbucks, who does truly compete with the coffee giant on a national scale? The best my family and I could come up with was Panera Bread and Dunkin' Donuts. I remember a place in L.A. called The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf but it's not national. My son said there's a place called Kaldi's in Missouri and my daughter mentioned a joint called Caribou Coffee, which has stores in 16 states. Where do you like to get your caffeine?

Meanwhile, my free coffee quest continues. I scored freebies from Starbucks and from Seattle's Best this fall. Tonight I got a coupon for a free cup at Pilot just by becoming their fan on Facebook. Hey Weigel's, couldn't you do the same thing on your page?

cold turkey

After playing holiday music for the last month, or in some cases two months, the all-Christmas radio stations across America will cut us off tonight. For one station in Knoxville, it's a good thing. For another, it's too soon for me. I even went so far as to suggest via Facebook that Love 89 keep Christmas hymns on the air for another twelve days, mixed in with their regular playlist. It might keep more seasonal listeners around for their "30 Day Challenge."

For Catholics like me, Advent, the season of anticipation, ended yesterday. The Christmas season started last night and runs until the celebration of the Baptism of the Lord. When the choir at All Saints Church wanted to repeat last year's Christmas Cantata during Advent, our pastor said no, it had to be during the Christmas season. You can come hear it for free on January 8 at 7:30 p.m. and January 10 at 2:30 p.m.

Love 89 normally plays Christian light rock. During Advent, they mix in a lot of secular tunes by Christian artists, which is how I discovered that I loved "Sleigh Ride" by Relient K and "Jingle Bells" by Denver & the Mile High Orchestra. Starting tomorrow those secular songs will get a rest until next year. I wish Love 89 would continue playing their versions of some traditional carols like a new favorite I heard for the first time this year, "O Holy Night" by Point of Grace.

Nationwide, Christmas airplay is dominated by non-religious songs. It's been that way for years. The list that ASCAP releases annually changes very little from year to year. The only religious entry on list of the top holiday songs of the decade is "Little Drummer Boy."

My love of Christmas music is connected to my enjoyment of cover songs. It's fantastic to hear an artist improve upon a previous recording. Even "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" can be re-done brilliantly, as it was by Poe. The Brian Setzer Orchestra regularly updates Christmas classics. The one good cover song I "discovered" on our local commercial holiday station this year was "Feliz Navidad" by Jon Secada. Yes, Mr. Deejay, that was me calling on the request line to ask for the artist's name.

Unfortunately, cover songs can also go horribly wrong. One of my favorite songs, "Baby It's Cold Outside" was ruined by the clash of Rod Stewart and Dolly Parton's voices. Porky Pig's version of "Blue Christmas" might be funny once but it does not hold up to repeated airplay. Because of the atrocious lyrics, I doubt any artist could salvage "The Christmas Shoes." Only Patton Oswalt's hysterical but very R-rated deconstruction is worth a listen.

let's go to the pearly gates

George Michael was George Michael before the Wham! guy came along. Like the singer, the George Michael I knew had a real last name that wasn't radio-friendly. Because I remember how mad he got when The Washington Post printed it, I will respect his memory and omit it here.

George died today after a two-year battle with leukemia. He was one of the best deejays ever to grace the airwaves, most notably at WFIL. I remember hearing him at WABC when I was in high school. He was also the best local sportscaster I've ever seen. I'm not talking about play-by-play or color commentators, I mean the guys in the trenches squeezing as many highlights as possible into their allotted time on the evening news.

George moved to the Washington area a month or so before I did. For me, he always was the face of sports in the nation's capital. His enthusiasm is also partly responsible for my conversion to being a Redskins fan. My friends who interned at WRC confirmed all reports that George was a tough but fair boss. His off-air perfectionism is what allowed him to seem relaxed on the air.

My first full-time job in broadcasting was at WAVA. Our general manager, Alan Goodman, knew a good thing when he saw it and signed George to provide sports reports three times a week during the morning show. It was my job to call George and tell him that we were ready for his segment. He had a microphone in his house that was connected to our studios via a dedicated phone line.

Once a year, I think around Thanksgiving or Christmas, George would come in and play deejay. We would toss our morning zoo format and play oldies not normally heard on WAVA. And by we, I mean George and me. Unlike most deejays, George did not run his own board. He was major-market all the way and was accustomed to having a board op. I would load up the tunes and wait for George to point at me to hit the button. He had a hand signal for me to turn on his mic and another to start the next record. I'm using the old-school term but I actually played his oldies off CD.

There was one particular song that George insisted on playing every time. He would call me a couple of times in the days leading up to his appearance to make sure that I would have "Come and Get Your Love" by Redbone. Excuse me for a moment while I listen to the intro that George loved talking up.

Come and Get Your Love - Redbo...

WRC-TV has posted a retrospective, much of which was also shown when George retired from his nightly duties in 2007. I found several other good links on the @redskinsblog Twitter feed. As you gather with your family this Christmas Eve, take a moment to say a prayer for the repose of the soul of George Michael. Rest in peace sir, rest in peace.

sync or swim

The technological challenge of presenting the Living Christmas Tree in a basketball arena is mind-boggling. I was impressed with the professional caliber of the performance. It's as good a show as you would expect to see at a theater in Nashville or a theme park in Orlando. Was it too good to be true?

As I watched the program yesterday, I wondered where they placed the microphones for all the singers in the enormous, tree-shaped riser. Some of the soloists had flesh-colored headset mics on their cheeks. I thought about how many wireless channels it would take to collect the sound from the hundreds of cast members.



My suspicions were confirmed today by someone who attended the matinee performance on Sunday. She has a friend who played in the sizable live orchestra. The friend told her that the acoustics of Thompson-Boling Arena would make it impossible for all the musicians and singers to play and sing together. The distance between the orchestra pit and the singers in the tree would create an audio delay. As a result, the musicians and most of the singers pre-record their parts in October. A few of the soloists sing live with the recorded track. The rest of the singers and musicians aren't just mouthing the words or playing air guitar. They do actually sing along and play along with themselves but without microphones.

Armed with this information, am I surprised? A little. Am I disappointed? No. Do I regret going to the show last year or this year? No. Will I go again next year? Absolutely.

under (-utilized) the tree

Christmas is the second most important celebration in Christianity. The annual Living Christmas Tree performance recognized that fact as their nativity pageant turned into a passion play. I had a great time at last year's show and was anxious to see it again.

Imagine that your church decided to put on a nativity pageant and that it grew in popularity over time. It relocated from the church to a theater that still wasn't big enough. Eventually it found a home at a large basketball arena. The demand for tickets is so great that five shows are scheduled each year. That's what happened at Sevier Heights Baptist Church, which works all year to prepare for their annual festivities at Thompson-Boling Arena.



The show started with a series of songs that would fit right in on a secular all-Christmas radio station. A huge group of kids sang about toys and Santa sang that he was "back in town." They segued quickly into a reenactment of the first Christmas. My son wondered how they chose the real baby who played Jesus. Rehearsals for the Living Christmas Tree begin each July. They must put out a casting call for pregnant women who are due around Thanksgiving.



The story didn't stop with the infant Jesus. It picked up with John the Baptist (duh) who sang a solo before he immersed Jesus in a pool of real water. Jesus cast out demons, cured a blind girl and raised another girl from the dead during an upbeat musical number. During the Last Supper, they sang "I Am the Bread of Life," which I recognized from the Catholic hymnals. It was a little odd to see the giant Christmas tree as the backdrop for scenes of the crucifixion and the resurrection.



There is one more performance of this year's Living Christmas Tree. In addition to everything I've mentioned, there is also a good sermon from evangelist Jose Zayas. The only thing I don't understand is why they ask people to leave the arena for one-on-one counseling before the much-hyped grand finale featuring the Hallelujah Chorus. As usual, the audience stood.

once bitten and twice shy

Playing Christmas music on the radio is still a thrill for me. It might be different if I worked at one of those all-Christmas stations but I have only worked at places that mix in holiday tunes with the regular format.

I loaded three new Christmas songs into the system the other day, one at the request of my boss and two of my own picks. I had downloaded Lady Gaga's "Christmas Tree" while it was available for free on Amazon.com. I got a copy of SpongeBob SquarePants' "Don't Be a Jerk (It's Christmas)" in the mail from a publicist. My boss added both to his holiday playlist.

The new song that came across his desk was "Last Christmas" by the cast of "Glee." The Wham tune has been covered by hundreds of artists in the past few years. I put the "Glee" version in the system and got a chance to play it on the air this weekend. As I talked over the intro, I realized it reminded me of an older, equally campy song. Listen to the beginning of "Last Christmas" and then compare it to an excerpt of "White Christmas" by the Partridge Family.

to light and guard

One of the best Christmas traditions in East Tennessee is the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra's 23rd Annual Clayton Holiday Concerts at the Knoxville Civic Auditorium. My wife sings with the Knoxville Choral Society, which is featured in 12 of the 16 numbers on this year's program. There are four performances, the first of which was tonight.

Aside from my obvious bias toward the KCS, the star of the show each year is Santa Claus, who has one of the finest baritone voices you'll ever hear. He sings a couple of songs about angels, including "An Angel Gets Its Wings," which is inspired by Zuzu's famous line from "It's a Wonderful Life." The Sound Company Children's Choir and the Appalachian Ballet Company also performed during some of the songs.

One of the Symphony's musicians writes a blog about their concerts. She wrote about how it's the best week of the season and gave some behind the scenes reports from the rehearsals this past week.

The audience oohed and aahed during a slide show of dogs, cats and rabbits available for adoption from the Young-Williams Animal Center. My contact at the KSO, Stephanie Burdette, got a nice shout out from the Maestro for the work she did compiling a slide show of angel drawings by local schoolkids.

My wife drove herself to the concert while I waited for our son to arrive home from college. He and I left the house less than five minutes after he arrived. We used the pair of press tickets I had obtained. After intermission, my son asked why we all stood during the "Hallelujah Chorus." I explained that there was no good reason except perhaps that King George once needed to stretch his legs.

hear the angels' voices

Logan Murrell's performance of "I'll Be Home for Christmas" wowed me and everyone else at the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra's Clayton Holiday Concert three years ago. I wrote a blog post about it in which I predicted that Logan will someday be as famous as Leann Rimes. Her rendition of "O Holy Night" was fairly spectacular too.



About two months ago I received an email from Julie Murrell, Logan's mother. She said that a family member had discovered my blog post and shared it with Logan. Our conversation continued a month later when I met the Murrells at the March of Dimes Celebrity Chefs Auction. She said it was one thing for grandparents and relatives to praise Logan but even better to receive positive feedback from an outsider like me.



Julie had also read on my blog that I am a fan of Christmas music. She thought I might enjoy Logan's Christmas album. She gave me a copy, which I put in my car's CD player.

A week or so ago, I was talking about Christmas music with the program director of the country station in the cluster where I work. I had noticed that he's been playing Taylor Swift's cover of "Last Christmas." As the conversation progressed, I mentioned Logan Murrell and he remembered seeing her perform at the March of Dimes event. I retrieved her CD from my car and skimmed through the tracks with him. His programming "ears" perked up when we got to "I'll Be Home for Christmas." He agreed with me that it was hard to believe Logan was only 11 when she recorded the album. The good news is that he plans to give the song some airplay. Even though I don't normally listen to country music, I plan on tuning in to Q93 with the hope of hearing Logan on the radio.

like you fairly well

KROQ has its annual Almost Acoustic Christmas shows this weekend. One year I was responsible for booking an unusual artist to perform at the concert. Wesley Willis had appeared on the Kevin & Bean show a few times. He was an imposing figure -- big and tall with a knot on his forehead from butting heads with everyone he met. I remember one morning when Natalie Merchant bravely accepted a head butt after her interview ended. Wesley also wrote songs about almost everyone he met, including yours truly.



A couple of recent entries on the Mental Floss blog brought Wesley to mind this week. The first one had some background on him and links to several old YouTube videos. The second had news of a new DVD documentary about the outsider musician called "Wesley Willis's Joy Rides." Here's the trailer:

rocked k-town

The Brian Setzer Orchestra opened their show at the Tennessee Theatre last night with the theme from "Batman." I was in heaven as my favorite band played the music from my favorite TV show.



The musicians always do a great job. They might have been even more "on" than usual because the show was being filmed for BillboardLive. It will be streamed on Christmas Eve and repeated at some point in the future. At this point, the site has conflicting information about the time of the webcast. It will either start at 8:00 or 10:00 p.m. EST. After I thanked them profusely for the tickets, the guys from Surfdog Records told me that the concert could possibly be sold as a DVD too. I would buy one even though I already have a previous holiday disc of theirs.

State Street behind the theatre was closed to accommodate the TV truck. Fortunately my wife read about the closure on Twitter, which saved us some time and trouble on our way to the parking garage. Knoxville must be a great place to film a special. Ralphie May, among others, have used the Tennessee Theatre for the same purpose. Because of the proximity of Scripps Networks and the independent production companies that create programming for them, high-quality crew members are readily available. The cameraman focusing on Setzer from stage left was D.J. Corcoran, who was my classmate in the FBI Citizens Academy. He was part of the crew that once filmed an episode of "Ed the Plumber" at my house.

The set list mixed Setzer favorites with holiday classics. A costumed Grinch made an appearance as the band mashed "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch" into the "Stray Cat Strut." I don't know if Brian really needs the sheet music for "The Nutcracker Suite" or if the roadies put it out there for a visual effect. I suspect he was actually reading the notes because he looked like a kid at his Christmas recital. The Orchestra's cover of "Angels We Have Heard On High" is one of my favorite versions of the hymn.

No Setzer show is complete without "Rock This Town." Even though I've seen their trick before, I love it every time. In the middle of the concert, Brian gives the horns a break and plays a set of tunes with just the drummer and stand-up bass player. It's obviously a nod to the Stray Cats. The last song the trio does is "Rock This Town." Before it ends, the scrim rises and the horn section kicks in to finish the tune big-band style. At the end of the show, real snow (or real shaved ice) fell on us as the band played "Jingle Bells."

little lambs

The Black Eyed Peas stopped midway through their performance of "I Gotta Feeling" during the Grammy nominations special a week or so ago. They asked viewers to send in videos of themselves lip-syncing the hit song. I thought to myself "eh... Julia Nunes already did that."

The ukulele-playing Internet sweetheart did, in fact, produce a music video for her song "Binoculars" using clips sent in by viewers. Julia is back on my radar because she will return to Knoxville on December 30th. I'm planning a trip to knoxivi at 11:00 a.m. that day to see her sing and be interviewed for "Eleven o'clock Rock." She'll be in town to appear on this month's "Tennessee Shines" show also on December 30th.



Earlier this year, my wife and I saw Julia perform across Market Square during a Blue Plate Special broadcast from The Square Room. We learned about her appearance from our friend Richard Cheese who had booked Julia as his opening act for some gigs in New York City.

While we're on the topic of Eleven o'clock Rock, look for me on the show this coming Monday. They are going to interview me about Einstein Simplified's upcoming performance at First Night Knoxville. I'm debating whether or not to stay downtown a little longer for a 1:00 p.m. showing of "White Christmas" at the Tennessee Theatre. Tickets are required but they are free and available from Rose Mortuary. Anyone want to go with me?

guitar & bass

It's as if Christmas is coming a little early for me this year. Next week I get to spend consecutive evenings watching two men I admire greatly, one for his science and one for his art.

The Bone Zones team that organizes Jefferson Bass events has invited me aboard the book signing cruise with Dr. Bill Bass on the Volunteer Princess Monday night. Last month they asked me to help publicize the boat trip, which will raise money for the Dr. William M. Bass Building Fund. Dr. Bass will show some of his famous Body Farm slides while dinner is served.

I plan to ask Dr. Bass about an email I received last week. The mother of a UT anthropology student wrote to suggest that I could volunteer to process skeletal remains on campus.

For four months I have been anticipating the arrival of the Brian Setzer Orchestra in Knoxville. On Tuesday they will rock the rafters of the historic Tennessee Theatre. My wife and I have been invited to attend by the management of Surfdog Records. The opening act will be Ross Bon & the Mighty Blue Kings. Based on the few songs I've heard online, they should be pretty good.

My blog post last August even surprised the Tennessee Theatre people, who had not yet made their own Setzer announcement. However they didn't notice last month when I inadvertently scooped the local paper with news of David Keith's upcoming musical performance.

Will you be attending either the forensics cruise or the Christmas concert? I am making arrangements to borrow a camera long term from a reader who works at knoxivi.com. If I can't get it in time, I may ask you to take a picture of me while you're there.

felix sit annus novus

Fr. Ragan Schriver received a birthday gift from his new congregation at Holy Family Catholic Church last night. They gave him a set of what they called "pastor vestments." The purple chasuble and stole were similar to the ones he wore to celebrate the first Mass of Advent, but the new ones were adorned with the Chi Rho symbol that looks like PX to us. I took a blurry picture with my phone.



Cantor Karen Burry could barely contain her excitement about the gift. The presentation would occur at the end of Mass. She told my wife about it as soon as we walked in the door of the church. Karen, like my wife, is one of the better cantors in the diocese. I recognized her from some RCIA ceremonies at Sacred Heart Cathedral.

There was no organist at Mass last night but there was music. I noticed that Karen carried a remote control to the ambo before the processional hymn. When she hit the button, the organ played a song that the previous pastor had recorded onto a floppy disk. Karen sang some parts of the Mass a cappella and changed disks for the offertory, communion and recessional hymns. The Holy Holy Holy, the Memorial Acclamation and the Great Amen were all sung to the tune of "O Come O Come Emmanuel."

The Byzantine items and iconography that I wrote about in August have been removed from the sanctuary. Fr. Ragan was able to get an ever-so-slightly damaged statue set of the Holy Family at a great discount from the Paraclete. He said that one of Mary's fingers was broken off but stared blankly when I said "just like Daryl Hannah."

Next weekend Fr. Ragan will concelebrate all the Masses at All Saints. Following the 11:45 service, I will emcee a roast in the parish hall. All are welcome.

acid redux

For several years, I have enjoyed trashing CBS' attempted coverage of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. I assume the only reason they bother doing a telecast is so they can sell ads to Macy's competitors. The parade participants don't perform for the CBS cameras like they do for NBC's.

I could only tolerate a few minutes of the CBS broadcast this year. I knew it would be bad when Maggie Rodriguez started off by referring to the new Spider-Man balloon as Superman. Really. Instead of watching the whole thing I did a Google search for "CBS Thanksgiving parade" followed by words like "awful" and "terrible." One of the searches brought me to the comments posted on CBSnews.com. Let me copy and paste a few for posterity in case Les Moonves deletes them.

by ayearwasted: CBS's supposed Macy's Parade coverage is merely celebrity snaps and gab. The token camera shots of the parade are so distant as to appear like an ant farm, and even those token images are blocked by a cheap computer overlay of fall leaves. Clearly CBS has no respect for the thousands of people who created the floats, no respect for those who practiced for years to march and perform, and no respect for we who do appreciate their extraordinary accomplishments. Shame, shame, shame!

by Alliterated: Disappointing coverage of the Macy's parade was highlighted by -not the parade- but a bunch of commercials and dance routines. Disgusting appearance by an alleged comedian, who denigrated his mother and father with references to his father looking like Hugh Hefner. Your rush to catch up with the crudeness of cable is alienating scores of boomers who still control the remotes, the majority of the buying power and so also the commercial dollars.

by tsummer99: We must say that this is the WORST coverage of a Thanksgiving Day parade we have ever seen. In fact, we don't think we are even watching a parade but in fact watching the hosts chat it up and commercials. COMMERCIALS EVERY FEW MINUTES IT SEEMS. We want to see a HOLIDAY PARADE. NOT A PARADE OF COMMERCIALS!!!! We have an exchange student here that we made get up just to watch this. She has since fallen back asleep because this coverage is so terrible. She was excited to see the marching bands, but has not seen a single one. Every time it looks like a band is coming up, the coverage cuts to commercials. A few balloons, a couple floats and some celebrities does not a parade make. We will never watch this parade again. Thanks for ruining a family holiday tradition CBS.

The fun for me this year came from reading and posting comments on Twitter during NBC's parade telecast. At a few commercial breaks, I flipped over to CBS in case I saw something silly.

As you would expect, the new balloons looked less wrinkled than the older ones. I thought it was an odd choice to put the new Mickey Mouse balloon on an inflatable boat anchor. My wife noticed that Poppin' Fresh had a blank blue circle on his toque instead of the Pillsbury logo.

Unfortunately for smart-alecks like me, there were no train-wreck moments in this year's line of march. Singers like Carly Simon and Cheyenne Jackson were barely memorable. Of the lot, I found Jimmy Fallon to be the most entertaining.

When I was a kid, my father took us into the city to see the parade in person each year. After we got home and had dinner, we would look at slides of the parade from previous years. Nowadays, I can read my blog posts from 2005, 2006, 2007 and 2008.

mp-free

The great Knoxville-based website, CouponKatie.com had a link to an offer that was right up my alley. Before November 30, you can get a $3 credit toward the purchase of downloadable mp3s from Amazon.com. Most songs cost only 99¢ each. I got three, which left me with 3¢.

Coupon Katie asked on Twitter which three songs I chose. A Twitter user named Dusty made a funny guess. I could have easily gotten bogged down trying to pick from among the probably millions of available tunes. Fortunately I came up with a plan. I went straight to the Amazon wish list that I have been maintaining for several years and chose one song each from three different CDs. One of the albums appears to be no longer available in its disc form.

Longtime readers may realize that I have been wanting these songs for some time. Two of the three catch my attention each year when I hear them on a local Christian station. A couple of years ago I even called the station to ask who was singing "Sleigh Ride" and "Jingle Bells." The artists were Relient K and Denver & the Mile High Orchestra, respectively.

The third song I chose combined two of my favorite things: the "1812 Overture" and the Brian Setzer Orchestra. Their "1812 Overdrive" is a rockin' version of a classical masterpiece on the "Wolfgang's Big Night Out" album. Did you know that the BSO will be at the historic Tennessee Theatre two weeks from tonight?

While finding the links for the previous paragraphs, I stumbled across another free deal on Amazon. You can download a Christmas album called Sampler Claus free of charge! The seven tracks are from my father's era including a preeminent communion song performed by the late, great Robert Goulet.

help myself in a royal way

Like us, Maestro Brian Salesky was stocking up for Thanksgiving and enjoying the many free samples at Sam's Club when my wife and I bumped into him on Saturday. I was even able to get some Dunkin' Donuts coffee at the Holiday Taste of Sam's Club event. A lady offering tastes of a dried fruit and dark chocolate-covered almond mixture called Bar Harbor Blend shamed me into buying a bag when she caught me coming back for seconds. It reminded me of some very expensive trail mix I had in October.

The Maestro was still very excited that David Keith will play the Pirate King when the Knoxville Opera stages "The Pirates of Penzance" on March 12 and 14. They have already started rehearsals with Keith working on pronouncing every trailing consonant as he sings.

My father was a big fan of Gilbert & Sullivan. I remember him listening to records of D'Oyly Carte Opera Company when he wasn't listening to "regular" opera or Gregorian chants. I think I will try to score some tickets for the Tennessee Theatre in Dad's memory.

electroluminescence

There was no Thanksgiving music during the light show at Smokies Park. In fact, the soundtrack was unabashedly Christmas. Tonight my wife and I attended a media preview of Shadrack's Christmas Wonderland in the parking lot of the baseball stadium in Kodak.

They had a small reception with hot cocoa, hot cider and Christmas cookies just before sunset. As it got dark, Sevierville Mayor Bryan Atchley and Sevier County Mayor Larry Waters cut a ceremonial ribbon held by members of the Glover family, who own and operate Shadrack Watersports. We all headed to our cars and drove through the maze-like course in the parking lot.

The lights formed secular shapes like snowflakes and trees, but the songs that accompanied the display were mostly religious. I heard "Christmas with a Capital C" and "Joy to the World" by Go Fish as well as "Stille Nacht" by Mannheim Steamroller. The music is broadcast on a low-power FM station, which sounded great on our car radio. The various colors appear to dance to the beat. A computer program synchronizes the lights to the music. It's reminiscent of both fireworks and water fountains.

Smokies Park is just off I-40 at exit 407. This is the third light display by Shadrack. In 2007, they started the tradition at their store in Bristol. In 2008, they began doing it at their location in West Knoxville, just off the Watt Road exit. The light shows start again in Bristol on November 13 and in Knoxville on November 19. All three displays will operate nightly from 6:00 to 10:00 p.m. until January 2. It costs $15 per car on weekends and $10 per car on Monday through Thursday nights. The rates are higher for buses, limos and activity vans.

We were told to keep our headlights off as we drove through the mile-long course. As you can see in the photo below, there was a car behind us who left their lights on. Mikki Noel Glover (who is now married and has a different last name) told us that many owners of newer cars have no idea how to turn off their headlights. For some, it involves either the parking brake or the gear shift. By the end of last year, the Glovers had figured out how several different auto models work. They plan to research the information on the Internet and give themselves a refresher course for this year.

shiver me timbers

"60 Minutes" had an interesting story on movie piracy on Sunday night. The report shows how the bad guys sneak video cameras into movie theatres, often hiding them in strollers or diaper bags and using their families to help avoid suspicion. Even here in Knoxville, a security team at advance promotional screenings prohibits audience members from bringing cell phones with cameras into the theatre.

The video pirates sit in the back row where their cameras pick up crowd noises and the silhouettes of people in front. Leslie Stahl asked why anyone would buy a DVD with such poor quality. An expert responded that buyers are not quality-conscious and that they want to pay very little for their entertainment.



In addition to bad DVDs, the pirates are distributing movies online via BitTorrent. The Internet file-sharing brings to mind the problems the music industry faced when Napster first came on the scene. Back then, they would overcharge consumers for albums on CD when the fans actually wanted singles. iTunes came along and dropped the price of a hit song to 99¢ and people gladly paid.

For a time, the movie studios got it right. While a music CD had filler songs we didn't want, DVDs were packed with fancy extras that added value. Plus, the price of a cool DVD was about the same as the price of a lame CD. Now they are trying to get us to buy the same movies we already have in a new, Blu-ray Disc format. They also jerk us around by adding or changing the extra features and releasing new "collector's editions" or "director's cuts."

I suspect that the studios and theatres will use piracy as an excuse to raise ticket prices yet again. What would happen if the studios dropped the price of admission to be the same or less than the cost of a pirated DVD? It would put the pirates out of business and have movie fans lined up at the multiplex.

rockabilly bob

When Jeff Joslin showed us a rough cut of "Fish Bait" during a break from our reshoots in May, I was concerned about my performance. As I mentioned in one of the DVD extras, it sounded like I was using my "outside voice" during the scenes inside a car. Fortunately for me, most of those scenes were reshot.

I was relieved when I saw the movie last week. The editing and soundtrack music made a big difference. I got an email from a woman who attended the screening on Friday night at Patrick Sullivan's with her visiting sisters. They didn't buy a DVD at the bar but now want to get one. Jeff Joslin has set up a PayPal account and a page on the "Fish Bait" site where they (and you) can purchase one now, should you be so inclined.

In addition to the "Fish Bait" theme by Jeffrey Joslin, the soundtrack features two songs from Billy Bob Thornton and The Boxmasters. I first learned of Billy Bob's musical ability while I was working at KLOS. He would appear regularly on the Mark & Brian show in the late '90s to promote his movies. He was on the show one day and heard that rockabilly legend Carl Perkins would be interviewed an hour or two later. Billy Bob asked if he could stick around and see Carl. He did and ended up playing snare drum as Carl sang "Matchbox." We used the performance as a track on the "You Had to Be There!" CD, which hit stores only two months before Carl died.

plastic letters

Most of the display cases at the Farragut Folklife Museum are currently loaded with Barbies. I stopped by for my annual visit on Monday when I went to pay my auto registration at the Knox County offices upstairs. I was amused by the juxtaposition of the doll collection with the axes and other cutting tools on the walls. One of the Barbies was decked out in a real mink coat.



When I got home that day, I found a press release from MomLogic.com in my email. It directed me to an online gallery of new Barbies dressed as pop icons Joan Jett, Cyndi Lauper and Deborah Harry. I was curious since Blondie was my favorite band of the '80s. I remember going to see them at Merriweather Post Pavilion. Their opening act might have been Duran Duran. Thanks to the remarkable Internet, I was able to find out that my memory was correct and that the concert was August 16, 1982.

belly of a whiskered beast

The recent death of Vic Mizzy had many TV critics reminiscing about the good old days of TV theme songs. I saw one website with a list of the best current themes, which included some of my favorites, "Curb Your Enthusiasm," "The Office" and "Dexter."

At the screenings of the no-budget horror film "Fish Bait" over the weekend, I was pleasantly surprised to hear a theme song over the closing credits. Jeffrey Joslin, son of director Jeff Joslin, is a singer-songwriter based in Murfreesboro. Jeffrey appears in the film, entertaining at a party scene. For the end credits, he composed a song called "Fish Bait" that mentions the fictional Fear Hollow Marina and the big catfish my character hopes to catch.

in the brook

It's "Fish Bait" time in Tennessee. The no-budget horror movie featuring the members of Einstein Simplified will have its world premiere this weekend. We're screening it on Friday night at Patrick Sullivan's and on Saturday night at Flat Hollow Marina & Resort. Tickets are $5 at the door.



Erin Donovan from "Live at Five at Four" was kind enough to give us a little publicity for the film. She interviewed Jeff Joslin and me at Volunteer Landing for a story that should air Friday. A moment of potential karma occurred while Erin was interviewing Jeff. Larsen Jay of Doublejay Creative walked by on his way to lunch with some business associates. Erin stopped the interview so that Jeff could meet Larsen.

After I got home from the interview, Jeff emailed me a photo of the DVD cover. "Fish Bait" DVDs and soundtrack CDs will be available for sale at the screenings and eventually via EinsteinSimplified.com. The soundtrack has music from Billy Bob Thornton and Tommy Shaw.



The Lafollette Press published an article about "Fish Bait" in Thursday's paper. Earlier in the week, a showbiz blog ran a nice feature on actress Patrice Bunch. When Erin Donovan's piece is posted on WBIR.com, I will put a link to it here.

just jivin' honey

The elusive deep-fried Oreo almost did it again. Last year I was unable to find one at the Tennessee Valley Fair. I thought I was going to be denied on Friday night too. While leaving the Homer Hamilton Theatre, I saw a sign that plainly said "Deep Fried Oreo's" and should be submitted to ApostropheAbuse.com. The woman in the booth said they had not yet received their Oreos and tried to sell me a funnel cake instead. No thanks.



My wife and I soon saw two friends who told us there were DFOs to be had elsewhere in the park. Their group had purchased a deep-fried sampler plate, which included an Oreo, a Snickers bar, a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and a glob of cookie dough. They could have also chosen a fried PB&J Jamz. Our friends agreed with my theory that of all the deep-fried treats, the Oreo is the best because it can take it. The candy bars tend to melt inside the batter. They sent me the following note and one of the pictures that they put on Facebook. I zoomed in for a close-up on the goods.

Here is the picture of the fried candy. Oreos, Snickers, and Reese's were yummy. Fried raw cookie dough was just weird. Cookie dough should either be cooked or raw, but fried raw was a strange no man's land of mushy goo.

I found what I was looking for at a different trailer. In addition to the usual fare food of burgers and hot dogs, they offered deep-fried Twinkies and Oreos. I had a deep-fried Twinkie once. It wasn't worth it because the filling, which is the best part, liquefied and was absorbed into the cake. Four deep-fried Oreos cost $3. I didn't need or want that many, so I convinced the guy to sell me two for $1.50.



The headliner at opening night of the fair was Rick Springfield. I was shocked to learn that he is 60 years old. I remember the time he came to KLOS and serenaded our phone screener Preva. During Friday's concert, Rick told the women in the audience to close their eyes while he changed shirts. A lot of the ladies knew to bring bouquets of roses, which he whipped against his guitar strings, showering rose petals upon the stage. I bet he always makes the salad at his house.



About an hour before the Springfield concert began, my wife and I wandered past a tent where a hypnotist was just starting his show. Terrance B asked everyone to close their eyes and imagine that their left hand held a heavy book while their right hand was tethered to a helium balloon. The book got heavier while the balloon went higher. I wasn't feeling it. My two hands had barely moved by the time Terrance walked by and selected my wife to follow him to the stage. She was one of about 16 people chosen. He made them think they were watching funny, sad and scary movies. A woman seated in the center of the row onstage was put back to sleep by Hypnodog, a border collie that stared her down.

boom boom pow

Most of the food being sold at the 2009 Boomsday Festival event was typical fair fare, such as corn dogs and funnel cakes. My wife and I spotted a logo that wasn't like the others. Mixed in among the signage was a banner for the tony Ruth's Chris Steak House. We each had a steakburger slider that was so good it didn't need condiments. The restaurant manager told us that the little burgers will debut on their happy hour menu tomorrow. Down the street, one of the guys handing out free Duke's Mayonnaise looked like Chris Daughtry to me.



My wife and I had the good fortune to watch the fireworks from the old Baptist Hospital, near where John Becker and Robin Wilhoit anchored WBIR's coverage. This year the smoke from the explosions drifted away from us, meaning we had a clear view of the spectacular "waterfall" effect off the Henley Street Bridge and the rockets that came up from the lake to the tune of "Smoke on the Water."



After wishing we had done so last year and the year before, we remembered to bring portable radios this year. While big speakers saturate Neyland Drive with sound, the music cannot be heard on the south side of the Tennessee River unless you bring your own receiver.



I was impressed with the Star 102.1 soundtrack this year. There was a three-song tribute to Michael Jackson and a good mix of today's hits and yesterday's favorites. (That's an inside joke for my radio friends.) My wife wanted to know the title and artist of the Christian rock song played near the end off the show. Out of curiosity, I clicked over to Yes.com to see if their bot had identified the tune. It was "I Can Only Imagine" by MercyMe. The site registered many, but not all, of the songs played.



My daughter and two of her friends traveled to East Tennessee to experience their first Boomsday this year. Although I've lived in Knoxville since 2002, this was only my fifth Boomsday. Thanks to my blog, I'm just a click away from the photos of my first Boomsday in 2005. I looked very different back then.

floor plans

The ceremonial ribbon was cut at the new Academy Ballroom this afternoon. The dance studio has completed the move from desolate Downtown West to ritzy Western Plaza, which is close to Sequoyah Hills. The handsome new space allows for beginner and advanced classes to happen simultaneously in separate rooms.



The event was attended mostly by members of the Knoxville Chamber and by several dance instructors, who are independent contractors rather than employees of the studio. Among the refreshments offered were some key lime cupcakes, which were provided by Rhonda Becker. They had a very limey flavor, which I thought could have been in honor of studio owner Richard Bull, a good Englishman.



Jeremy Norris and Emily Loyless asked me to consider repeating (again) my comedic rumba routine with Emily at their Rocky Top Dance Challenge on September 19 at the Knoxville Marriott. That would give me only three weeks to practice. I am going to think about doing it though, because the event is a benefit for Family Promise of Knoxville, a great local charity.



My wife and I plan to attend the Grand Opening party at the new Academy Ballroom on Saturday night. They'll have drinks, hors d'oeuvres and live music. Dancing to live music is a challenge to me. I still have trouble finding the beat, as my wife discovered when we went to a few Brad Walker Orchestra shows at the Kerbela Temple. While the waltz and rumba have a basic box step that is in my comfort zone, it is the foxtrot and swing that I will mostly encounter in real world situations. Heather Tang promised to help me with some basic foxtrot steps at the party. We'll see if I can actually get the hang of it or not.

y'all come back now y'hear?

The Brian Setzer Orchestra is coming to Knoxville! This is a huge deal for me. I so badly wanted to see their show in Nashville a few years ago but couldn't make it. Sixteen weeks from now they will bring the Christmas Rocks! Extravaganza to the Tennessee Theatre. I must somehow get tickets to be there on December 8th.

The BSO released two new songs on iTunes today. Two more will come out next week in advance of the new album, "Songs from Lonely Avenue," due October 13th. Megan from Surfdog Records was kind enough to send along copies of the first two tracks for me to hear.



"Trouble Train" is an uptempo song that warns "if you hear the devil call your name, don't get on that trouble train." The powerful horns on the album were arranged by 87-year-old Frank Comstock. He wrote music for many big stars of the past and also wrote the "Rocky & Bullwinkle" theme.



"Lonely Avenue" is a slow number that captures the film-noir feeling that Setzer is going for. The new album is the first entirely written by Brian himself. The disc will include ten vocal tracks and three instrumentals.

My wife and I saw several Brian Setzer Orchestra shows when we lived in California. I have great memories of the concerts at the Greek Theatre, the Universal Amphitheatre and the House of Blues one New Year's Eve. Obviously, it's been a long time since then. I have been hoping they would come to East Tennessee for years.

cookville

The women vastly outnumbered the men at the David Cook concert tonight. Well, at least they did in the first 15 or so rows at the Tennessee Theatre. The "American Idol" winner inspired girls to bring signs and dress up in shirts with his name. It was the 100th show on this tour and we all got free commemorative t-shirts.



My co-worker Gretchen and I introduced the show. We thought it would be funny if she tried to apply guyliner to me while I was reading the safety announcements. Unfortunately she forgot to bring her eyeliner. We had to use my wife's mascara instead. As she put some of the goop on my lashes, I said "David Cook doesn't wear mascara. Adam Lambert wears mascara!" The crowd loved it. In fact the audience was very receptive to Gretchen and me. As we posed for photos with listeners at intermission, I felt more like we were at a station event (such as a StarJam show) than at a "normal" concert.

Earlier in the day, Gretchen had interviewed David. She challenged him to learn to play "Rocky Top." He suggested that she bring a CD of the song for his sound guy to play as the band's intro music. Back at the radio station, I burned a disc with the song on it. We gave it to the right people and it got played just as David and the band took the stage. The sound guy was a little angry that I had mixed a Star 102.1 Go Vols jingle onto the front of the song. It turns out that he's a Florida Gator fan.

The concert was fantastic. He played mostly songs from his album and at least one that didn't make the cut, called "Souvenir." I got to hear my favorite David Cook song, "Come Back to Me." He referenced the way he had reinterpreted songs on "American Idol" before launching into an unrecognizable cover version of Cutting Crew's "(I Just) Died in Your Arms Tonight."



At the meet and greet after the show, David said he was surprised by the dance mix of Rocky Top. He expected it to sound like a John Denver song. I explained that I brought the version we play on our station, not the version they play on the old-school country station up the dial.



Several fans waited in the street outside David's tour bus after the show. I didn't notice the girl with the Gene Simmons tongue until after I got home and looked at the photos on my computer.

sacré veinard

"Who is Gilles Marini?" asked one of my Facebook friends when I posted that I was going to interview him. I assumed everyone knew the debonair Frenchman from "Dancing with the Stars."



He may have lost to Shawn Johnson but his career has definitely benefited from the exposure. He is soon to be seen on "Brothers & Sisters." Thanks to his good looks, he was asked by record producers if he could sing and is now working on recording an album. I was interested in his childhood because I read that he practically grew up in a bakery. Mmm... cake.

Anyhow, I played some highlights of my interview with Gilles on the air this morning. The Internet gives me the opportunity to post the entire 8 minute interview for all the Gilles fanatics out there. The best part is probably when he says he learned English from listening to hip-hop music. Really.



After I put down the Zoom H2 Handy Recorder, I asked Gilles to show me some moves I could take to the dance floor.

jip-jam-jump

Going to the Starlight Bowl was one of my favorite things about living in Burbank. On summer Sunday nights, we would pack a picnic dinner and head up the hill to see a concert by a cover band such as Captain Cardiac and the Coronaries. Occasionally a nationally known act like Rockapella or an "oldies act" like Don McLean would appear.

I was impressed by the quality of this year's headliners, which include three artists whose success was more recent than the acts I remember seeing at the Starlight Bowl. Colin Hay from Men at Work performed last month. The season closes out when Gin Blossoms take the stage on August 16th. The concert I wish I could attend is booked for this coming Sunday. Big Bad Voodoo Daddy will play the Starlight Bowl on August 9th.

My wife and I had the pleasure of seeing Big Bad Voodoo Daddy on New Year's Eve 1999 in Pasadena. They were the opening act for Chicago at a Disney gala for "Fantasia 2000." Because of fear of Y2K, a lot of people who bought tickets to the black-tie event decided to stay home. As a result, some friends of ours were offered tickets and were able to get another pair for us.

According to the Starlight Bowl website, Sunday's show is called "100 Years of Cab Calloway featuring Big Bad Voodoo Daddy." I've been a fan of Calloway ever since I saw him in "The Blues Brothers." One of my Facebook friends recently posted a link to a great video of Cab singing "Jumpin' Jive" with a dance performance by the incredible, gravity-defying Nicholas Brothers. I am tempted to spend some time looking for Cab Calloway videos and Nicholas Brothers videos on YouTube. To bring it all full circle, I met Fayard Nicholas twice, once at Burbank on Parade and once at the Starlight Bowl.

two kings

Someone should write a book comparing the lives and deaths of Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley. The early news reports I heard failed to see the obvious similarities. Both were the absolute biggest things in all of music and all of pop culture during their heyday. Both fell into a weird, isolated decline. Both looked completely different in their later years. Both deaths were originally said to be "cardiac arrest." CNN is reporting that Michael, like Elvis, had problems with prescription medications.

Former Jackson publicist Michael Levine issued the following statement via his LBN E-lert: "As someone who served as Michael Jackson's publicist during the first child molestation incident, I must confess I am not surprised by today's tragic news. Michael has been on an impossibly difficult and often self-destructive journey for years. His talent was unquestionable but so too was his discomfort with the norms of the world. A human simply can not withstand this level of prolonged stress."

Although he had already died, Elvis was technically Michael's father-in-law for a while. I was sitting in the audience at Radio City Music Hall during the MTV Video Music Awards when Michael and Lisa Marie Presley walked on stage and kissed. I got to go to the VMAs each year when I worked at KROQ.

In the late '80s, I had an even closer encounter with Michael Jackson. He came to the D.C. area to accept an award. I don't recall exactly how I got an invitation to cover the event. I was told to rent a tuxedo and bring a tape recorder. I drove to a multi-million dollar home in McLean. I parked off-site and took a shuttle to the party. The members of the press were ushered into a smaller building that was probably a garage or carriage house. A large room had been set up as if for a press conference. I was told to plug my tape recorder into a mult box, which provided an audio feed to the camera crews. While we waited for Michael to arrive, I struck up a fun conversation with Ann L. Trebbe, who was then a reporter for The Washington Post. She later went to work for USA Today. Michael stepped to the podium and made some brief generic remark like "I love you all, thank you very much." Don & Mike would play that audio for years anytime Michael's name came up.

After the worthless press event, the media representatives were allowed to go next door to the party. We were all dressed in formal wear, after all. The room buzzed when Michael made his entrance. He walked through the crowd, saying hello in his shy way to party goers who had paid top dollar to be there. As he got close to me, I reached out my hand and told him that I was with the local top-40 station, WAVA. I saw a change in his demeanor as his gloved hand shook mine very firmly and he said in a normal voice, "Thank you for your support."

I was working the afternoon shift at Star 102.1 on Thursday when TMZ.com reported that Michael had died. When I turned on the microphone, I wasn't totally sure what I was going to say. I said the date a couple of times and then said that the news I was about to deliver was as big as the death of Elvis was to the listeners' parents or perhaps grandparents.

if you look up sidekick in the dictionary...

When Johnny Carson retired, Ed McMahon still had to work. Some of that may have been for the money but much of it was for the love of doing it. With Johnny stepping out of the limelight, Ed had a chance to be the center of attention as host of "Star Search," a show he tirelessly promoted.

Ed's financial problems and health problems inspired me to express my best wishes for him in previous blog entries. Now that he has passed away at age 86, I am again filled with thoughts of the good times he brought to us at KROQ in the '90s.

In those days at KROQ, we had the chance to feature a few entertainers who didn't fit the format. Johnny Cash got some attention from the alternative rock audience when he came by to plug "American Recordings." The lineup for the 1993 Acoustic Christmas concert included Tony Bennett. Six months later, we invited Ed McMahon to the 1994 Weenie Roast concert. We asked Ed to dress in the grunge attire of the day and come onstage to introduce Rollins Band.



Ed had been a morning show guest enough times that we could ask him to do almost anything. I could pick up the phone and call him or his wife Pam to see if he was available. I will always remember walking into Ed's house with a digital tape recorder and having him record the intro to Kevin & Bean's Christmas cassette in his memorabilia-filled study. Another time we needed him dressed in a suit on the beach for a video shoot with Jenny McCarthy. She wore a bikini.



After doing all these favors for us, Ed still felt like doing more. He invited Kevin & Bean to appear on "Star Search" as guest announcers. The show was recorded at Walt Disney World. They flew several of us and our wives to Florida to do the morning radio show before the TV taping later that day. After the show, Ed took us all out to dinner with that week's celebrity judges. My wife and I sat at a table with Martha Quinn and "Weird Al" Yankovic.

My wife and I had the chance to sit at the same table with Ed and Pam at another event. We were all guests at Kevin Ryder's wedding. I think that was the same year that Ed invited us to his birthday party. To this day, I still regret being so sick with flu-like symptoms that I had to stay in bed and miss Ed's party. It was a milestone year for him. As I recall, he had reached the age at which his father died and was thankful to still be around. We would have all been thankful to have him around even longer.

pity the fils

Sharing a meal with a vegetarian friend of ours usually means we'll be eating at one of three places: Trio Café, Panera Bread or Ruby Tuesday. On Friday night, my wife, our son and I met our friend at Ruby Tuesday in the mall for the salad bar.

During dinner I told him that I had talked about him on the radio recently. He had backstage passes to a Gavin Rossdale performance but didn't know much about him. When he met the singer, all he could think to ask was, "so, you're married to Gloria Estefan?" Brush with greatness fail. (FYI: Rossdale is married to Gwen Stefani.)

We talked about a couple of celebrity encounters from my past including the Donny Osmond "don't you wish you were me" story. My wife remembered the 7-Eleven shopping sprees I used to do at WAVA. After a celebrity was on the air with Don & Mike, I would escort them across Lee Highway to 7-Eleven. I used the phone behind the counter to provide on-air play-by-play as the celebrity grabbed as much stuff as he or she could in 30 seconds. It's hard to remember all the stars who made the walk with me. Mr. T came to mind because I still have a picture of him walking back to the radio station. I spent the better part of an hour looking for it in a stack of photo albums in the basement.



The series of anecdotes prompted my son to point out that I have never told him many of my old tales. They just don't come up in our normal conversations. It's as if I need to be prompted to remember them. I wonder if any of you former WAVA or KROQ or KLOS listeners can suggest some stories my son would enjoy.

pink ribbons

The silent auction items are starting to arrive for the charity event my friend Maureen is co-chairing. She owns Fox Chase Farm in Middleburg, Virginia, which will host the Ride for the Cure Virginia to benefit Susan G. Komen for the Cure.

The media sponsor for the October event is WJLA-TV in nearby Washington, DC. Maureen is thrilled that Greta Kreuz and Suzanne Kennedy are planning to ride horses at the function.

Susan Olsen has promised to send an autographed copy of her upcoming book "Love to Love You Bradys: The Bizarre Story of The Brady Bunch Variety Hour." Maureen sent me photos of two autographed items that have already arrived. Melissa Etheridge sent a copy of her greatest hits CD. My pal Jimmy Kimmel sent a personalized basketball jersey.

yo old lady

Marshal Andy Smalls invited me to his Big Band Showcase at the Bearden Banquet Hall yesterday afternoon. He performs there on the last Sunday of every month, alternating between big band and western shows. The price of admission includes a buffet meal from Buddy's Bar-B-Q. They were supposed to serve chicken yesterday. Due to a scheduling mix-up, we had some delicious pulled pork instead. Normally the pork is served every other month during Marshal Andy's western music show.

My wife and I sat at a table with Brad Walker and Gary Bluemel, "the singing deejay." Gary would sing two songs with the band later on. During lunch, Brad told me about his new show on WKTI, Sunday afternoons at 3:00. He said he might have me on as a guest to talk about some of my favorite songs.

The Sisters of the Silver Sage were the opening act. They sang songs like "Mr. Sandman" and "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy" rather than their western tunes. Their calendar shows them performing at Marshal Andy's Cowboy Jamboree next month, presumably with pulled pork on the menu.



Near the end of his set, Marshal Andy surprised me by announcing that I was in the audience and asking me to come up to the microphone. Although it was the Big Band Showcase, he was going to try to teach me to yodel like Eddy Arnold. I warned him that I couldn't sing, much less yodel. All I had to do was follow him, he said. Before starting, he said that if I knew the song, I should make sure not to get ahead of his lead. I didn't want to offend the good Marshal but I don't know any Eddy Arnold songs. In fact, until recently, I used to get Eddy Arnold confused with the guy from "Green Acres." Fortunately (I think), my wife was quick to grab the camera and switch it to video mode. You can see me nervously grabbing my pockets.

backstage with the Bible

Here's an email and my reply:

Hey Frank,

I remember some time ago you doing a little song about the Ten Commandments that was to the tune of Burger King's "Have It Your Way" jingle. I really liked it and I have been looking on your blog but could not find it. Could you send me the lyrics or a link if you can? That would be great. I want to use it at summer Bible school.

Thanks,
Anthony H.

----------

Hi Anthony,

As I recall, I had posted the lyrics to the Star 102.1 website rather than my own. Unfortunately it looks like the station site doesn't have archives that old. I will take a look for it in my files.

Thanks for listening,

Frank

The segment Anthony wants to hear is from October 12, 2007. A news story about more people knowing the ingredients of a Big Mac than the Ten Commandments prompted me to say that it might be more evenly matched if the Commandments also had a catchy jingle. Marc & Kim challenged me to make one up. The Burger King Whopper jingle gave me more to work with, so I used it instead. They were surprised that it only took me an hour. I felt that Wayne Brady could have done better in a minute. Take a listen and tell me what you think. Will it be heard at Vacation Bible School?



Ten Commandments jingle
(to the tune of "hold the pickle hold the lettuce")

No false gods, no name in vain
Or you'll have eternal pain
All we ask is that you follow His holy way

Keep the Sabbath like no other
Honor your father and your mother
All we ask is that you follow His holy way

No killing, cheating, stealing, lying
You'll regret it when you're dying
All we ask is that you follow His holy way

Last of all you should not covet
Life's important, you should love it
All we ask is that you follow His holy way

Live it His way, His holy Way
Live it His way, His holy Way!

ella ella ella

Every time I hear Rihanna's song "Umbrella," I'm reminded of an acoustic cover version I heard a couple of months ago when my wife and I were shopping at Kohl's. I actually liked the acoustic version better. No offense to Rihanna, who now has her own line of umbrellas from Totes. I meant to do a little Google research when I got home and kept forgetting. Until now.

My best guess is that the song we heard over the speakers at Kohl's was by Marié Digby. She has a YouTube channel and pages on Facebook and MySpace. I guess I'm a little late coming to the party, since Marié's cover of "Umbrella" has over 13 million views. My son and I also enjoyed her cover of Linkin Park's "What I've Done." Marié is described as another YouTube sensation, not unlike Julia Nunes, who my wife and I met last month.



In a recent video, Julia mentioned that her Knoxville audiences were "packed with the friendliest people who gave me cake and marshmallow guns and a zombie crocheted version of myself. It was insane!" Last year Julia was the opening act for four shows with Ben Folds. In the middle of those four shows, he went off to play at Bonnaroo. This year Julia will be performing at Bonnaroo and returning to The Square Room in Knoxville just before that. According to her latest video, she needs to choose a local opening act for her June 9th gig and is open to suggestions.

Ben Folds was mentioned in USA Today on Wednesday. The article was about the increase in popularity of a cappella groups on college campuses. He put out an album of his songs that were covered by 14 different student a cappella groups. It's called "Ben Folds Presents: University A Cappella!" The article also has me wanting to read a book titled "Perfect Pitch: The Quest for Collegiate A Cappella Glory" by Mickey Rapkin. I'll start by reading his blog.

and three in Crossville

A 16-second video on Facebook got me laughing last night. It combines local news and dancing in a different way than the recent "Star 102.1's Dancing with the Knoxville Stars."

Eric Foxx may be everyone's favorite person at WBIR. He's the floor manager for "Live at Five at Four." I see him there every time Einstein Simplified appears on the show. He's there every time I go to the Children's Hospital Telethon. He's also there every year at Boomsday when I stop by the pre-fireworks broadcast.

Brittany Bailey introduced herself to me on St. Patrick's Day. She and Alison Morrow had stopped by Patrick Sullivan's just as our improv show was ending. She promised to come back to catch a performance from the beginning some day.

The video I'm enjoying so much is on WBIR's Facebook page. It shows Brittany and Foxxy getting their "Let's Groove" on during a commercial break. It reminded me of some mostly deleted YouTube videos from a TV station in Philadelphia. They used to have a segment called "Mascot Monday," in which local costumed characters danced with Jennaphr Frederick. Let's try to convince WBIR to add such a feature to "Live at Five at Four."

game on

How many times did my wife and I vote for Adam Lambert on "American Idol" last night? We lost count.

I was working from 8 to 10 p.m. and didn't know which phone number was for Adam and which was for little Kris Allen and his George Jetson mouth. I had enough of a break to make a quick phone call. When I got through on the 01 number, I expected the recorded voice to tell me for which contestant I had cast my blind ballot. All it said was "thanks for voting for contestant one; watch American Idol tomorrow on Fox; sponsored in part by AT&T."

Worried that I had voted for the wrong guy, I scrolled through the contact list on my phone looking for someone who would have been paying attention. My goddaughter is a huge fan of "Idol," so I called her and asked which numbers were for which singer. The odd numbers were for Adam.

Later while we watched the show on our DVR, my wife and I sat there like a couple of tweens with our cell phones voting for Adam. It was much too easy to get through on his lines, which made us vote all the more. As of late last night, DialIdol.com had Kris leading by a slight margin. Of course that was before the Glambert-loving West Coast fans had a chance to call.

Adam performed like a professional while Kris looked like a talented amateur and not just because of his creepy mustache. My wife said that Adam had more vocal control and an incredible range. He played to the audience better than Kris too. The difference was most notable on the horrible song that Kara DioGuardi co-wrote for them both to sing.

Win or lose, Adam will be fine. He's guaranteed a successful career either way. In a way I'm reminded of the year that Ruben Studdard defeated Clay Aiken. In the time since then, Clay has had a more impressive career. At the time I wanted Ruben to win but in hindsight I think Clay deserved the title.

crazy like a

It's almost become a tradition for me to watch the Fox upfront presentation at WTNZ. I always enjoy the opportunity to see a preview of the upcoming fall season.

The show that got the most attention was "Glee." I've been hearing about it a lot lately, including yesterday afternoon on NPR. Something did confuse me, however. "Glee" seems like a perfect fit for the timeslot after "American Idol." In fact, it will get a preview in that slot tonight. However in the Fall, it will follow "So You Think You Can Dance." When "Idol" returns next Winter, it will be followed by "Past Life" and "Human Target."

Other than "Glee," the Fall series that got the most attention was a comedy with Michael Strahan called "Brothers." Another comedy called "Sons of Tucson" looked a little more promising to me. Usually the show I like best is the first one canceled.

community swing

The Brad Walker Orchestra rocked the Kerbela Temple on Saturday night. Brad, whose grandfather was Cas Walker's cousin, invited me to attend the swing dance party during our conversation at "Star 102.1's Dancing with the Knoxville Stars." I would have gone just to hear the big band music, however after my participation in the contest, I promised my wife that I would attempt to learn some social dancing skills. I need more lessons.



Most of the chairs were taken when we arrived. We found a table with some room and introduced ourselves to the people already there. The couple next to us was Tony and Joan DeDominick. As it turns out, Tony teaches dance courses on Wednesday nights through the University of Tennessee Outreach & Continuing Education program. He suggested we take his lessons but they conflict with my wife's choir practice.

One of the first songs we heard was "Sing, Sing, Sing," a favorite of mine. I quickly realized that I was in way over my head on the dance floor. During the "Tennessee Waltz," I wanted to stay in one place with my little box step. We got bumped repeatedly by others traveling around the floor.



We saw a few familiar faces. Charlie and Jackie Goodreau both take lessons at Academy Ballroom and they've come to several Einstein Simplified shows. Jackie asked me to dance and helped me with the foxtrot and the traveling part of the waltz. She said she could tell I was very tense. Jackie also suggested I check out some of the instructional dance videos offered by Comcast On Demand. Academy Ballroom owner Richard Bull and his wife were in the crowd too.

Radio personality Eddie Beacon sat at a table across the dance floor. He was using a laptop with a webcam to offer live streaming video of the event. He told me about LiveVideo.com where anybody can do the same. I saw Brad and Eddie today as they were recording their weekend radio show with Marshal Andy on WKTI. Brad said the orchestra will be at the Temple again soon. Sounds like a plan.

me gotta go

There was no "Underdog" moment for me in last night's Dogwood Arts Festival parade but I still enjoyed myself for the most part. The parade remained completely stopped for a long time while some performances were taking place for the lone working camera from WVLT. I later learned that a high school group did a scene from their production of "Guys and Dolls." You would think that the young thespians would then walk or ride down the rest of the parade route. They didn't. For those of us a block or two down the street, it was just awkward.

The parade feature two character balloons and two dogwood flower balloons. My wife thought they had too many petals to be true dogwoods, as did a blog reader last year. The colorful dragon dragon might explain why I was craving Chinese food on the way home. My wife and I got some take-out from the new China Lee on Middlebrook Pike. It was very good.



While the dragon made it past us okay, the Garfield balloon got a flat tire. It appears to be the same one I saw two years ago and is starting to show its age.



The annual parade is obviously a kid-friendly event. The crowd went "ooh" to the flaming-baton twirler on Gay Street and "aah" to the cute little cowgirl with an amusing costumed horse.



WVLT anchor Lauren Davis rode past in the Channel 8 mobile. She was also at the secret Miley Cyrus event earlier this month. I didn't get a good look at the driver of the convertible but I thought it might have been Bob Yarbrough, who was at the goodbye party for Stacy McCloud.

Barney Fife impersonator Sammy Sawyer was being followed by a high def video camera. It made me wonder if they were making a reality show or documentary about him. Wouldn't you watch it?



It's not a Knoxville parade without Marshal Andy. Earlier this week he wished me well in "Star 102.1's Dancing with the Knoxville Stars" competition. He said that he and his wife used to regularly win shag dancing contests in the Carolinas.

The Grand Marshal of the parade was Mary Costa from "Walt Disney's Sleeping Beauty." Tired of waiting for the parade to come to me, I had walked up the street to see that while Mary's coach was stopped, some young dancers performed to "Once Upon a Dream" while mouse-eared volunteers (or as they called them in Burbank, VoluntEARS) held flags and "Sleeping Beauty" signage celebrating the 50th anniversary of the film



The Dogwood Arts Festival is 49 years old. Instead of their regular uniforms, the Powell High Panther Band wore 1950s attire like white t-shirts and jeans or poodle skirts. Three different high school bands each played "Louie Louie," a song technically from the '50s but made famous in 1963. Hearing it reminded me of the time I arranged for a marching band play that song accompanied by rock guitarist Slash in the KLOS parking lot.

My favorite float in this year's parade was from Laurel High School. It took me a moment to recognize the Sunsphere due to either the rat tail or graduation tassel hanging off the back.

nooner

The only cover song my wife and I heard during Julia Nunes' set on Friday afternoon was "Bye Bye Bye." She introduced it by saying that she could never write such angry lyrics. Although I would have liked to hear more covers, it made perfect sense that she would emphasize her original songs while on the radio. Julia was the lead-off performer at the WDVX Blue Plate Special. Her banter with the show's host was enjoyable and reminiscent of the monologues on her YouTube videos.



When Julia had finished her set, I started to tell her that Richard Cheese had emailed me about her. Before I could say anything else, she asked, "are you Frank?" Obviously Richard had told her that I might show up at The Square Room. To me, the picture that my wife took offers proof that I had been to Sun Tan City the night before as I continue to prepare for "Dancing with the Knoxville Stars."



One wall of The Square Room is actually a giant window. Diners at Café 4 can see and hear the concert from the other side of the glass. Months before either place opened, I got a coupon for a free cupcake from the café. The end of Lent presented the perfect opportunity to redeem it. The "Happy Happy Joy Joy" cupcakes looked good but I ruled those out because my wife can't eat coconut. Instead we took home a "Chocolate on Chocolate" to split later. The icing was great. However the cake itself was a tad too dry and crumbly for my taste.

fungus tingly duck sheets

Richard Cheese knows that I enjoy cover songs. He usually sends me a copy of his CDs, like he did with "Viva La Vodka." RC took a moment after his sold-out show in DC to send me a message about the artist who will be opening for him on Saturday in New York because she'll be in Knoxville on Friday.



Julia Nunes (rhymes with tunes), plays ukulele and sings cover songs on YouTube. She does originals too but I haven't gotten to any of those yet. I've watched and re-watched her amusing videos for "Build Me Up Buttercup," "Baby Now That I've Found You" and "Baby It's Cold Outside." After the songs end, Julia often talks to the camera. Her comments are as much fun to watch as the singing.

If time allows, I will try to catch Julia's performance on the WDVX Blue Plate Special at noon. I assume that she will open for Todd Steed and the Suns of Phere rather than the other way around. Obviously I can listen on the radio, however I hope to get there in person. Besides, I have a coupon for a free cupcake at the adjoining Café 4.

Attending the Blue Plate Special means two trips downtown for me the same day. I already have tickets to see the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra at the historic Tennessee Theatre on Friday night. Since my wife will be on stage singing with the Knoxville Choral Society, I'll have an empty seat next to me. Know anybody who might want to go hear the Polovtzian Dances on short notice?

cyrus circus

Friday's unannounced appearance by Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus gave me a chance to chat with other members of the media and to fraternize with a couple of my dancing competitors. Oh and I also talked with the stars of "Hannah Montana The Movie," who were in Knoxville briefly as part of Walt Disney Pictures Opening Weekend Surprise. Marc & Kim and I were asked to "interrupt" the noon showing of the film, give away t-shirts and then bring out Miley and Billy Ray. I tried to take a picture but found myself on the wrong side of them. There are more photos on the Star 102.1 website and at Knoxville.com.



The local media were there in full force. All three news stations sent their own crews, as did the News Sentinel. Terry Morrow and Lauren Spuhler represented the paper and its website. Terry felt it necessary to strike a pose when I took a picture of Lauren Davis from WVLT and Beth Haynes from WBIR. While we were all waiting for Miley to arrive, I talked with Terry and Beth about our upcoming dance performances. Lauren Davis wanted to hear about it too. In the course of the conversation about me facing my fear of dancing, I showed her a couple of "before" photos that were on my Walkman.



Kristyn Caddell from WATE joked that we always seem to see each other at the "fun" stories. She also covered the new Bishop's press conference and the Christmas penguin. I asked Kristyn to turn around for a picture because at the time, I could see Miley over her shoulder. But then Miley moved on to the next interview along the press line.



The behind the scenes passageways inside the Regal Pinnacle Stadium 18 would have allowed Miley and Billy Ray to walk unseen from the theatre to the interviews in an upstairs conference room. However Miley found her way to a balcony where she could wave to the fans who didn't get in to the noon show.



The next stop for the Cyruses was Salt Lake City where they repeated the surprise. The Salt Lake Tribune says Miley received some Marshmallow Peeps, which are her favorite.

nannerpuss

After the town hall meeting at All Saints Church on Saturday, my wife and I made a beeline for the mountains in an effort to catch a movie at the Gatlinburg Screenfest. The meeting had run long and the rainy weather slowed our drive which made us miss the beginning of the film. Fortunately, my pal Brad Bumgardner is one of the festival organizers. After the screening room cleared, he restarted it for us. He happens to be in "Boys of Summerville," the movie we drove all that way to see. Most of his screen time comes early in the film including the corn dog scene that I mentioned last year. Brad stole the show, as expected. I told him I would have enjoyed seeing his character more. How about a "Summerville Origins: Murr" prequel?

After the movie, we looked for a place to get something for dinner. Driving past all the pancake joints in Gatlinburg and Pigeon Forge left me with a craving. I hadn't had a pancake since that Oreo concoction last summer. Obviously I wasn't going to wait six or seven hours for one of the breakfast restaurants to open. The problem was solved as a familiar sign came into view.

The only Denny's within 50 miles of my house is in Pigeon Forge. We walked in around midnight, thinking that getting a table would be easy. Not so much. The place was packed with church group kids who were in town for the Smoky Mountain Winterfest at Thompson-Boling Arena. Note to the KTSC: the chaperones told us that even though the event moved to Knoxville, they continue to stay at hotels in Pigeon Forge because there is more there for the kids to do.

The large groups taxed the restaurant staff. Our waitress disappeared after taking our order. She had to serve a group of 70 kids from Georgia who were wearing matching t-shirts. Half an hour after we placed our order, another server delivered our Grand Slam Breakfasts and refilled our water glasses. While we waited, some women approached a large man with Elvis hair and glasses at an adjacent table. They wanted a picture with him.

The delay gave me plenty of time to study the amusing Rockstar menu featuring items named after alternative bands and a plug for the Warped Tour. The menu got me thinking that the last time I was at a Denny's was either in Burbank or maybe at the rock 'n' roll Denny's on Sunset Boulevard. Oh, and the two pancakes satisfied my craving for another six months or so.

march forth

After the Washington Post included him in their "Post Mortem" blog, Perez Hilton wrote that Ed McMahon is still "alive and kicking." The report that the retired Marine Colonel was ill and "fighting the good fight" has him and his family in my thoughts and prayers again. Last year the news of his money trouble prompted me to write about the great times we had with him while I worked at KROQ. I don't know that Ed will be ego-Googling any time soon but I hope that my best wishes somehow reach him and that he has a happy 86th birthday on Friday.

Shortly after reading read about Ed yesterday, I coincidentally got a notification that I had been tagged in a photo on Facebook. The picture shows a group of us with Ed, Henry Rollins and Beck. We were posing backstage at the 2nd Annual KROQ Weenie Roast. The other station employees pictured are Jed the Fish, Jay "Lightning" Tilles, Thomas Guide, Bill Smith and Tami Heide. As you can see, Ed had no problem wearing his grunge clothes to go onstage and introduce Rollins Band.

absolut gouda-ness

Today's mail had something my wife knew I would appreciate. Mixed in among the bills and catalogs was a padded envelope from our friend Richard Cheese. He sent along a copy of his new CD, "Viva La Vodka: Richard Cheese Live." It goes on sale in April however fan club members can get it earlier.



Dick's shtick is incredibly useful to parents. He takes popular songs and sings them lounge style, often making the unintelligible intelligible. Perhaps, like me, you never knew or cared exactly how filthy the lyrics of "Me So Horny" actually were. I can't un-ring that bell, but at least I got a laugh out of it. One of the best tracks on the disc is the Pussycat Dolls' song "Don't Cha." During the performance, Richard slips into vocal impressions of Bob Dylan and George Takei. TV tunes fans will like hearing the themes from "Three's Company" and "WKRP in Cincinnati" and KROQ fans will get a kick out of hearing a cover of Weezer's "Hash Pipe," which was recorded live on the Kevin & Bean show. By the way, check out the great lineup for Kevin & Bean's April Foolishness comedy show.

Most of "Viva La Vodka" was recorded at the 9:30 Club in Washington, DC. I remember going there back in the days when the club was actually at 930 F Street. Richard Cheese & Lounge Against the Machine return to the 8:15 Club 9:30 Club on April 15.

force of habit

In an effort to see at least some of the Oscar nominees before the awards ceremony, my wife and I watched "Doubt" this afternoon. The story takes place in 1964, before people became aware of the failings of an organization which is built on the forgiveness of sins but exists in a society that requires justice and demands vengeance.

The film is set at a fictional parish in the Bronx within walking distance of the Parkchester neighborhood where my mother grew up. Most impressive was Meryl Streep's perfect accent. She sounded exactly like my Aunt Marion, with maybe a dash of Aunt Grace thrown in. The parish school is run by the Sisters of Charity, an actual order which has put information about the movie on their website.

The first time Father Flynn did the sign of the cross during Mass, I absentmindedly crossed myself along with the onscreen congregation. In that scene, Sister Aloysius hits a disruptive child on the back of the head. I wanted to her to do the same thing to a disruptive audience member at the Regal Downtown West Cinema 8.

My wife said that they used the modern arrangement of "Holy God We Praise Thy Name" instead of the old-school version of the tune. Also, they had the priest deliver his sermons following a hymn instead of right after the gospel proclamation. Several scenes are so theatrical that you can't help but be reminded that the film was adapted from a stage play. There were also a couple of times when the camera is tilted on an angle, just like when a villain's lair was shown on the old "Batman" series.

I hope Viola Davis wins for Best Supporting Actress. There was one emotional scene that should clinch it for her. It's the one where her nose starts running. I may feel differently after I see "The Wrestler," but for now I'm pulling for Viola.

I came out of the theater whistling "Blame it on the Bossa Nova," which is featured during a small scene in the film. It reminded me of an interview I did with Emily Procter when I had a show on the Comedy World Radio Network. At the time, she had a part on "The West Wing." I was rather smitten with her Ainsley Hayes character because of a well-known bathrobe bossa nova scene. I tracked down a copy of the song, which wasn't quite as easy then as it is now, and played it for her during the interview.

a long, long time ago

"The Day the Music Died" was commemorated at the Surf Ballroom on Monday night. Anyone with even a passing knowledge of rock and roll knows that the phrase refers to the plane crash that killed Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens and the Big Bopper. Most people also know it as a lyric from "American Pie," a song by the most famous alumnus of my high school, Don McLean.

When I saw the movie "La Bamba," some girls in the theatre were shocked to tears by the film's ending. I guess they didn't know it was a true story. Los Lobos, the group that provided Ritchie Valens' music for the soundtrack, performed at the Surf Ballroom on Monday as part of the "50 Winters Later" concert. Reading about the tribute show has me interested in watching the possible TV special, should it get made.

A Minneapolis TV station did a story about a woman who recently found her photos from the February 2, 1959 concert. The Des Moines Register has tons of material online about the 50th anniversary of the crash, including something with a Body Farm connection.

In a couple of our interviews, Dr. Bill Bass has described his participation in the exhumation of the Big Bopper. He and Jon Jefferson allowed the Register to reprint a lengthy excerpt about the case from their non-fiction book "Beyond the Body Farm."

it's fun to pray at the RCIA

The concept of Wednesday nights as church nights is something I didn't learn about until after I moved to Tennessee. Many of the Baptists I know attend some sort of meeting on Wednesdays, often after a nice dinner. As a Catholic, I don't have to go to church on Wednesdays, however that is when my wife goes to choir practice at All Saints Church.

Things have changed for me, at least until Easter. Tonight I attended my second meeting for the RCIA at Sacred Heart Cathedral. A former co-worker asked me to be his sponsor as he joins the church. The meetings are on Wednesday nights. The lively discussion tonight focused on the death penalty, abortion, stem cell research and euthanasia. Last week I had a previous commitment and missed the conversation about sins so heinous that they result in automatic excommunication. When my candidate contacted me with questions, I had to research the topic, which was only recently revealed by the Vatican.

I was asked to be a sponsor in the RCIA program twice while living in St. Finbar parish. One of the guys I sponsored in Burbank recently wrote to tell me that he was still active in the music ministry at the church. He's also writing pop songs using the words of Jesus from the Gospel of John. I can't wait to hear them and maybe even share some samples if possible.

promises fulfilled

Bishop-elect Richard Stika was in East Tennessee most of this week. He was introduced at a press conference on Monday. Lori Tucker interviewed him on Tuesday morning for a piece that aired on WATE Thursday night

While he was in town, Stika traveled around the diocese to get acquainted. He went to Catholic Charities to meet their less fortunate clients, including two elderly men who asked him, "Why did the Pope cross the road?" I'm not exactly sure what their punchline was, but it might have been "because he crosses everything."

Bishop-elect Stika returned to St. Louis today. He'll pack up his belongings and his dog Rosie and get back in time for his installation as Bishop on March 19 at the Knoxville Convention Center. I found out the other day that the ordination Mass will start at 2:30 p.m. and last for at least three hours. Plans are being made to webcast the ceremony. I think I would rather be there in person, especially since there will be a reception afterward. The Bishop-elect hopes that all the local Catholic school children will attend too.

If his visit to Tennessee had lasted a day longer, the Bishop-elect could have come to hear the "Journey of Promises" cantata at All Saints Church tonight. Someone from the chancery did check to see if there might have been a rehearsal that he could have attended last night but there wasn't. However they have been practicing for months.

The performance went well and got mentioned on WBIR's late newscast. My friend Kathy had emailed all the TV stations to request that they consider sending a camera, since they would likely have crews right next door to cover the Webb at Catholic basketball game. The publicity will help fill the seat's for Sunday's performance. Admission is free but they do take up a collection for Catholic Charities.

The All Saints choir was joined by members of the Knoxville Symphony Youth Orchestra and a few adult parishioners who can play instruments. I read one of the three spoken word parts. Look closely and you can see Fr. Ragan Schriver and me at the podium in the background of the photo below. We'll play it again on Sunday at 3:00 p.m. I hope to see you there.

well behaved bloggers

Usually the musicians are already on stage when a performance of the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra begins. Tonight the show opened Mariachi style. Eleven people walked out from the wings, the bass players, cellists and harpsichordist sat down but the violinists remained standing as they played Bach's Brandenburg Concerto No. 3 in G Major.

Maestro Lucas Richman made his first appearance of the night after the front part of the stage with the harpsichord was lowered and then raised again with a grand piano on it. Richman thanked the sponsors and welcomed those of us in the audience for the KSO's second blogger night. I suspect that most of the senior citizens in the audience heard "blah blahs, for those who don't know, are people who blah on the Internet."

Soloist Navah Perlman played Mozart's Concerto No. 24 in C Minor with the full symphony. I especially enjoyed the way the violins blended with her performance on the piano on the softer notes. As I listened, I wondered how she could play for 31 minutes without sheet music. Fortunately it was blogger night, so I could just ask her at the post-concert reception. She uses muscle memory and also remembers thoughts and smells that she encountered while learning the piece. She specifically mentioned remembering the smell of a chocolate cake baking while she practiced. Mmm.. cake.



The most accessible opus on the program, and therefore probably my favorite, was Mendelssohn's Symphony No. 4 in A Major. The first movement of the so-called "Italian Symphony" is very familiar. If I was flipping stations and happened to come across it on WUOT, I would turn up the volume and stay in my car until the end of the movement, even if I had reached my destination. During the performance Maestro Richman conducted the orchestra with his whole body. He bounced on his toes with a boyish enthusiasm that reminded me of my own childhood when I would pretend to conduct whatever symphony was coming from my father's record player. I like my classical music loud and fast. At the reception, the maestro told me that he was using his body to express the energy level he wanted from the musicians. He said that famous conductor Kurt Masur uses a lot of energy when rehearsing that piece but barely moves at all during performances of it.

My neighbor is a KSO musician. He was at the reception and we talked about firewood and how I saw him using his chainsaw the other day to cut logs. Another musician said I would be surprised how much stuff they do that is dangerous to their hands. This other guy once cut his finger pretty badly but was happy it happened to his bow hand. A female musician chimed in that she had cut off the tip of a finger but proudly showed how it was successfully reattached.

Navah Perlman was fighting a cold tonight. During our conversation we talked about ordinary stuff too. She could name a couple of grocery stores in each region of the country where she travels like Kroger and Piggly Wiggly in the south and Vons and Ralphs out west. A particular favorite of hers is Fred Meyer in the Northwest. The talk of travel turned to talk of her four kids. The last two are twins. She said if they had come first, she might have stopped right there. Navah's runny nose will not interfere with your enjoyment if you should go to Friday night's performance at the beautiful Tennessee Theatre.

It was a pleasure to chat with several fellow bloggers at the reception as well. Look for links to their reviews to be posted on the spiffy KSO blog soon. We should all try to put our own review links in each others' comment sections too.

party quirks

More often than not, my wife and I stay home on New Year's Eve. One year we went over to the next door neighbor's house. Another year we went to the home of some church friends. We had three memorable New Year's Eves in California.

We rang out 1999 at a spectacular black-tie party for the film "Fantasia 2000." So many people were afraid of Y2K, that we got invited to fill out a table that had been purchased by a corporate sponsor. After a screening of the movie, there was live music by Big Bad Voodoo Daddy and Chicago. Maybe you've heard of them.

Another year we got tickets to see the Brian Setzer Orchestra at the House of Blues. Because the tickets had come from Setzer's management, we found ourselves seated at the same table as Brian's wife. I've already written about the New Year's Eve we spent in Pasadena, getting within smelling distance of the Rose Parade floats.

I had a great time saying farewell to 2008 on Wednesday night. I got to play improv games with my Einstein Simplified pals as part of the First Night Knoxville festival. The evening started early with an appearance on "Live at Five at Four" to promote our performances. Then we had dinner at The Tomato Head, which was packed with people. Despite the huge crowd, the staff found a way to seat our party of 16. I amused myself by ordering the vegetarian chef salad and then having them add free-range chicken to it. The words bacon and salad on the menu got me wondering if there is such a thing as bacon salad. It would have mayo and celery like tuna salad but with bacon instead of fish.

I was a little anxious about whether or not we would draw an audience. Our performance space was in a conference room in an office building across the street from Market Square. I said that I hoped ventriloquist Gene Cordova could draw a crowd. He had shows at 7:00 and 8:00 p.m. in the same room we would use at 9:00. When we got to the TVA West Tower, Gene Cordova had a standing-room only crowd that spilled out into the lobby area. Another conference room across from ours had musical performances by Bantry and Tennessee Schmaltz. They had a decent sized audience too, not Gene Cordova numbers, but decent. Most of the audience who filled the room for our two shows had never seen us before. I was surprised when a former WAVA listener in the crowd re-introduced himself to me. It was Don Samples, cousin of the late Junior Samples. Our shows went very well and I think more than a few of the people will come see us at Patrick Sullivan's in the future.

We ended our second show around 11:30 p.m. and went outside to see the "ball" drop. It was more like a balloon on a tether and not that impressive. Next year they should drop an orange construction barrel, as suggested by reader Cassie. A live band on the Market Square stage made the event feel like Sundown in the City, except for the bitter cold. Like the popular summer event, there were way too many cigarette smokers blowing their exhaust on others. We found a spot that was relatively smoke-free and watched the countdown to midnight. It was 25 seconds slow but who's counting?

sing in exultation

The piece of music that makes it feel like Christmas for me is the "Christmas Festival Overture" by Leroy Anderson. The composer took several popular Christmas carols and songs and arranged them in a medley. The best parts of it were clearly influenced by Tchaikovsky's "1812 Overture." My favorite segment is a mashup of "Jingle Bells" and "O Come All Ye Faithful." There's a new BBC recording of Anderson's holiday works that includes the overture. I literally got goosebumps when I heard the Saint Louis Symphony Orchestra perform the opus on Saturday night.

The SLSO's home is the beautiful Powell Symphony Hall, a former vaudeville and movie house. Prior to the concert, they projected messages on a screen reminding the audience that photography was prohibited and that ushers would provide cough drops before the show started. Coughing must be prohibited too. I was impressed that at one of the refreshment stands they sold slices of cake and pie, egg nog (spiked and regular) and hot cocoa. Meanwhile on stage, soloist Doug LaBrecque put the broad in Broadway as he sang to the rafters. He thanked his arranger Wayne Barker for working up some nice orchestrations to include the excellent St. Louis Children’s Choirs on "Do You Hear What I Hear?"

All the songs we heard at the concert and the songs we heard on the weekend's long car trip got me thinking about the good, the bad and the ugly of Christmas music. Relient K's version of "Sleigh Ride" is a favorite this year. I also still enjoy The Blenders singing "The First Noel" and the Brian Setzer Orchestra doing "Angels We Have Heard On High," which is downloadable for free for a limited time on Amazon.com. Look up pop perfection and you should get "All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey. It is flawless both as a song and as a record. Ask the Grammys if you don’t know the difference between the two.

I've come to realize that "Baby It’s Cold Outside" is really a woman’s song. I don’t like versions in which the female part is a throwaway, for example when Dean Martin sings it with some anonymous chorus girls (sorry, Bean.) I loved the version on the Mark & Brian Christmas album, not because of Barry Manilow but because of the great voice of listener Pamela Holt. Even better is the cover of the song on the "Elf" soundtrack, sung by Zooey Deschanel and Leon Redbone. When Zooey sings the line "my sister might get suspicious," how can you not think of Bones?

My daughter left a comment on Bean's Christmas Music Everyday blog. He posted a song called "Christmas Eve in Washington" that seems to be disliked by everyone I know. As far as I know, it only gets airplay in D.C. That reminds me. Let me air a gripe about all the radio stations that play only Christmas music for the month prior to the holiday. I've already written about the uneven ratio of sacred to secular songs. Now I want to know why you cut us off cold turkey at 11:59 p.m. on the 25th? When you go back to playing the best mix of yesterday's favorites and today's whatever, I'll be listening to Christmas music for a few more days. I think you should leave some Christmas songs on the playlist through New Year's Eve. Oh and one more thing, when you play an instrumental version of "Sleigh Ride," keep in mind that Leroy Anderson was the composer of the piece. You often make it sound like he played all the instruments on the recording by the Boston Pops or another symphony orchestra.

putting the band back together

TNT's annual broadcast of "Christmas in Washington" has become part of my holiday tradition. I found myself looking forward to the telecast for a couple of reasons.

Julianne Hough opened the show. Unfortunately she sounded nervous. When my wife and I saw her sing at the World Grotto accompanied only by a pair of acoustic guitars, she sounded fantastic. In front of First Lady Laura Bush and singing with a full orchestra and a choir full of backup singers Julianne was, how do you say, pitchy. My wife thought that she probably didn't have a good mix in her monitor speakers or earbuds.

My wife had recently heard about a clever version of "The Twelve Days of Christmas." At first she thought her friend was trying to tell her about the old parody song, "The Twelve Days After Christmas." Instead it was a medley of different tunes by a group called Straight No Chaser, who appeared on the show tonight. When Robin McGraw read their introduction, I was interested to learn that they sang together in college, went their separate ways and reunited when an old video of theirs went viral on YouTube. They now have a record deal. I put their CD on my Amazon wish list.

In other random Christmas music news, I've been hearing a lot about the Trans-Siberian Orchestra lately. When I happened to see affianced bloggers Rich and Lissa in Gatlinburg recently, they told me that they are going to the upcoming concert at Thompson-Boling Arena. The TSO also came up in a phone conversation with a friend who was traveling in the Northeast and thought that the band was playing in his area too. During the course of our chat, I got to wondering if the Orchestra could make more money during the holidays by being in two places at once. A look at their tour schedule confirmed my suspicions. On the night that the Trans-Siberian Orchestra plays in Knoxville, they will also be in Indianapolis. The night before that they will be in both Nashville and Detroit. After they play here, they will be in Memphis and Grand Rapids on the same night. Obviously they use two groups of musicians. Wikipedia says they hire local string players in each city but it doesn't say how the principals are divided up. No offense to Indianapolis, but I hope that Knoxville gets the better show that night.

full of grace

Several Baptist churches around the country present Living Christmas Trees but few, if any, do so in as spectacular a fashion as the Sevier Heights Baptist Church in Knoxville. Their presentation outgrew their sanctuary and then the Tennessee Theatre years ago. Five performances of the Knoxville Living Christmas Tree filled Thompson-Boling Arena this weekend.

My wife and I had never seen the LCT, as those in the know call it. It is actually a gigantic choir riser in the shape of a Christmas tree. A segment on the noon news one day last week got me interested in going although our previous commitments didn't make it easy. We already had plans for Saturday. Tonight, my wife and I went to Mass at our own church for the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, a holy day of obligation and the national feast of the USA. It comes nine months before the celebration of Mary's birth. There was only one performance that fit our schedule, Sunday at 3:00 p.m. I went to the website to request a pair of free tickets only to find out that they were "sold out." I gave up my plans to attend and started thinking about going to the Knoxville Nativity Pageant next week instead.

After the Julianne Hough concert on Friday night, my wife and I went to Rita's Ice to share a dessert. As we paid for our Blendini, I saw tickets to the Living Christmas Tree on the counter. There were a few tickets for each of Sunday's two performances. Nancy, the store owner, told me that she had gotten the tickets through her church and that they were free for the taking. I grabbed a pair for the matinee. Call it fate, karma or good luck.

We got there about 45 minutes early. I dropped off Jere at the door and went to park the car. As I got out of my car, I realized that I had parked next to Matt Hinkin. He said that it had been a couple of years since he last saw the LCT. I found my wife in section 105 and sat down. I had brought my copy of "Thank God for Evolution" to read while waiting for the show to start. As the singers began to fill in the 16 levels of the tree, I noticed that their choir robes were just drapes that only covered their shoulders and upper bodies.

I went to the Living Christmas Tree expecting a musical performance. I didn't know it would also include a Nativity pageant, a Passion play, a sermon and a passing of the collection plate. The show was so entertaining that even I was moved to toss in a couple of bucks. In addition to all the other elements, there was a contemporary Christmas story, reminiscent of a schmaltzy TV movie. Hollywood producer Garrett returns to his hometown to expose what he thinks is the hypocrisy of their Christmas celebration. He has a change of heart after his assistant prays for him.



The best parts of the event were the singing and the sermon by guest speaker Scott Dawson. I could have done with slightly shorter talking scenes and more songs during the drama portion. However the show did have first class production values. In a way, it was like a slice of Pigeon Forge right here in Knoxville. In fact, the comic relief characters, Bobby Earl and Skeeter, were a lot like some I saw at the Dixie Stampede last year.

Before the performance, Shannon Leigh from Love 89 welcomed the crowd. She said that they were playing only Christmas music this month. On the way home, I switched back and forth between Love 89 and B97.5. The religious station beat the commercial station on each song I heard. The tunes that gave them the win were "Jingle Bells" by Denver & the Mile High Orchestra and "Sleigh Ride" by Relient K while the B was playing "Do They Know It's Christmas" yet again. You can compare the two station's playlists yourself here and here.

ebony and ivory

A small crowd of country music fans found themselves in the audience for a Poetry Slam on Friday night. Of course they weren't there for the poetry, they were waiting to see Julianne Hough, the true star of "Dancing with the Stars."



I had tried to catch a glimpse of Julianne at the WIVK Fowler's Furniture Christmas Parade along Gay Street. The sidewalks were packed with people who had gotten there a lot earlier than me to reserve their spot. After barely seeing Julianne's float pass by, I made the tough decision to bail on the parade and head over to the World Grotto, where my wife was waiting with our Tele-buddy Terry Morrow. He had interviewed Julianne earlier in the day and joined us for dinner on Market Square. The three of us got good seats on the cushioned benches along the wall near the stage just as the Poetry Slam began. Others sat cross-legged on the floor in front of the stage.



The Poetry Slam is a regular event produced by Black Sunshine Arts and Entertainment. As we waited for Julianne, we heard recitations from local poets RheaSunshine, Dawg, Jump Drive and Black Atticus. We also heard the evening's featured poet Carlos Robson, who had traveled from Charlotte to perform. Most of the country fans listened politely to the poets' left-leaning monologues. However the woman seated behind me spent most of the time chatting with her friends both in person and on the phone. Carlos was quite good and was able to command the audience's full attention. The emcee, RheaSunshine, repeatedly entreated the crowd to stay for more poetry after Julianne's concert. On the whole, the experience made me think of an improv game called "Performance Art" and a new variation we've recently started doing at Einstein Simplified shows called "Beatnik Coffeehouse."



As Rhea began to wrap up their first set, I went to the bathroom, thinking that I might catch a glimpse of Julianne's entourage in one of the other Grotto rooms down the same hallway. Instead I saw County Commissioner Mike Hammond, who greeted me warmly and allowed me to step in to the area reserved for WIVK's meet and greet with Julianne. After Mike introduced me to Julianne, I spied Jimmy Holt, who I knew to be a good guy from my time working at WOKI. I offered to take a picture of him with Julianne if he would return the favor. I told Julianne that I used to work with her former dance partner Adam Carolla.



Julianne was in good voice as she sang selections from her self-titled album and her "Sounds of the Season" disc. I thought she sounded better than she did on the various television shows where I've seen her sing. We had a good view of the stage until Julianne sang "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" and asked everyone to stand. Those who were seated on the floor were very happy to get up and stretch their legs.



I've been a fan of Julianne since she first danced with the stars. I now have both her CDs and have already programmed the DVR to catch her on the annual "Christmas in Washington" special on the 17th.

what exit?

A highlight of NBC's holiday schedule is their annual broadcast of "Christmas in Rockefeller Center." I thought that this year's telecast was considerably better than last year and the year before. There were still some things to nitpick though. Al Roker said the tree lighting was the "official start of the holiday season." I'm almost positive he said the exact same thing about the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade last week. C'mon Al, pick one.

The "miracle tree" came from 74-year-old twins Bill and Bob Varanyak of Hamilton, New Jersey. They explained that their late mother fertilized the tree with a mixture of manure and water for many years after planting it in 1931.

"America's Got Talent" winner Neal E. Boyd got to sing during the 7pm hour, which is shown only on WNBC in New York. His performance of "O Holy Night" had too much vibrato for my taste. For the nationwide broadcast, all they let him do was introduce "American Idol" winner David Cook, who did a good job on John Lennon's "Happy Xmas." I like David Cook's voice but his version of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"on the pre-show wasn't that great, mostly because of his guitar playing and the way he "made it his own" by leaving out parts of the song. His guitar sounded like it was playing a different song than the one he was singing.

Faith Hill and Rascal Flatts made appearances on the telecast. I generally find country artists to be tolerable when they are singing Christmas standards. Faith did justice to "Little Drummer Boy" and "Joy to the World." Rascal Flatts was okay with "White Christmas." In fact, I preferred it over Harry Connick, Jr's jazz arrangement of "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year." My wife says I'm biased because it was too different from the way good old Andy Williams sings it.

I may be in the minority but I thought Miley Cyrus sounded good on "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree." It was the right song for her voice and was way better than the non-holiday song she did on the pre-show. It was fairly obvious that Cyrus, the Jonas Brothers and Beyonce pre-recorded their segments. Otherwise why would NBC stick them on a rooftop, away from the fans? Plus, the Jonas Brothers were on CBS minutes later in a live telecast from Los Angeles. I did like seeing St. Patrick's Cathedral in the background as Beyonce sang a song with a hint of "Ave Maria" in it. Co-host Jane Krakowski called it "her own personal version" of the hymn. As of last night, there were some comments on Beyonce's website complaining about her low-cut dress and the differences between her rendition and the actual "Ave Maria." After Jane Krakowski said that Beyonce's stage persona is "Sasha Fierce," Al Roker said that his was "Sir Gay Mild." Oh wait, maybe he meant "Sergei Mild."

The network did a good job of concealing Rosie O'Donnell's participation in the show. Britney Spears did less yet was promoted more. It was a surprise when Rosie showed up playing a bongo drum while her "Broadway Kids" lip-synced a song about Santa doing the mambo. Britney got a few seconds of screen time as she opened the show and teased the actual tree lighting prior to a commercial break.

Tony Bennett continues to make it sound easy when he sings. I can't believe he's 82 years old. I was also amazed to hear that "A Swingin' Christmas" is his first holiday album in 40 years.

I mentioned that the Jonas Brothers were in Los Angeles, not New York last night. They were present for "The Grammy Nominations Concert Live" on CBS. Mariah Carey opened that show with "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)." That song is one of my all-time favorites, especially the cover version by U2 and the original by Darlene Love. I wonder if Mariah has got a cold or if the song was not quite in her range. She didn't sound as good as usual. I think I'll click over to YouTube to see Darlene Love do the song on David Letterman's show.

rambling with Grambling

FutureMe.org is a website where you send messages to yourself in the future. I have inadvertently done the same thing with my blog. The other day I was looking at my reviews of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade from past few years when I stumbled upon a post that reminded me to record the Bayou Classic this afternoon.

The game between Grambling State and Southern was not the main attraction. As soon as we got home tonight, we fast forwarded right to the halftime show, better known as the Battle of the Bands. The drum majors for both schools began with an incredible limbo-like backward bend. The tops of their hats actually touch the ground.

Unfortunately NBC's audio mix was atrocious. In the background we could hear that each school had an announcer introducing the performance to the crowd in the stadium. Home viewers could not make out a word of it. The television microphones were placed so that only a portion of the instruments could be heard at any given time. Because the band members are constantly switching directions, it would be just about impossible to capture all the sound.

From the letters they formed on the field it looked like both bands might have been wrangling for an invitation to the Inaugural Parade. One of the bands also spelled out the letters BCFX. It wasn't until the commercial break after the halftime show that we saw how it referred to a new video game called Black College Football Experience, the Doug Williams Edition. In addition to the football, the video game has halftime shows and drumline competitions.

o tannen-boom

Knoxville Mayor Bill Haslam and Santa Claus lit the Christmas tree at the Regal Celebration of Lights tonight, the first big event in the annual Christmas in the City celebration. I was expecting the tree lights to come on, however the fireworks from Pyro Shows were a surprise. The fake snow they blasted out over the crowd could have been easily confused for ashes from the exploding shells above us.



The tree is just across Gay Street from the Regal Riviera. There were vendor booths and other activities throughout Krutch Park and into Market Square. Talented 12-year-old Logan Murrell was singing Christmas songs on the Market Square stage when my daughter and I came out of the new Rita's Ice store. I remember being impressed by Logan's voice two years ago when she was only 10. Her performance tonight reaffirmed my feeling that she will be even more successful in the future.



My daughter bought a coffee custard with fudge topping at Rita's. Instead of ice cream, I had a free cup of eggnog from Mayfield Dairy. Members of the Mayfield Mom Squad were handing out samples from the Flavor Force trailer. Earlier in the evening they gave out free Snow Cream popsicles. The Salvation Army offered free hot chocolate and the city gave away free marshmallows for roasting over a fire pit.



A vendor in one of the booths was selling marshmallow blowguns, which are painted pieces of PVC pipe. A miniature marshmallow goes in the mouth end of the gun and gains velocity as it travels through the barrel. A sign above the guns offers sage advice for life: "don't put mouth on blowgun until purchased."

never gonna give you up

The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade will always be a major part of my holiday. We could vary the dinner menu and I could miss a football game (as long as the Redskins aren't playing) but I cannot miss the parade and have it still feel like Thanksgiving.

Why does CBS bother to cover the parade each year? Better yet, why do I bother to watch? The broadcast is not in high definition, the camera angles are terrible, none of the bands or singers perform and the anchors often give erroneous information. For example, they said that Horton the Elephant was from Whoville, when everybody knows that all the Whos live in the speck of dust on the clover Horton carries.

Actually I do know why I tune in. I always hope to see additional coverage of the giant helium-filled balloons. This year CBS replaced Hannah Storm with Maggie Rodriguez who, like Hannah, referred to the balloons as "floats." She referred to the floats as "floats" as well. When a balloon did pass by, Maggie and co-anchor Dave Price would turn their backs to the camera to get a look. Can't say that I blame them for that.



Maggie and Dave seemed to spend more time interviewing random guests than describing the parade. Some of the celebrities who dropped by were Mayor Michael Bloomberg, Broadway star Roger Bart and singer Clay Aiken. A soap opera actress named Julie Pinson brought photos of the European vacation she and Maggie took together about eight years ago. Maggie revealed that she and Julie have blackmail-able photos of each other that were snapped on a beach in the south of France. I think we know what she means.

To truly enjoy the parade, you needed to watch the good-looking HD coverage on NBC and not pay attention to the corny scripted lines that Meredith Vieira and Matt Lauer were reading. They deviated from the script twice today that I noticed. Meredith got the stuffing scared out of her when the Keith Haring Heart balloon got too close and brushed their broadcast booth. We only heard her distress because the camera was already focused on the next entry. Later, there was some confusion over what paragraph to read when Andy Williams was about to perform. How come my man Andy didn't get a float or even a car to ride? I doubt they made an almost-81-year-old walk the parade route. If Andy did have a float that broke down, it might explain the mistake in the NBC booth.



Without question, the greatest moment of the parade was when the "Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends" float Rickrolled us viewers. NBC tried to spoil it twice by listing Rick Astley's name in the opening credits and by having Matt Lauer say, "watch carefully, we hear there is a special musical surprise." I had just called my wife into the room to hear the Friends' version of the theme from "The Courtship of Eddie's Father" when Astley interrupted with his '80s classic.



For the uninformed few among us, Rickrolling is an Internet sensation where you expect one thing but get Rick Astley. My friend Bean did a great job of explaining it on March 31 and then executing it on April 1 of this year.

I feel for the guy in the photo below. The good news is that he gets to be in the best parade in the country. The bad news is that he had to wear the most ridiculous costume and ride on the Jimmy Dean sausage float with some country singer. What's he supposed to be, a pat of butter?



Let's "dot dot dot" our way through the rest of my notes... my daughter heard that the Rockettes must all have the same length inseam... James Taylor's electric guitar looked like a really thin acoustic guitar... the NYPD band got ripped off when the network ran a recorded drum track instead of the band's audio... Shontelle almost fell off the Rhino Mountain float twice... the Clique Girlz send the exact opposite message I would want my children to get from a group targeting kids... there's an "Internet phenom" named Charice?... when these same balloons appear in the Macy's Holiday Parade at Universal Orlando Resort, do they get deflated and re-inflated every day?... did Varsity Fanclub take the place of the Cheetah Girls in the line of march?... my wife is happy because the best sounding band in the parade, the JMU Marching Royal Dukes, is from her alma mater... Al Roker apparently pulled some strings to get his kid aboard the Santa float... did I mention that the fools at CBS wasted the first ten minutes of their broadcast talking about nothing?

limited time only

Oprah may have cheated her studio audience out of all the usual goodies during her "Favorite Things for a Thrifty Holiday" show today but at least she put some freebies on her website for us all to download. Because I was napping, I didn't watch the show. Instead, I saw an online blurb mentioning that there was a Brian McKnight Christmas song available on Oprah.com for a 48 hour window after the broadcast. I was pleasantly surprised that there were actually eight songs I could download. In addition to McKnight's "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year," I grabbed holiday music from Faith Hill, Tony Bennett, Il Divo, Josh Groban, Amy Grant, Harry Connick Jr. and Aretha Franklin. Bennett and Connick also make a free iTunes song available on their websites until Monday.

And, as Ironside would say, "Happy Thanksgiving, Eve."

rock me Amadeus

After a successful Blogger Night last year, the Knoxville Symphony Orchestra is doing it again. This time around it will be at the Mozart & Mendelssohn concert (with a little Bach thrown in) on Thursday, January 15, 2009. I like that the KSO has embraced new media. In addition to the podcasts on their main site, they now have their own blog too.

The soloist that night will be Navah Perlman. If you think her name sounds familiar, you're right. When she got married, the announcement in the New York Times mentioned that "her father is the violinist." Not "a violinist" but "the violinist."

The same rules apply as last time. The first 50 49 bloggers who respond to Stephanie Burdette will get a pair of tickets in exchange for their willingness to post a blog entry about their experiences at the concert. Don't worry if you're not an expert in classical. Even the musically uninitiated will recognize Mendelssohn's "Italian" symphony. Several of the area's many great bloggers posted reviews of the concert last year. Take a look at what Krisha, Byron, Lissa, Tish and Doug wrote after getting exposed to some culture.

The deadline for emailing Stephanie is January 14 at 2:00 p.m. Once again bloggers should consider paying it forward by helping me to spread the word. Write something now and Include a link back to this post. Or you can just link to Stacy McCloud's boots if that's what you want.

goodness gracious

Here's a safe prediction: Derek and Julianne Hough could become the greatest brother and sister act since Donny & Marie. Their jive to "Great Balls of Fire" was the best performance in the history of "Dancing With the Stars." Even the music was better than normal. I loved all the horns in the arrangement. I've watched it several times and have not tired of it.

Julianne's triumphant return from surgery was made all the more impressive by the way she appeared from behind the lid of a grand piano. In fact the piano was a great prop, especially when Julianne danced on top of it and Derek slid under it. At least two people have posted the dance on YouTube (here and here) until ABC has it removed. The network does have the entire episode online in HD. I wish they would put up clips the way NBC does with "Saturday Night Live."

Julianne has become a celebrity in her own right. I think she's a bigger star than her dance partner this season, Cody Something. My guess is that Cody avoided elimination because viewers wanted to give Julianne another chance to dance. I felt similarly about her partnership with Adam Carolla.

I'm not a fan of country music but I will make an effort to swing by Target soon to pick up a copy of Julianne's Christmas CD. And yes, I am thinking about going downtown to the Christmas parade in which Julianne is scheduled to appear.

rocka top

If the management for Rockapella had asked me, I might have requested that they schedule their Knoxville concert for any night besides a Tuesday. Last year I wished that I could be in two places at once to see the renowned a capella group when they performed at George Mason University. This year they are coming to the University of Tennessee on the one night of the week that I am always booked.

While I wish that all of you would show up at Patrick Sullivan's this and every Tuesday to see the comedy improv of Einstein Simplified, I know that most of you won't. Perhaps you can go see Rockapella instead. They're so good that I'm kicking myself for not making any progress on bilocation.

long distance dedication

Neither the folks at Cupcakes Take the Cake nor I realized that tonight's episode of "Food Network Challenge: Cupcake" was a rerun from 2005 when writing our posts about the show. A comment posted on their site revealed the truth, which was verified with a few mouse clicks. I was also reminded that the contestant from Knoxville's MagPies Cakes used to be in a band called The Judybats.

Two weeks ago, when I programmed my DVR to record the Challenge, I got the idea to order a half-dozen cupcakes as a surprise for my daughter. They were delivered to her today. Before that could happen, I had to search online for bakeries in the Washington, DC area. The Washington Post recently rated the best cupcakes in their area.

The currently popular Hello Cupcake doesn't yet offer delivery service. Lily Lane Cakes had a nice website but the proprietor told me she was totally booked for the weekend. Signature Cupcakes eliminated themselves from contention with their steep $13 delivery charge and one-dozen minimum.

I eventually ordered from CandyCups Cupcakes. Their delivery charge was only $5 and the cupcakes were reasonably priced. Best of all, they could decorate the tops with floral designs my daughter would like. I expected the flowers to be drawn on with icing from a pastry bag. As you can see in the photo below, they used gum paste to make some nice three-dimensional flowers instead.

cookin' with gas

The new Christmas lights are on in Gatlinburg. By switching to LED bulbs, the four-month display will use the same amount of electricity as only three nights of the old incandescent bulbs. The Smoky Mountain city held its 19th annual Winter Magic Kickoff and Chili Cook-off this evening.



The headline entertainment was an incarnation of The Coasters. I doubt that there were any original members among the four guys we saw but they put on a good show nevertheless.



I was there to shoot some video for a feature called The Frank Files on the radio station's website. Inspired by the "Mascot Mondays" that I wrote about here over two years ago, I even tried dancing with a few of the costumed characters at the festival. With any luck, it will look funny on camera.

na na hey hey

The Olympics and our road trip to Branson and Arkansas must have distracted me from the interesting Catholic news that was released in mid-August. The two local priests I asked about it hadn't heard either. Maybe if the Diocese of Knoxville had a bishop, the information would have trickled down to us. My wife and I finally got tipped off when Fr. Gary Braun mentioned it after Mass last Sunday while we were in St. Louis.

The Vatican has decided that we are to no longer use the name Yahweh in prayers or songs during Mass. Or as one blog put it, "Ixnay on the Yahweh." The four Hebrew letters that represent Yahweh, YHWH, are known as the Tetragrammaton and are meant to be unpronounceable. Fr. Ragan Schriver explained to us tonight that the four consonants were combined with the vowels from "Adonai" to create the word "Jehovah" (or Jahovah).

Upon hearing the news, my wife immediately thought about all the times she sang "You Are Near" at funerals and other Masses. The hymn begins "Yahweh, I know you are near." That song was also part of my father's funeral all those years ago. As we walked to the car, we tried to think of a few two-syllable options to replace "Yahweh," including "Father" and "Abba." My wife soon came up with a better idea: "O Lord."

Dan Schutte, the composer of "You Are Near," has written about the process of revising his famous hymn. After he "jotted down pages of possibilities" and consulted with friends and colleagues, his official revision is... "O Lord, I know you are near."

The first verse of Schutte's "Sing a New Song" now says "Shout for gladness! Dance for joy!" instead of "Yahweh's people dance for joy." The change for his "Yahweh, the Faithful One" will be more challenging, if not impossible.

music that makes you feel good

The Christmas music playing in our car was there for a reason. We were driving through Kentucky and Illinois on our way to visit with several family members this past weekend. My wife was listening to the practice CD for a Christmas cantata called "Journey of Promises" by Joseph M. Martin. The choir at All Saints Catholic Church will perform the piece on January 16 and 18. My wife sings with the choir. I've been asked to read one of the spoken word parts.

When the CD ended, I scanned the FM dial for a station. The first one we heard was playing "The Chanukah Song" by Adam Sandler. It took a moment for this to register. It was October 23, two days shy of two months before the Jewish holiday. The next song was a Christmas standard. There were no deejays, just some sweepers identifying the station as Christmas 101.1 (although their website now calls it Holiday 101.1).

I eventually figured out that we were listening to WMVN, the former Movin 101.1 out of St. Louis. What was really surprising is that the station switched to the seasonal format back on October 10th. They're just biding their time until they go all-sports in January.

Sean Ross of Edison Media Research mentioned the format change in two postings. He writes that there have been far fewer stations making changes this fall than last. He also lists ten songs he heard the St. Louis station play on their online stream.

If you want Christmas music that goes beyond the same old versions of the same old songs, be sure to check out my friend Bean's site, Christmas Music Everyday.

change is just around the corner

During the heated political campaigns of my youth, I would ride my bicycle down to the local Republican and Democrat headquarters to get free campaign buttons for my collection. Amidst all the Nixon, McGovern, Ford and Carter pins that I stored in a huge maraschino cherry jar from Baskin-Robbins were my two of my favorite buttons: "Wally Ballou for Mayor" and "Wintergreen for President." Both are fictional candidates. Wally Ballou was a creation of radio greats Bob & Ray. John P. Wintergreen is the lead character in a musical by George & Ira Gershwin and George S. Kaufman & Morrie Ryskind.

"Of Thee I Sing" is about a presidential candidate who knew he was unelectable based on the issues and decided to run on emotion instead. His advisers choose a one-word platform that, "everybody's interested in and that doesn't matter a damn!" John P. Wintergreen was swept into office on a platform of "love." The satirical show features songs such as "Love Is Sweeping the Country" and "Who Cares?"

My wife and I took in a student performance of the Gershwin musical while visiting with family members over the weekend. I knew I had seen a televised production of the play back in the '70s but could not recall any of the plot points or songs. As I watched the students sing and dance, I kept trying to remember who played those same parts in the TV version. The president was easy. I could picture Carroll O'Connor's face on my Wintergreen campaign button. However his running mate, Alexander Throttlebottom, and his First Lady, Mary Turner, stumped me. The young lady we saw playing Mary had a beautiful, operatic singing voice.

Thankfully IMDB came to my rescue. Throttlebottom was played by Jack Gilford, who I mainly remember from some old Cracker Jack commercials. During the play I kept thinking that Wintergreen's wife was played by another television star, maybe even O'Connor's "All in the Family" costar Jean Stapleton. However her off-key singing as Edith Bunker made me think it had to be someone else. Still, I was quite surprised to find out that the lovely Mary Turner was played by the same woman dancing across my TV tonight, Cloris Leachman.

in the course of human events

Should any of us be surprised that Neal E. Boyd won "America's Got Talent" last night? His audition segment seemed to be lifted, almost shot for shot, from that of the winner of "Britain's Got Talent." Earlier in the summer, I saw a promo for AGT that was practically identical to the clip of Paul Potts that I linked to last year. Because I didn't watch the show often enough to hear him sing anything beside "Nessum Dorma," my opinion is probably slanted. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for Neal and glad that he won, even if his prize is less than you think. I'm just a bit cynical about the similarities between the two operatic amateurs.