so many contenders

One of the friends we visited in Saugerties over the summer didn't plan on buying me a second Christmas present this year. However he couldn't resist the item he saw at an auction house. He had read my blog post about the late, great Ed McMahon and knew I would love an autographed picture of the legendary broadcaster.



The salutation reads "For the gang at S.M.C., All the best!" I wonder what S.M.C. stands for. Considering that the photo was purchased in New York State, I think a likely candidate would be SMC Stone. It could also be from SMC Furnishings, the Systems, Man & Cybernetics Society or the Snowsports Merchandising Corporation. Maybe Ed supported either an organization called Single Mothers by Choice or the Sacred Music Chorale of Richmond Hill. How could I forget the Black Irish chapter of the Shamrocks Motorcycle Club?

stingray sold separately

The challenge in finding a Christmas gift for my friend Bean is getting something unusual that he doesn't have. One year I was at the Post Office and saw a CD of Christmas music he would enjoy. He already had it. Last year I saw a unique Santa figurine in a wig shop on Gay Street. It was perfect.



A few weeks ago my family and I went out to dinner with a friend on Market Square. Afterward, we browsed in some of the shops. A certain package in Earth to Old City grabbed my attention. I don't know if the Steve Irwin action figure was made before or after the adventurer's death but I couldn't resist buying it for Bean.

let's go to the pearly gates

George Michael was George Michael before the Wham! guy came along. Like the singer, the George Michael I knew had a real last name that wasn't radio-friendly. Because I remember how mad he got when The Washington Post printed it, I will respect his memory and omit it here.

George died today after a two-year battle with leukemia. He was one of the best deejays ever to grace the airwaves, most notably at WFIL. I remember hearing him at WABC when I was in high school. He was also the best local sportscaster I've ever seen. I'm not talking about play-by-play or color commentators, I mean the guys in the trenches squeezing as many highlights as possible into their allotted time on the evening news.

George moved to the Washington area a month or so before I did. For me, he always was the face of sports in the nation's capital. His enthusiasm is also partly responsible for my conversion to being a Redskins fan. My friends who interned at WRC confirmed all reports that George was a tough but fair boss. His off-air perfectionism is what allowed him to seem relaxed on the air.

My first full-time job in broadcasting was at WAVA. Our general manager, Alan Goodman, knew a good thing when he saw it and signed George to provide sports reports three times a week during the morning show. It was my job to call George and tell him that we were ready for his segment. He had a microphone in his house that was connected to our studios via a dedicated phone line.

Once a year, I think around Thanksgiving or Christmas, George would come in and play deejay. We would toss our morning zoo format and play oldies not normally heard on WAVA. And by we, I mean George and me. Unlike most deejays, George did not run his own board. He was major-market all the way and was accustomed to having a board op. I would load up the tunes and wait for George to point at me to hit the button. He had a hand signal for me to turn on his mic and another to start the next record. I'm using the old-school term but I actually played his oldies off CD.

There was one particular song that George insisted on playing every time. He would call me a couple of times in the days leading up to his appearance to make sure that I would have "Come and Get Your Love" by Redbone. Excuse me for a moment while I listen to the intro that George loved talking up.

Come and Get Your Love - Redbo...

WRC-TV has posted a retrospective, much of which was also shown when George retired from his nightly duties in 2007. I found several other good links on the @redskinsblog Twitter feed. As you gather with your family this Christmas Eve, take a moment to say a prayer for the repose of the soul of George Michael. Rest in peace sir, rest in peace.

called home

The death of Oral Roberts will make most people think of the time in 1987 when he said he was going to die. I am no exception. When my phone buzzed with the Twitter message from Celebrity Death Beeper, I immediately thought of my trip to Oklahoma.

After Rev. Roberts announced that the Lord would take him if he didn't raise enough money, Don & Mike began a countdown to his anticipated death date. As we got closer, someone suggested that it would be funny to broadcast live from the gates of Oral Roberts University. It sounds like something The Daily Show would do if it happened today.

Don & Mike, our engineer Chip and I flew to Tulsa and checked in to a hotel not far from the huge statue of praying hands. Chip had arranged for a satellite uplink truck to meet us there for the broadcast. That's when people started getting nervous. Our intention was to do the show from the hotel parking lot. The management refused to allow the satellite truck on their property. We were told that Rev. Roberts owned the land under the hotel.

With our fancy, expensive satellite broadcast scrapped, all we could do was phone it in. My friend Bean and Shadow Smith anchored the show back at WAVA. Don & Mike called the studio from their hotel rooms. To add some local flavor, I went to a nearby Waffle House, talked with some customers and then called in a report from a pay phone. It was the first time I had ever been to a Waffle House, a feat I didn't repeat until 15 years later when I moved to Knoxville.

Ober reaction

Comedian Ken Ober, best known as host of "Remote Control," was found dead Sunday. I had the good fortune of knowing Ken when he worked at the Comedy World Radio Network.



In the mid '90s, Ken co-hosted a show on KLSX with Susan Olsen. A few years later, they both worked at Comedy World although on different shows. While most of the programs needed time to find their legs, "The Ken Ober Radio Hour" sounded good from day one. He surrounded himself with funny people like Lou DiMaggio and Charles Zucker.

When news of Ken's passing first started popping up on the Internet, some debunked it as a hoax. Sadly it turned out to be true. My friend Susan was distressed by the conflicting reports. After the death was confirmed she wrote several things on Facebook, including: "Most agree it seems Ken Ober was in a good place in his life before passing. There's some consolation in that. He was a great guy to work with, I'm so glad I saw him recently." A little later she posted: "Well maybe Kenny is having a cocktail with Ed McMahon and busting his chops for introducing him on Star Search as 'Can Opener.'"

On the day of the O.J. Simpson verdict, Susan brought a camera to work. She put together a 9½ minute video of what went on in the KLSX studios and hallways. Like most of us, Ken's reaction was pure outrage. His language on the tape is definitely NSFW. In our current times, it is amazing to see that so many people once worked at a single radio station. You might recognize the Regular Guys, Kato Kaelin and Mother Love.

There are many comments on the web about how Ken was as nice as he was talented. I can tell you from first hand experience that it was a genuine pleasure to be around him.

belly of a whiskered beast

The recent death of Vic Mizzy had many TV critics reminiscing about the good old days of TV theme songs. I saw one website with a list of the best current themes, which included some of my favorites, "Curb Your Enthusiasm," "The Office" and "Dexter."

At the screenings of the no-budget horror film "Fish Bait" over the weekend, I was pleasantly surprised to hear a theme song over the closing credits. Jeffrey Joslin, son of director Jeff Joslin, is a singer-songwriter based in Murfreesboro. Jeffrey appears in the film, entertaining at a party scene. For the end credits, he composed a song called "Fish Bait" that mentions the fictional Fear Hollow Marina and the big catfish my character hopes to catch.

body farmville

There's no room at the Body Farm. The shocking news was in The Tennessean this week. The Vanderbilt School of Medicine has also stopped accepting cadavers. The increased demand is attributed to a larger number of people who can't afford a traditional burial or cremation.

A publicly funded burial isn't the only option for families faced with insurmountable funeral expenses. Donating a body to scientific or medical research is free and, in the age of forensic-sleuthing shows like CSI, somewhat glamorous.

The forensics program is attempting to raise $400,000 to build a new research building and add another acre to the Body Farm, which would allow space for even more cadaver donations in the future.

Until the expansion, what should they do with all the people who want their bodies to skeletonize naturally? Here are a few comedic suggestions to get us started. Add your own funny ideas in the comments section.

• Use them as incredibly realistic Halloween decorations in Sequoyah Hills
• Hide one or two in the visitor's locker room at Neyland Stadium
• Put some in kudzu-infested areas so volatile fatty acids can kill the weeds
• Place man dressed as Hank Williams outside the Andrew Johnson building
• Stage world's largest "Weekend at Bernie's" tribute at next AdventureCon

a matter of life and death

Capital punishment has been the main topic of discussion in Knoxville recently. The first of the trials of the accused killers of Channon Christian and Chris Newsom concluded today. The disgusting, horrific crimes have grabbed the attention of East Tennesseeans to such a degree that jurors had to be selected from the Nashville area. Letalvis Cobbins was eligible for the death penalty after being convicted of first degree murder. The jury sentenced him to life in prison without the possibility of parole.

Social networks are buzzing with news updates and opinions on the trial. I couldn't help but notice that many of my Facebook friends were very vocal about their desire to see Cobbins sentenced to death. On more mundane political issues, I usually agree with their views. However I was moved to post the following status update: "My unpopular opinion: glad for the guilty verdicts for Cobbins but still opposed to the death penalty. My FB friends want an execution."

I found out that not all my Facebook friends support capital punishment. While the jury was deliberating the sentence, I received several great comments from both points of view that are worth reading now and re-reading as each of the other defendants face their juries. I will refer to the author of each comment by first initial only. However if any of them contact me and ask that their names be used, I will happily revise the post to identify them.

A: The death penalty is not something to be taken lightly. I don't side with you on this one (well, glad for the guilty verdicts), but I can respect anyone with a different opinion on an execution. That's a touchy subject.

R: The government can't manage to run a car buy back program effectively. Why on earth should we trust them with the power of life and death?

N: The Government does not have the "power" to execute this trash, the jury and judge do. And they are us.
Frank, look at it from another angle, with children and good people going hungry, why waste the thousands upon thousands of dollars, housing this animal? Compassion is not "babysitting" this animal for the next 50 to 60 years, it is taking that needed energy and money and helping victims of them.

J: If a person commits a crime and is caught and convicted they forfeit their liberty. If the crime is truly horrific they forfeit their life. The state may be the instrument of their death but the responsibility lies with the perpetrator of the crime. That's how I see it and I think this crime certainly qualifies for the death penalty.

S: Count me among the FB friends that do NOT want an execution. Do you have a link for the back story on Cobbins? I don't know the case.

Frank: The details of this horrific case will turn your stomach.
http://www.knoxnews.com/news/news/local/channon-christian-christopher-newsom-murders/

R: Do judges and juries get things wrong? Do prosecutors engage in misconduct? Are cases pushed or dropped for political reasons? If the answer to any of these questions is "Yes," then our criminal justice system does not perform to the standard required to allow it to take a life.

N: No, the judge and jury did not get THIS case wrong!

T: Well, the problem with your argument is that it costs far more to exhaust the appeals process than to simply house a convict. Also, it's disingenuous to not recognize the jury and the judge are merely arms of the state.
The US Constitution, however, clearly contemplates the death the penalty ("no person shall be deprived of life ...."). Of course, the US Constitution is a floor, not a ceiling, so each state can decide the issue. Still, the death penalty is an ancient and barbaric practice that provides no deterrence and should be abolished.

S: No offense to N, I don't know you.... But one of the fundamental flaws with humanity is the ability to allow a desire for revenge to cloud judgment. If you didn't sit on the jury and hear all of the evidence in the case, you are making an opinion based judgment rather than a fact based judgment. While he hasn't stated such as yet, I would guess that Frank's opposition to the DP is that only God can truly judge the actions of man. Only God has all the facts and only God can claim the right to judge who should live or die.

R: I supported the death penalty for a long time. I reasoned that if I'm willing to take a life in order to defend my own, then the state should be allowed to do the same, take a life to defend the group.
Then I realized that was a flawed comparison. For example, I have the right to use lethal force to defend myself when attacked, or to defend another who is being attacked. I don't have the right to kill somebody because they attacked me yesterday, or might attack somebody tomorrow. And if I don't have the right, then why should I give it to the state?
Particularly when the state has not demonstrated the level of competence required to handle such an imposing responsibility.

N: Disingenuous? Lets read the rest of the sentence together. "No person shall be deprived of life, liberty or property without due process of the law". Also, Sometimes the appeals process is used to stop justice from being completed.
S, I am sorry that you think justice is revenge. I assume that like me you are not on this jury, correct? Then your opinion is also not a fact based judgment? That is why it is called a discussion. God? God did not take Channon's life, this man did.
I am not arrogant enough to suggest what Frank believes, I merely suggested another view. Frank is a good friend and I will stand by him.
What is breaking my heart is that there is more disdain for me in my beliefs than the monster that committed this unparalleled crime.
I must now go back to work so I can help feed this trash for the next 20 to 60 years, so I will be unable and unwilling to comment any further, so say what you will.

AB: The only reason I oppose the death penalty is because we cannot guarantee that no innocent life will be lost. As soon as one innocent person is killed, the whole system has/is failed.

S: I didn't say that justice was revenge. I said that the desire for revenge can cloud judgment (clear reasoning). I also didn't make a statement about the outcome of the case, you did. My point was that people who aren't involved intimately with the case don't have enough information to say if the defendant is guilty or innocent. Your statement that the jury didn't make a mistake was an overstatement because you didn't have the same information as they did.
As for Frank, I was merely extrapolating on his previously expressed Catholicism. I would never say that I spoke on his behalf. I was just pointing out that for some people (like PERHAPS Frank) this is a religious issue and should be respected as such.

T: The purpose of the appeals process is to, hopefully, ensure that the law, including procedural issues, is followed and applied correctly. You either agree to adhere to our civil liberties or you don't. I'm unclear why your being pissy with me. While I disagree with the death penalty, clearly, the US Constitution contemplates that someone can be put to death. What you were being disingenuous about was saying the "government can't put someone to death." Of course, the government -- more appropriately the State -- can put someone to death. The Constitution says so.

L: With the exception of self-defense or defense of another, it is not the province of man to mete out decisions of life or death. That said, I think those that perpetrated the horrific torture on those two kids deserve to have the same treatment done to them. But it is not our place to make it so.

Frank: I appreciate and respect all your comments, on both sides of the issue. Obviously my Catholicism is a big factor in my opposition to the death penalty. To me, capital punishment is the Old Testament way of thinking.
However, I used to feel differently. It changed when Ted Bundy was executed. I got a sick feeling in my stomach and realized that his death would do nothing to bring back the victims he killed.
The arguments about the cost of death row legal appeals and the possibility of executing even one innocent man are powerful to me. Ultimately I think killing is wrong, whether done by a criminal or by the government or by a doctor.

AB: The Catholic Church does not consider the death penalty to be intrinsically evil, nor limited to any particular era or dispensation. However, it does not support the death penalty in a society that has other means to effectively suppress the offender. So according to the Church, it isn't a proper option in the vast majority of cases, if not all cases, in the western world.

long division

Fr. Gary Braun was kind enough to visit with my wife and me when he was in Knoxville last March. He attended the ordination and installation of Bishop Richard F. Stika. In fact, when one of the local TV stations showed file footage of the ceremony during the Bishop's recent hospitalization, Fr. Gary's face turned up on screen.

We've gotten to know Fr. Gary a little bit over the past year. He seems as morbidly interested in the Body Farm and other aspects of death as I am. Knowing that I would attend his parish in St. Louis this weekend, I couldn't wait to ask him about an unusual funeral.

A young man in his 20s passed away unexpectedly. His body wasn't found for a few days. His parents, who are divorced, decided to have him cremated and to have a Catholic funeral. At the funeral, there were two regular size urns and two smaller ones. The deceased's ashes had been split amongst the four containers. Each parent was going to put an urn in a columbarium and keep a little one at home as a souvenir. I was curious to ask Fr. Gary about the Catholic teaching on such a case.

Fr. Gary was surprised that a Catholic priest would allow such funeral to take place. The remains are supposed to be kept together and given the same respect as a body. I speculated that maybe the priest didn't know about the separated ashes until after the funeral director showed up at the church with the four containers. I imagined a more strict priest going to get a big funnel to reunite the ashes before continuing with the funeral.

I wonder what percentage of people realize that the cremation itself reduces you to brittle bones that still look a lot like a skeleton. As I learned in a lecture by Dr. Bill Bass, the bones are run through a pulverizer to create the dust we think of as "ashes."

At least the family in question used traditional receptacles. I recently read about some horrific urns shaped to look like the dead person's head, without hair. All they need is a couple of photographs from different angles. The eyes are disturbing. The sample shown online stares blankly through you. Perhaps most troubling is the obvious line that separates the lid from the rest of the cookie jar urn. If your dead loved one isn't attractive enough, you can put their bone dust into a replica of a celebrity's head.

focus on the family

The recognizable voice of John Waters was on NPR this afternoon when I got in my car. I knew that I knew the voice but it still took me a minute to identify it. When I tune in to the middle of an interview, I like to play "guess the guest," a game made possible because so many of us in radio are bad about identifying interviewees once the conversation has begun.

In today's case, it was a trifle more challenging because Waters was not talking about himself but about the Tate/LaBianca murders. Apparently he has befriended Leslie Van Houten, a member of the Manson family who was convicted of the murders of Mr. and Mrs. LaBianca. Waters says that Van Houten has been rehabilitated in prison and should be paroled.

The broadcast was timed to coincide with the 40th anniversary of the murders, which took place August 9 and 10, 1969, a mere three weeks after a much happier event. While looking online for another link, I found a blog that commemorates the murders. It has a lot of recent entries because of the anniversary but was actually started over four years ago.

I remember reading "Helter Skelter" while in grammar school. Years later when I met Vincent Bugliosi at KLOS, I told him that I still had a vivid memory of a crime scene photo in the book. In it, Leno LaBianca's body was whited out but a fork was still visible protruding from his abdomen.

My friend Lisa Burks, who writes "Adventures in Grave Hunting" among other blogs, sent me a DVD titled "The Six Degrees of Helter Skelter." It is hosted by her friend Scott Michaels of Dearly Departed Tours and FindADeath.com. Scott serves as tour guide and takes the viewer to the crime scenes, the homes of the other victims and more significant locations. The most effective parts of the film are when he retraces the steps of the murderers.

I found Scott's trip to Barker Ranch in Death Valley to be especially creepy. I was also surprised to learn that Sharon Tate and her friends ate their last meal at El Coyote, one of my favorite Mexican restaurants during the time I lived in California. It wasn't until I moved to Tennessee and started watching "The Beverly Hillbillies" reruns that I appreciated Sharon Tate's talent as an actress.

the way it was

Walter Cronkite defined the role of anchorman. The iconic newsman died tonight at 92. When I see clips of his career on TV or the Internet, I wish that my parents had watched him more often. They were partial to John Chancellor on NBC and the Huntley-Brinkley Report before that.

Cronkite will always be most associated with his coverage of President Kennedy's assassination and of Apollo 11. As the 40th anniversary of the historic lunar landing approaches, I've been thinking about that night. We were on vacation and the only channel we could get happened to be an ABC affiliate.

I got Walter Cronkite's autograph twice. One year, my father took us to the Robert F. Kennedy Pro-Celebrity Tennis Tournament at Forest Hills. I asked several famous people to sign a program. Somebody else, who got more signatures than I did, is selling a signed program for $3,500.

When I was in college at GMU, a friend and I waited in line at a record store in Georgetown to get Cronkite's signature on a vinyl album set he had released. I remember that he advised my friend to major in something other than journalism if she wanted to be a journalist. Many network correspondents have law degrees or other areas of expertise.

CBS will air a tribute to Cronkite on Sunday at 7:00 p.m. I'll be setting my DVR to record it, how about you?

east ender

Because we had a reservation, we had to make sure we got from Newport to New London in time to catch the 6:00 p.m. Cross Sound Ferry to Orient Point. The boat was almost exactly the same as the ferry we took from Bridgeport to Port Jefferson on our road trip two years ago. This time we also took two smaller ferries to get us from Greenport to Shelter Island to North Haven. From there, it's a short drive to Sag Harbor and Noyac.

Once we were on Long Island, I tuned the car radio to the so-bad-it’s-good WLNG, which does stream online if you want to hear it for yourself. Rusty Potz would ask a TV trivia question, start a song and then interrupt the song a moment later to say "we have a winner, no more calls please."

I was saddened to hear of the passing of 92.1 WLNG's legendary Paul Sidney. Somehow I find it appropriate that he died on April Fool's Day. Or, depending on who you ask, April 2, which was the 92nd day of the year.

When my wife and I honeymooned in the Hamptons, Paul gave us a tour of Broadcast House and then gave us a ride in their newest mobile unit. He drove us to Main Street in Sag Harbor where Alan Alda was filming a scene from "Sweet Liberty." I had a chance to tell Alda that my father knew him when they were both enrolled at Fordham University. In subsequent years, we would vacation in the Hamptons and go see Paul at the Southampton Fourth of July parade. Long Island won't be the same without him.

the rain in Maine stays plainly on the brain

Quick, who was Knoxville named after? I thought I knew and should have stuck to my guns when I was told I was wrong.

Rain and a cold wind dampened our plans to visit the Maine beaches on Tuesday. Instead we drove along Route 1 toward Rockland, looking for interesting stuff. I saw in the AAA Tourbook that we would be passing by Montpelier, the General Henry Knox Museum. Why not stop there and learn about the man our city and county were named after, or so I thought.



The museum is a replica of the Knox family home. It was built around 1930 to house the family's original furniture, which was donated by the general's great, great grandson. During the tour we learned that General Knox weighed about 300 pounds and died three days after swallowing a chicken bone. He was only 56. The docent said the bone punctured his insides.

A second tour guide, who resembled the late Burt Mustin, seemed especially knowledgeable about the Knox family. He said that he sat at home in his recliner thinking about what he would tell his tour groups that day. I asked what he knew about the general's connection with Knoxville. The Revolutionary War general had never been to Tennessee, he said. That sounded familiar to me. Then the guide said that Knoxville was named after John Knox not Henry Knox. He also claimed that John Knox was the first governor of Tennessee, which isn't true either. Now unsure of myself, I left dejectedly.

It was hours before we got to our next hotel and I could check the Internet. I tried not to wake my wife as I excitedly showed my son the Wikipedia entry for Henry Knox. Just to be sure I checked the City of Knoxville website too. Both agreed that K-Town was named for big Hank. You can be sure that I will contact the General Henry Knox museum in Thomaston to set them straight.

dying to get in

The recent spate of celebrity deaths has me thinking about two segments I did on the Comedy World Radio Network. I had the first interview with Tony Orciuoli about his then-new website, CelebrityDeathBeeper.com. Tony wrote a program that will automatically email you when news of a celebrity death crosses the wire. Longtime blog readers might recall me writing about this in February, 2006. I sent a copy of the interview to Tony right after it aired. He put the mp3 file on his website, which I downloaded so I can post it here for your convenience.



My interview with a guy named Death Pool Dave helped me land a job in Knoxville. Of all the airchecks I sent to my potential future bosses at 100.3 The River, the one they mentioned to me was my conversation with Death Pool Dave. He would register with several death pool websites including the Lee Atwater Invitational. Dave won quite a bit of money by guessing which celebrities would die in a calendar year. The younger the star, the more points they were worth in the game. To determine the point value, subtract the celebrity's age from 100. I looked through some old discs last night and found a copy of the CD I had sent to The River. Here's the interview with Death Pool Dave from late 2000 or early 2001.

mr. everybody

Shows like "America's Got Talent" and "Last Comic Standing" provide a showcase for two art forms that were more popular when I was a kid than they are today. Ventriloquists and impressionists also each got a tongue-in-cheek tribute week on the "Late Show with David Letterman."

Impressionist Fred Travalena died on Sunday. He appeared on Letterman's show a few years back. While on the surface he appeared to be one of those cheesy "luv ya babe, I mean it" celebrities, his actions proved he was a genuinely good guy. I always enjoyed seeing him when he would stop by WAVA to plug a gig in D.C. He was a gracious guest who managed to not step on the toes of co-host Mike O'Meara, who is a talented impressionist himself. Fred even came by the station when he had a private gig that didn't need any radio promotion.

At some point yesterday, they removed the "upcoming appearances" from Fred's website. It had previously listed gigs on July 31 at the Hoover Auditorium in Ohio, an Alaskan Cruise in September and a concert at Ruth Eckerd Hall in Florida on December 14.

I got the feeling that Fred would have liked to be in the Rat Pack but he was about 25 years too young. Instead he did impressions of Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Sammy Davis, Jr. among others. A lot of Fred's other impressions were of his elders, like George Burns and Groucho Marx.

The sad news about Fred's passing was announced by his long-time publicist, Roger Neal. Roger is a good guy too. When I was between jobs, he would have me do some odd jobs around Hollywood for him. I will always appreciate his kindness.

busy as Bourke Street

With all that happened lately, I didn't have an opportunity to share a photo of my birthday lunch. We'll get to that after a quick update on some of the things from last week. Deacon Patrick-Murphy Racey has posted a slide show of images from the funeral for Nancy and Peter Feist. It's impressive for me to see four bishops at my home parish.

Both Jack Lail and Michael Silence linked to my blog post about Michael Jackson and Elvis. Silence also linked to the picture of my birthday cupcakes. The photo turned out fairly well, if I say so myself.

Now that we're back on the topic, it's a family tradition to have lobster on my birthday. On Monday, I had a "cold water lobster tail" (probably Australian) and some sugar snap peas at Connor's.



While it was still very good, it wasn't from a true Maine lobster. Fortunately, I'll be able to get one of those when I go to Maine.

two kings

Someone should write a book comparing the lives and deaths of Michael Jackson and Elvis Presley. The early news reports I heard failed to see the obvious similarities. Both were the absolute biggest things in all of music and all of pop culture during their heyday. Both fell into a weird, isolated decline. Both looked completely different in their later years. Both deaths were originally said to be "cardiac arrest." CNN is reporting that Michael, like Elvis, had problems with prescription medications.

Former Jackson publicist Michael Levine issued the following statement via his LBN E-lert: "As someone who served as Michael Jackson's publicist during the first child molestation incident, I must confess I am not surprised by today's tragic news. Michael has been on an impossibly difficult and often self-destructive journey for years. His talent was unquestionable but so too was his discomfort with the norms of the world. A human simply can not withstand this level of prolonged stress."

Although he had already died, Elvis was technically Michael's father-in-law for a while. I was sitting in the audience at Radio City Music Hall during the MTV Video Music Awards when Michael and Lisa Marie Presley walked on stage and kissed. I got to go to the VMAs each year when I worked at KROQ.

In the late '80s, I had an even closer encounter with Michael Jackson. He came to the D.C. area to accept an award. I don't recall exactly how I got an invitation to cover the event. I was told to rent a tuxedo and bring a tape recorder. I drove to a multi-million dollar home in McLean. I parked off-site and took a shuttle to the party. The members of the press were ushered into a smaller building that was probably a garage or carriage house. A large room had been set up as if for a press conference. I was told to plug my tape recorder into a mult box, which provided an audio feed to the camera crews. While we waited for Michael to arrive, I struck up a fun conversation with Ann L. Trebbe, who was then a reporter for The Washington Post. She later went to work for USA Today. Michael stepped to the podium and made some brief generic remark like "I love you all, thank you very much." Don & Mike would play that audio for years anytime Michael's name came up.

After the worthless press event, the media representatives were allowed to go next door to the party. We were all dressed in formal wear, after all. The room buzzed when Michael made his entrance. He walked through the crowd, saying hello in his shy way to party goers who had paid top dollar to be there. As he got close to me, I reached out my hand and told him that I was with the local top-40 station, WAVA. I saw a change in his demeanor as his gloved hand shook mine very firmly and he said in a normal voice, "Thank you for your support."

I was working the afternoon shift at Star 102.1 on Thursday when TMZ.com reported that Michael had died. When I turned on the microphone, I wasn't totally sure what I was going to say. I said the date a couple of times and then said that the news I was about to deliver was as big as the death of Elvis was to the listeners' parents or perhaps grandparents.

higher than the sky, deeper than the ocean

The double funeral for Nancy and Peter Feist on Wednesday was one of the most impressive I've ever attended. One archbishop and three bishops were present in addition to dozens of priests and religious. Nancy was the executive assistant to both the current and the previous bishop of Knoxville.

Nancy collapsed on Friday at the Concord Farragut baseball field while her son was at bat. The CPR they performed on her may be what kept her unborn baby alive long enough to be delivered at the hospital. Fr. Augustine Idra gave the child an emergency baptism. Little Peter died shortly thereafter. Fr. Ragan Schriver held Peter's body as the family dealt with the tragedy.

The Rose Mortuary was packed with people on Tuesday night. The line to get into the chapel snaked through every hallway. Inside the chapel, Archbishop Joseph Kurtz led a rosary service from a podium behind the open casket containing mother and son. There were pauses between decades for Archbishop Kurtz and others to offer reflections on Nancy's life. Fr. David Boettner told how Nancy would edit letters and speeches for the priests, always changing the text into the Footlight font. Fr. David said the font, like Nancy's editing, gave the text "a theatrical sparkle." Fr. Peter Iorio said Nancy had named him one of her "apostles of joy." He read some messages she had written on the religious calendar she gave him.

Bishop Richard Stika was the main celebrant of the funeral Mass. Archbishop Kurtz, Bishop James Vann Johnston of Springfield and Bishop David Choby of Nashville concelebrated. The highlight was a poignant, eloquent, articulate reflection by Nancy's daughter. Hope Feist brought almost every mother in the church to tears with her recollections of her Mommy. She spoke directly to her siblings, her father and her grandparents about the boundless love her mother had for all of them. She told each of them that "Mom will never stop loving you." Bishop Stika said it was the best eulogy he had heard in his 24 years of priesthood.

Considering how big a deal this was in the Catholic world, I was surprised that I didn't see any cameras or reporters from the mainstream media at the funeral home or the church. Deacon Patrick Murphy-Racey took pictures, which I hope will be posted online soon.

After Mass, Archbishop Kurtz told me that my blog entry about Nancy had turned up in the Google Alert he has for his own name. I told this to Bishop Stika and suggested that he too sign up for a Google Alert. I think it's a helpful tool for everyone in this day and age, but a necessity for public figures like them.

if you look up sidekick in the dictionary...

When Johnny Carson retired, Ed McMahon still had to work. Some of that may have been for the money but much of it was for the love of doing it. With Johnny stepping out of the limelight, Ed had a chance to be the center of attention as host of "Star Search," a show he tirelessly promoted.

Ed's financial problems and health problems inspired me to express my best wishes for him in previous blog entries. Now that he has passed away at age 86, I am again filled with thoughts of the good times he brought to us at KROQ in the '90s.

In those days at KROQ, we had the chance to feature a few entertainers who didn't fit the format. Johnny Cash got some attention from the alternative rock audience when he came by to plug "American Recordings." The lineup for the 1993 Acoustic Christmas concert included Tony Bennett. Six months later, we invited Ed McMahon to the 1994 Weenie Roast concert. We asked Ed to dress in the grunge attire of the day and come onstage to introduce Rollins Band.



Ed had been a morning show guest enough times that we could ask him to do almost anything. I could pick up the phone and call him or his wife Pam to see if he was available. I will always remember walking into Ed's house with a digital tape recorder and having him record the intro to Kevin & Bean's Christmas cassette in his memorabilia-filled study. Another time we needed him dressed in a suit on the beach for a video shoot with Jenny McCarthy. She wore a bikini.



After doing all these favors for us, Ed still felt like doing more. He invited Kevin & Bean to appear on "Star Search" as guest announcers. The show was recorded at Walt Disney World. They flew several of us and our wives to Florida to do the morning radio show before the TV taping later that day. After the show, Ed took us all out to dinner with that week's celebrity judges. My wife and I sat at a table with Martha Quinn and "Weird Al" Yankovic.

My wife and I had the chance to sit at the same table with Ed and Pam at another event. We were all guests at Kevin Ryder's wedding. I think that was the same year that Ed invited us to his birthday party. To this day, I still regret being so sick with flu-like symptoms that I had to stay in bed and miss Ed's party. It was a milestone year for him. As I recall, he had reached the age at which his father died and was thankful to still be around. We would have all been thankful to have him around even longer.

home to Your dwelling place

The sad news about Nancy Feist's death hit hard for my wife and many others throughout the Diocese of Knoxville as they helped to plan her funeral Mass. Nancy was Executive Secretary to the Bishop. The 43-year-old collapsed at a ballgame on Friday. Even more heartbreaking was the fact that she was seven months pregnant. Doctors delivered her son Peter but he died shortly after being baptized. Nancy and her husband David have five other children. David teaches at St. Mary's School in Oak Ridge.

I had heard that Nancy moved to Knoxville from Pennsylvania to work for then-Bishop Joseph Kurtz. When he was elevated to Archbishop of Louisville, Nancy and her family stayed in East Tennessee. In 2007, the East Tennessee Catholic published a photo of Nancy with Bishop Kurtz as he prepared for his farewell Mass. During the time we were without a bishop, Nancy worked for Diocesan Administrator Fr. Al Humbrecht. Archbishop Kurtz will lead a recitation of the rosary on Tuesday night at Rose Mortuary on Kingston Pike.

When I interviewed newly ordained Bishop Richard Stika, I made the arrangements with Nancy. She wanted to know what I planned to discuss and asked for some background information about the public affairs show. Bishop Stika will be the main celebrant for Nancy's funeral Mass at 10:00 a.m. on Wednesday at All Saints Catholic Church. Archbishop Kurtz and Bishop James Vann Johnston will concelebrate, along with several other priests of the Diocese.

They have set up an online CareCalendar to organize offers of meals and housework for the Feist family. Thoughts and prayers can be expressed online too. Monetary donations for the children can be sent to the "Nancy Feist Fund" at the Diocese.

plate off

Paul Oscar Anderson passed away on Friday. Like many, I learned of his death from Knoxville Radio History 101. During his radio career, he was on the air at dozens of stations from Knoxville to Portland to Los Angeles.

When I first moved to Knoxville, Don Barrett of LARadio.com put me in touch with Paul. We exchanged emails and had several phone conversations while he still lived at home. His health continued to deteriorate and he moved into a nursing home.

I went to the Highland Memorial Funeral Home last night to pay my respects. Paul's widow Bobbie told me that radio was his first love. As a child, he would play with a microphone instead of a toy gun like the other kids. She also said she had heard that a radio station in California was going to do an on-air tribute to Paul that morning.

The service began as four men wearing white aprons processed into the chapel. They recited the Last Masonic Rites and placed an apron on Paul's coffin. I think they called it a lambskin. The light blue casket had the words "Going Home" on the inside of the open lid.

Paul's daughter Teresa sang one of the songs at the service. In his remarks, Preacher Guy Milam of North Knoxville Baptist Church said "our paths lead not to, but through the grave." Another song included the lyrics "though your sins be as scarlet, they will be as white as snow."

When I got home from the funeral I powered up my old laptop to see if I had saved any of the emails Paul and I exchanged. Here are a few of the things he wrote to me in 2003 and 2004:

Hey Frank,
Thanks for the note. It seems that the best and brightest broadcasters at least came through the South and Midwest. I'm sure that you were one of them. Thanks the offers of goodies, Frank, but I am a diabetic and on a very strict diet. I have myriad other medical hassles which keep me homebound.

Sorry about WOKI. I knew a number off your compadres, including Johnny P. It saddens me to say it, but broadcasting, especially radio, is a ball-busting, low paying job, which takes and rarely gives. I say that after having worked at 37 radio/TV stations over a period of almost 40 years. I let the job take four wives and my self-respect. I wound up in a treatment center for boozers at The Hazleden Foundation in Minnesota. I am a native of Knoxville and have been back home with my childhood sweetheart for almost 29 years. I worked at almost every station in town. Ask Phil Williams about my work here. Despite it all, I still have goose bumps when I think of radio. I really miss the mic, although I have been retired eleven years.

Let me know what's happening at WOKI now -- if you know -- and what your plans are. If I can be of help in any way, let me know.

The best,
POA (Paul Brown)
-------------------------

What a pleasure talking with (AT) you this morning. I could tell within a minute that you were a real broadcaster, kicked in the stomach enough, and been around the horn enough times to have earned the title.

I apologize for talking so much. It is rare that I get to talk to anyone who knows radio like you do. Once in a while I hear from Neil Ross, Tom Murphy, Buzz Barr (KISN) and a couple of others.

If we don't get a chance to meet in person, don't forget me, and remember that I am praying for you. I feel that you will be glad that you were booted at WOKI. You sound like you have the experience and smarts for ANY market.

I know it doesn't often work like this, but I never sent a tape or resume in my long and checkered career. I got the program director or G.M. on the telephone and that worked for me. I really hope for you the very best. I know right where you are. I was there a great number of times and always came out better off than I was when the travails descended upon me. I know that you will do well.

God bless
POA
-------------------------

Hey Frank,

I had already read in the local scandal sheet that you had connected. And then, you were on the LARP. I just cleared my e-mail, some of which was a week old. I had 73 when I got busy this morning.

Hang in there, pal. Instead of moving every time I was offered a bigger market and a couple of bucks more than I was earning, I would have been dollars and serene times ahead had I stayed put. Can't tell yourself the truth when it WOULD have set you free.

You are smarter than I. Good luck to you and your family. If I can ever be of service, please call or write.

God bless,
Paul
-------------------------

I am just going through my old e-mail and ran across one you sent when first I was out of the hospital. I have just now returned from another open heart operation, and the addition of a defibrillator to my pacemaker. I am hanging on -- barely. I now have diabetes (the worst of my ailments, I feel), prostate cancer, heart failure to the point that I stay in bed most of the time. No energy. I fell perhaps a couple of dozen times, leaving me with several visible skull fractures. Other than a couple of other minor ailments, all is well with me. I am too damn mean to die.

Speaking of which, I thought of the good guys who were with me in the sixties at KISN who have passed in recent years. Tom Matthews, Don Kennedy, Bobby Simon, Whitey Coker, whom I spoke to just a couple of days before his throat cancer took him away. (God, I loved him.) I guess we are too tough to buy the farm just yet.

I am 73 last October. I don't sweat it, since I have not control over when and where I will go. I am ready whenever the Big Guy calls. I have lived a hell of a life, so I can't complain if I go today. I have done everything I thought I was big enough to do. Can't ask for more in one life.

God Bless,
POA

sudser dud

Can anyone explain soap operas to me? I have never watched one for more than a few minutes. Last week, I made a point of tuning in to "All My Children" to see Jeff "Fish Bait" Joslin's appearance as an assistant district attorney. He was on within the first couple of scenes and I shut off the TV after he was done.

Today I was watching one of Stacy McCloud's last appearances on the noon news. By the way, she was very kind to mention me in her blog yesterday. After the news ended, I wasn't quick enough with the remote and I saw the beginning of "The Young and the Restless." It started in a morgue, piquing my interest. Then they lost me when the lid of a cheap-looking casket opened and the old woman inside sat up and talked about her exhumation. So, is she a zombie? I thought the soaps were more realistic than supernatural. Or is it just a literary device? How did she die in the first place? Why do I care?

mic flag at half-staff

Paul Harvey loved his job so much that the only thing that could stop him was his death yesterday at age 90. He had been recently slowed by illness and by the loss of his wife Angel. For most of us, Harvey was on the air our entire lives and the airwaves will feel emptier without him.

I used to make a point of timing my commute home from WAVA to coincide with "The Rest of the Story." It aired during the Trumbull & Core show on WMAL. In the privacy of my car, I would shout out the name of the person I thought Harvey might be talking about. When I didn't know, I always guessed Abraham Lincoln, which was often the right answer.

The late David Haines had no problem with people thinking he sounded like Paul Harvey. Haines so admired Harvey that he recorded his idol's 8:30 a.m. newscast each day. Often Haines would be in the middle of his own newscast on WAVA but could reach over and press the record button on his AM/FM cassette machine without missing a beat.

Harvey set the standard for any announcer ever given the opportunity to do an endorsement commercial. He only spoke on behalf of products that he believed in, which meant that many potential sponsors were turned away. Don't tell me you wouldn't love to have one of those tankless water heaters he advertised.

Over the years I fell out of the habit of listening to Paul Harvey through no fault of his. The stations in Los Angeles and Knoxville didn't air his programs at a time that was especially convenient for me. In fact, I don't think the news/talk station here runs him at all. Now that he's gone, I want nothing more than to hear him again. Maybe there are some classic podcasts I can download from somewhere.

There are some assorted clips on YouTube including a "Letter from God" and a few examples of "The Rest of the Story." His Chicago flagship, WGN Radio, has an online tribute page with several audio clips available, including the classic phrase: "Stand by for news!"

or else it gets the hose again

The security crew at the promotional screening of "The International" made it very clear that no cameras or cell phones with cameras were allowed into the theatre. They looked into purses of female filmgoers and once the movie started, they used night-vision goggles to scan the crowd in search of anyone recording it.

If someone were trying to pirate "The International" last night, their copy would be easy to spot. The first few minutes of the film on were out of frame, similar to a television with a vertical hold problem. The bottom of the picture was on the top of the screen and the top was on the bottom. The problem got fixed but then returned at the start of the second reel. Two weeks ago, at a promo screening of "New in Town," the first few minutes were out of focus and the pre-show music continued playing in the auditorium. Could these problems be Hollywood's latest anti-piracy measure?

Former News Sentinel critic Betsy Pickle sat in front of me at both screenings. She told me that her reviews are now available on the Alliance of Women Film Journalists website.

I asked Betsy if she had attended the memorial service for photographer Clay Owen this week. It was held at St. Mary's Hospital in the room that St. Albert the Great parish uses for Sunday Mass while their church is being built. She was there and described to me the priest who spoke. It could only have been Fr. Ragan Schriver, which made sense. I recently found a Fr. Ragan fan club on Facebook and was touched to see that Clay had joined the group before his death.

a long, long time ago

"The Day the Music Died" was commemorated at the Surf Ballroom on Monday night. Anyone with even a passing knowledge of rock and roll knows that the phrase refers to the plane crash that killed Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens and the Big Bopper. Most people also know it as a lyric from "American Pie," a song by the most famous alumnus of my high school, Don McLean.

When I saw the movie "La Bamba," some girls in the theatre were shocked to tears by the film's ending. I guess they didn't know it was a true story. Los Lobos, the group that provided Ritchie Valens' music for the soundtrack, performed at the Surf Ballroom on Monday as part of the "50 Winters Later" concert. Reading about the tribute show has me interested in watching the possible TV special, should it get made.

A Minneapolis TV station did a story about a woman who recently found her photos from the February 2, 1959 concert. The Des Moines Register has tons of material online about the 50th anniversary of the crash, including something with a Body Farm connection.

In a couple of our interviews, Dr. Bill Bass has described his participation in the exhumation of the Big Bopper. He and Jon Jefferson allowed the Register to reprint a lengthy excerpt about the case from their non-fiction book "Beyond the Body Farm."

cut short

The News Sentinel lost a great photographer yesterday. Clay Owen died unexpectedly at 47. Fred Brown and Saul Young have written tributes to their fallen comrade.

Clay's photos enhanced two fascinating articles that were in the paper recently. One was a somewhat grisly tale about cold-weather hog butchering and the other was a touching story about a friendship that developed over doughnuts.

Last fall, Clay came to Patrick Sullivan's to take my picture before an Einstein Simplified show. I was fortunate enough to have made it into the paper's East Tennessee's Best section. In our brief encounter I could easily see why Clay's friends and colleagues liked and respected him so much.

extended dance mix

When Dr. Bill Bass and Jon Jefferson come in for an interview to promote their Body Farm books, I don't want the conversation to end. As the show we taped on Tuesday neared the half-hour mark, I decided to just keep going, knowing I could edit it later. The program that aired this morning was exactly thirty minutes long however the version I'm posting here is fifty-five forensic-filled minutes of fun.

The focus of the first half-hour is the science behind the new book "Bones of Betrayal." We talked about DMORT disaster drills, radiation sickness and Big Ed's Pizza. We also discussed Dr. Arpad Vass and his decomposition sniffer, which I called an electronic cadaver dog. Vass was featured in a very interesting News Sentinel article in mid-December.

When the conversation turns to the Incorruptibles, you'll know that you are hearing web-only content. A recap of the Big Bopper case led to talk of exhumation. If there is any question about the circumstances of my death, I want my body to be exhumed as many times as necessary, unlike the recent case of a former district attorney general, whose exhumation was denied. When we talked about dismembered hands, I related the story of my search for the relic of Fr. Damien of Molokai who will soon be canonized as a saint.

Jefferson and Bass begin a month-long promotional tour on Tuesday with a benefit event at the Y-12 New Hope Center. Tickets are $25 in advance or $35 at the door. Advance sale tickets can be purchased by calling Knox Heritage at 865-523-8008 or by sending an email to info@knoxheritage.org. They'll make the rounds of local retailers too. You can get a book signed at Borders Books on Wednesday, Sam's Club and Hastings Books on Saturday, Books-A-Million in Oak Ridge on Sunday and Hargreaves Books next Monday.

As usual, you can right click here and save the mp3 file to your computer or click the play button below.

as in minus everything interesting

What is it like to watch Quincy in a post-CSI world? Earlier this week I did my annual interview with Jon Jefferson and Dr. Bill Bass, which will air Sunday morning. I got home that day and was inspired to watch an old episode of "Quincy, M.E." that was about to start on WMAK.

The episode starts as a dead priest is discovered in a call girl's apartment. We only see a glimpse of the body's feet beyond the bedroom door. While the camera stays on the police lieutenant questioning the lady of the evening in the living room, Quincy goes into the bedroom and shuts the door! Really? I thought the show was called "Quincy, M.E." not "Monahan, P.D."



Lt. Monahan quickly suspects that the good padre has been framed. He needs Quincy to provide an explanation. Our view of the corpse is obscured by a light fixture in the autopsy room. Quincy and Sam discover a possibility that the body was moved after death. As they are telling Monahan about it, Sam says that it has to do with lividity. Proving how far we've come since then, Quincy replies, "Oh c'mon Sam, let's not bore him with the details now." Go ahead Sam, bore me!

the backwards robe

This hasn't been the best week for me. I've been fighting a cold, which started with a sore throat the night before the second performance of the cantata at All Saints Church. Plus I was saddened by the anniversary of my father's death on Wednesday and by the news today that a co-worker died after a long illness. There were a couple of other things too. On the plus side, I was asked to sponsor a candidate in the RCIA at Sacred Heart Cathedral and I got to go to the circus.

Late Tuesday night, my wife and I went to Walgreens to buy me some more decongestant. While the pharmacist was checking our driver's licenses, I was looking at the "As Seen On TV" shelf. I decided to buy the item my wife has been wanting since she first saw the commercial. And although it's hers, she let me try on her brand new Snuggie.



It reminds me of a choir robe, a hospital gown and an airline blanket. It's fairly thin, which became obvious when I held it up to a light. Apparently there is also a product called the Slanket, which claims to be thicker and is considerably more expensive than the $14.95 we paid for the Snuggie at Walgreens. Unlike the TV commercial, we only had to buy one Snuggie and didn't have to pay an extra $7.95 each for shipping and handling. We still got the bonus book light, as promised on the box.

unto dust thou shalt return

A recent post on a UT football message board suggested that instead of naming more streets after players and coaches, the University should honor famed forensic anthropologist Dr. William Bass. As I drove onto the campus tonight, it might have been easier for me to find my way if I could have just followed Bill Bass Boulevard to where I needed to go. I turned right one street too soon and then couldn't get into the parking garage without going back out to Cumberland Avenue.

I was part of a huge crowd that showed up to hear Dr. Bass speak at a Lifelong Learning event. Two ladies who rode up in the elevator with me kept looking at me like they knew me. I turned to them and said "you didn't think I would miss this, did you?" At that point, one of them said she sent me an email about the lecture. Several people had, for which I am thankful. I was early enough to get a seat inside the University Center Auditorium. Once that room filled, people were sent to an overflow room, where they could watch on closed-circuit television.



The topic of tonight's talk and slide show was cremation, which played into the plot of last year's Jefferson Bass novel, "The Devil's Bones." Most people don't realize that a recognizable skeleton remains after cremation. After any metallic parts (i.e. artificial knees or hips) are removed from the pile, the bones must be pulverized to create the "ashes."

When Dr. Bass finished his presentation, Jon Jefferson briefly took the podium to preview their next book, "Bones of Betrayal." As mentioned previously, the story is set in Oak Ridge and deals with radiation and murder most foul. Afterward the authors signed copies of their books for a long line of fans.



Jefferson and Bass will launch "Bones of Betrayal" at a fundraising benefit for the Oak Ridge Heritage and Preservation Association. Tickets are $25 and are available from Knox Heritage, even though Oak Ridge is in Anderson County. After that, they will sign books at several stores in the region. Be sure to get a copy. I've already read a galley proof and it's fantastic. More about that in the days ahead.

Instead of heading straight home, I made plans to grab some dinner with Jon at the Downtown Grill and Brewery. I almost didn't make it because of the incredibly long time it took to get out of the University Center parking garage. Once I got to Gay Street, I found Jon and several of the bar's regulars. They refer to their weekly gathering as "Wednesday Night Prayer Service."

perpetual light skype upon them

In this Internet era, everyone could benefit from having a Google Alert for their own name. I've had one in my name for a while and I've recently suggested that my wife and kids set up some for themselves. This past January, Stacy McCloud got a laugh when a Google Alert showed her name in my blog post titled "local news anchor on pot."

When I first set up my own Google Alert, I would get a lot of links to pages about the late politician and judge Frank Murphy and to news stories mentioning the Frank Murphy Hall of Justice. The famous Michigander turned up recently in a story on George Mason University's History News Network. Sometimes I got news of former NFL player Frank Murphy. Lately there have been even more Frank Murphys turning up on the Alert.

There's a Frank Murphy who is a "streetwise scrum half," whatever that means. In Florida, there's a Frank Murphy who is the president of Catholic Charities, Diocese of St. Petersburg. A Dr. Frank Murphy is vice-president of the South Carolina Animal Care and Control Association. However it was yet another Frank Murphy who gave me reason to write this post.

He's a funeral director in Salem, Massachusetts who has started using the Internet to help grieving families. He sets up video streaming to allow far-off relatives to view funeral services online.

The process requires only a single camera, a laptop and an Internet connection. There is a 40-second delay, but viewers are essentially watching the proceedings in "real time" through a link to a secure page or by logging in to a password-protected portion on the Murphy Funeral Home Web site.

The biggest challenge was practical, not philosophical. The church lacks an Internet connection, and Murphy is not ready to take the service wireless — at least not yet. Fortunately, a benevolent neighbor of the church allowed a cable to be run from his router, enabling the broadcast to happen.

As an aside, I thought it funny that the website for the local newspaper in Massachusetts is called WickedLocal.com.

a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole

The directors of "Fish Bait" must be on the lookout for fish stories. Today Jeff Joslin sent along news of the Goonch, a giant catfish believed to be feeding on corpses in India. Sky News has fish photos. Bodies are regularly set adrift on funeral pyres in the Great Kali River. The locals now think that the Goonch have started attacking live swimmers because they are not satisfied with eating the partially burned remains.

All this sudden publicity for the Goonch comes because biologist Jeremy Wade will host a documentary called "Nature Shock: Flesh Eating River Monster" on Britain's Channel Five later this month. On this side of the ocean, an American fisherman, Larry Dahlberg, has a DVD of his adventures with giant catfish in Venezuela. Larry has given Jeff permission to use some of his footage in "Fish Bait."

disturbance in the force

Soft-serve fans in New York and elsewhere are mourning the loss of the original Carvel Ice Cream store. It closed on Sunday so the franchisee can build a Japanese restaurant on his property instead. The local paper interviewed several of the last-day customers and posted a series of photos.

My friend Bean sent me the news, just like he did last year when there was talk of exhuming Tom Carvel's body. Meanwhile the legal battle over Mr. Carvel's estate continues as do the suspicions that he was murdered by his secretary.

come out to socialize

The antique hearse out front reminded me of a display outside the Haunted Mansion. However I wasn't back at Walt Disney World or Disneyland. I was at Stevens Mortuary in Knoxville. The hearse is inside a gazebo-like structure with glass walls and doors.



The Internet has many more photos of horse-drawn hearses still in use today. One site states that Roy Rogers was a collector of horse-drawn hearses. Too bad Trigger predeceased him.

Inside the mortuary I picked up a magnet commemorating Stevens' 50th anniversary. The magnet got me thinking about other promotional products for funeral homes. I found places online that sell euchre score cards, hand fans, tote bags and other miscellaneous items.

of the faithful departed

The tragic story of Thomas Vander Woude's death brought my daughter to tears as I told her about it yesterday. Not because he drowned in a septic tank but because of the reason why.

If I had realized that Mr. Vander Woude lived in Prince William County, Virginia, I might have been quicker to read the details of his life. My wife and I lived there too when we bought a townhouse in Dale City. Like countless other deejays, I first read the news when I saw the following paragraph on Perry Simon's showprep page last week:

No, you may not laugh about this poor guy drowning in a septic tank, not after he died saving his son, who had fallen in before him. He was being heroic.

At the time, I didn't click on the link to read the full story. I wish I had. When the Catholic blog Whispers in the Loggia picked it up, I saw the limitless scope of a father's love for his child. The blog quoted heavily from a very good Washington Post profile of the man.

An earlier piece in the Post described how the retired Mr. Vander Woude attended daily Mass at Holy Trinity Catholic Church and spent his days working around his property with his son Joseph, who has Down syndrome. When the cover to the septic tank collapsed under Joseph, Thomas jumped in and got under his son, pushing him up until rescuers could pull Joseph out. By the time they pulled Thomas out of the sewage, the father of seven was unconscious and could not be revived.

As Bishop Paul Loverde pointed out at the funeral, Mr. Vander Woude's sacrifice was "saintly." Rocco Palmo, the writer of Whispers in the Loggia, picked up on the fact that not only are people praying for the Vander Woude family but that an emailer to National Review found themselves praying to Thomas. Parents everywhere should be inspired by Mr. Vander Woude's example of selflessness.

more leftovers

The cracker crust makes St. Louis pizza unique. During our road trip last month, my wife and I went to Imo's Pizza to sample some. The crust was okay but I didn't love the creamy sauce under the cheese. Some contributors on Chowhound suggested that it's the Provel cheese I didn't like. They mentioned a place called Pi that I should try next time.



We had a better meal at the City Coffee House & Crêperie. We ordered both a savory crêpe and a sweet one to share. They used a small rake-like utensil to smooth the batter over the griddle. The crêpes get stuffed with almost anything you can imagine.



The Cardinals were playing a home game as we drove out of town. During the radio pregame show, I heard a testimonial commercial for Kutis Funeral Home. Who did they get to voice the spot? Jack Buck's widow.

in a world

Movies were on my mind this morning even before I heard the sad news about Don LaFontaine's death. Don was, of course, the ultimate movie trailer voiceover announcer. YouTube has some great footage including a short documentary about "the voice" and routine by comedian Pablo Francisco. I especially enjoyed seeing "5 Guys in a Limo," which featured Don and four other voiceover guys in a skit for an industry function.

I was lucky enough to get Don to appear in one of the live radio dramas I directed at KLOS. As you would expect, he was the consummate professional, eagerly taking direction from me and waiting for me to point at him before he delivered his lines. It's no accident that I chose to stand next to Don in the cast photo.



My original plan for today's entry was to gripe about the summer box office reports. With Don's passing, I've lost some of my vitriol on the topic. Hollywood touts the amount of money movies bring in but rarely mentions the number of tickets sold. A news story I heard on ABC this morning said that the movies collected $4.2 billion this summer, up slightly from last year's $4.18 billion. This came despite a four percent drop in attendance. The increase was due to higher ticket prices. I just want to hear the Hollywood studios publicly acknowledge that attendance is down because ticket prices are up. Every time they raise prices, they increase the divide between the blockbusters and the bombs. If tickets cost less, the average person would be willing to take a risk on seeing more movies in the theater rather than waiting for them to turn up on DVD or HBO. Don't even get me started on the concessions.

all shook up

It would not have been too difficult to make Memphis the first stop on our recent road trip. However that would have put us at Graceland on August 16th, which is both the best and worst possible day to visit the home of Elvis. Instead my wife and I were there on August 20th, which was still close enough to The Big E's death anniversary that many of the floral arrangements from his fans were still on display.



After we toured the mansion and the airplanes, we wandered over to the broadcast booth for Elvis Radio on Sirius Satellite Radio. I gestured to the deejay inside that I wanted to take a picture with him. Big Jim Sykes opened the door and graciously posed with me. I told him that I worked in Knoxville and he said that he had also. As we swapped radio stories, I learned that Big Jim was once known as Jungle Jim when he did mornings on the old WOKI. He didn't like the name, which had been assigned by his boss. I promised to email him a link to Knoxville Radio History 101, a blog full of memories he would enjoy.

Big Jim asked if I had ever met his former program director, Brother Clay Gish. I explained that not only had I met him (back when he was still a him), but that I will often get a request line call during a weekend shift from Gishelle Diva Gish, as the former Clay is now known. Big Jim was rather surprised to learn of Gishelle's transition and said he would look for photos online. I said that I wished I could see his reaction when he does. At that point, Jim invited us into the studio while he did a Google search for Gishelle. Big Jim's jaw almost hit the floor when he saw the article and photo essay about her on knoxnews.com. I'm glad I was there to see it.

prison guard's son

Gavin DeGraw played the Tennessee Theatre tonight. Yesterday afternoon, I had the opportunity to interview Gavin during a fill-in shift. If you were listening yesterday, you heard parts of the interview. Because we ended up talking longer than format constraints would allow, I'm posting the entire eleven-and-a-half minute interview as a podcast for your aural enjoyment.



Gavin called from Asheville before performing at The Orange Peel. We talked about that venue and the Tennessee Theatre. His tour continues in Nashville tomorrow and Memphis the next night. Thanks to Steve Wildsmith's interview with Gavin in the Maryville Daily Times, I knew to ask about the autobiographical aspect of "I Don't Want to Be." I was interested to learn that Carson Daly gave Gavin a big break by putting him on TV first. Meanwhile Gavin was interested to learn that Carson got his big break as Jimmy Kimmel's intern at a radio station in Palm Springs.

When we got to the topic of his latest song, Gavin sang a little bit of "In Love With a Girl" and described his songwriting process. Because he's known as a songwriter, I asked if there was a song or artist he likes that we would be surprised to hear him cover. He mentioned Hank Williams Jr. and Hank Williams III. I told him that Hank Williams Sr. was one of three famous artists who died after being in Knoxville and that a local festival honors him. Then Gavin told me that Hank Sr.'s heavy drinking may have been due to pain from spina bifida.

Before tonight's concert, I made the stage announcements about upcoming shows (Chris Isaak), muting cellphones and fire exits. Then I went backstage for a meet and greet with Gavin and some listeners.




Opening act Griffin House closed his set with a song about his grandparents. He made sure that the audience understood that the lyrics said "proud to have your blood in my veins." He said many people mistakenly think he's singing about their butt in his face. Yuck.

body of evidence

The church we normally attend in St. Louis is right across the street from the home of my wife's late Aunt Dee. Almost every time we go, our friend Fr. Ragan Schriver urges us to seek out a priest mentor of his and go to Mass at his parish instead.

In order to be ordained, Fr. Ragan needed someone to testify to his worthiness to be a priest. He asked Fr. Gary Braun to be that person. At the ordination, Fr. Gary addressed the Bishop of Knoxville by saying, "Is Ragan Schriver worthy to be a priest? I'm sure I won't be the last to ask that question." His unintentional joke received roars of laughter from the congregation.

Fr. Gary is the director of Catholic campus ministries for the Archdiocese of St. Louis. When we met him, we introduced ourselves as friends of his friend Ragan. With that credential, we got to talking quickly about dozens of subjects. We told him about the time Fr. Ragan spilled hot wax on his own head during an Easter Vigil. Fr. Gary said that Ragan did the same thing during an Easter Vigil in St. Louis when he was still a deacon.

As it turned out, Fr. Gary also knew my wife's late uncle, who was a priest in Missouri. That led us to the topic of my wife's late aunt (the priest's sister) and how we stay in her condo whenever we're in town. Fr. Gary asked if I was freaked out by staying in a dead woman's home. My wife and I laughed before I explained that I wasn't very squeamish about death, mostly due to my interest in the Body Farm. He started asking questions, so I started telling Fr. Gary about Dr. Bill Bass and the research they do at UT.

During our conversation about decomposition, Fr. Gary challenged me to learn more about the Incorruptibles (not the Incredibles) and to report back with my opinion. He mentioned Clare of Assisi and a few other Saints that I could research. Their bodies have not decomposed the way one would expect. I mentioned that my friend Bean had seen the remains of Pope John XXIII, which were still in remarkably good shape and on display in Rome. But I also read that the pontiff was at least partially embalmed, which would keep him off the list. Now that I'm back home in Knoxville, I'll make time to read more about the Incorruptibles. Maybe we all can have a group discussion.

ain't ashamed to tell ya

To say that I was bummed by the death of Bernie Mac would be an extreme understatement. My daughter knows that I am a fan and called to tell me about Bernie's passing. That's how I found out. When I told some co-workers, they hoped that it was some sort of false rumor. A check of the headlines on their cell phones confirmed the sad news.

The first I ever heard of Bernie was when I saw "The Original Kings of Comedy." Two of the film's other stars, Steve Harvey and D.L. Hughley had made multiple guest appearances on the Mark & Brian show in the time I worked at KLOS. They were enough of a draw for me to want to see the movie.

My wife and I were just about the only white people in movie theater that day. Harvey, Hughley and Cedric the Entertainer were all funny but Bernie Mac stole the show. I started watching for him in other movies and on TV. A year or so later, I set up a Season Pass on my TiVo when "The Bernie Mac Show" debuted. Since 2000, I've seen at least eight of Bernie's movies, including the underrated "Pride" and "Mr. 3000."

The best remembrance of Bernie that I read today is by Alan Sepinwall in the Newark Star-Ledger. He reprinted his 2002 interview with the comedian. Meanwhile, my friend Bean spotted a mistake that the Chicago Tribune certainly must regret. You can read the corrected version of their obituary online as well as a better article that came later. When it was first posted, they had not yet inserted some anecdotes about Mac's early years:

Life changed dramatically for Mac when he was 32. He won the Miller Lite comedy search that year and that performance took him to the standup stage, which ultimately led to regular performances on popular shows like HBO's "Def Comedy Jam."

In a few short years, he was able to put a stamp on this tell-it-like-it-is brand of comedy that audiences had come to know him for. He was a hit on the stage, delivering sordid tales of his early life growing up on Chicago's South Side. Would be great to get a couple examples here

His work hit home to the African American audience -- his aggressive, brash comedy had a down home feel to it, tackling everything from family life to black romantic relationships -- yet Mac was able to cross it over, connecting with a majority entertainment scene.

The obituaries aren't enough. I'm going to look for some videos and watch Bernie Mac at his best.

life lesson

A high school teacher in Oklahoma writes a blog called Chalk Dust Makes Me Sneeze. He refers to himself as Mr. W. and he's in or near Muskogee. I only know of him because he turned up on my blogging radar when he wrote that his parents planned to donate their bodies to the Body Farm here in Knoxville. As I scrolled through some other entries, I learned that his parents' minds were still sharp but that their bodies were failing. After his father passed away, the teacher wrote about the odd feeling of there being no funeral.

Of all the entries I found, the best was the one that describes how to make a marriage last. The teacher came to Tennessee to be with his father, who was too weak to do anything. The dying man was more concerned about his bedridden wife than himself. And the teacher's mother thought more about her husband than herself. Here are the exact words:

People wonder how to make marriage last. Simple. Put your partner’s needs first, even when you’re both literally days from death.

and here we go...

Batman fans are buzzing today about the first review of "The Dark Knight." Peter Travers of Rolling Stone absolutely loved it. He's talking about a posthumous Oscar for Heath Ledger. The movie trailers have allayed any fear I had that Heath's untimely death would distract from the film. When I look at him in character, I only see the Joker, not the actor.

Meanwhile Adam West fans can set their TiVos to record the 9 a.m. hour of the "Today" show on Tuesday. Adam, Burt Ward and Lee Meriweather will be interviewed. A couple of Adam West interviews popped up online this week. If you only feel like reading one, I would recommend The Den of Geek instead of ComicBookMovie.com. It's no surprise that Adam is less than enthusiastic about the darker version of the caped crusader.

I don't think it's a contradiction for me to be a fan of both the '60s TV "Batman" and Christopher Nolan's interpretation in "Batman Begins." Of course, I also loved all the other Nolan films I've seen: "Memento," "Insomnia" and "The Prestige."

Some other bat-bits: It's too bad that Adam West wasn't chosen to receive a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame this year. I hope his supporters keep trying. My friend Bean wanted to make sure I had seen a cool behind-the-scenes photo of Adam and Burt filming one of their famous Bat-climbs. My friend Lee sent me a sound clip of a 1960s radio deejay telling his audience that it was time to go watch "Batman." That's a sure-fire ratings winner. Lastly, I saw a picture on the Knoxville Blog Network of what is truly the worst Batman toy ever. Funny, though.

surprise at the pearly gates

George Carlin seemed younger than 71. Maybe not in appearance but certainly in attitude. If someone asked you last week, could you have guessed that he was born in the 1930s? Yesterday morning I awoke to the startling news that Carlin had died. Although he was only a couple of years younger than my parents, he didn't behave like a member of their generation.

The 28-year-old Carlin was virtually unrecognizable in some footage from a 1965 episode of "The Merv Griffin Show." He was clean-cut and doing a more standard form of shtick reminiscent of Rodney Dangerfield. By the time he hosted the first "Saturday Night Live" in 1975, he had reinvented himself into the comedian we all knew. That could explain why he seemed younger than he was.

When asked for a reaction, Jay Leno told ABC News, "If there was ever a comedian who was a voice of their generation it was George Carlin." Leno's quote for USA Today was "He was a student of Lenny Bruce, and, like him, he spoke directly to his generation." Uh, Jay? Please see paragraphs one and two above.

I remember first listening to one of Carlin's comedy albums while visiting some second cousins in Baltimore. They let me use headphones so as not to disturb the grown-ups. And by grown-ups, I mean the people in the house who were closest to Carlin's age.

George Carlin was one of the many celebrities to appear on KLOS while I worked there. I think he was promoting a book at the time. Or maybe an HBO special. Or possibly both. Carlin was nothing short of prolific. I may not agree with all his beliefs, but I am glad to have met him. I think I may have had him sign a book. If I did, it would be packed away in in box in the basement.

Yesterday I flipped over to NPR as part of my resolution to listen to it more often. They were rerunning an interview with George Carlin from 2004. In the segment I heard, the interviewer asked George about his philosophy of life. In her question, she aptly described it as a mix of narcissism and mysticism. Then she asked about his heart attacks and his thoughts on death. He talked about how he would be sad to know that his life was ending whether he had a minute, a month or a year's notice that his time was up. I wonder what was going through the interviewer's mind as she asked the questions. Was she thinking ahead to the day the interview would eventually be replayed?

let perpetual light shine upon them

Tim Russert always reminded me of my father a little bit. There was a slight resemblance in the shape of their faces. Of course there are more differences than similarities but as I watched the sad news about Russert's untimely death today, I could only think of what they had in common. They were both journalists. They both worked for a governor of New York State. They were both proud of their Irish heritage. They both were loyal fans of their favorite NFL teams. They both loved politics. They were both Catholic and both Jesuit-educated. They both collapsed on the job and they both died in Washington, DC at too young an age. My deep sympathy and condolences go to Tim's family and friends.

the darndest thing

Art Linkletter is alive and kicking, as far as I know. Although I had my doubts yesterday when I saw an online obituary for the very talented Harvey Korman. Some fool put Linkletter's photo alongside Korman's obit.



eFluxMedia has been turning up a lot lately in the Google News headlines that I scan. Dumb mistakes like this will keep me from clicking on their links in the future.

retirement fund

The A&P was synonymous for "grocery store" when I was growing up even though my mother also shopped at Finast, Waldbaum's and Grand Union. In fact, she would usually compare the sales flyers in advance and then go to two or three supermarkets in one trip to get the best deals from each.

The heir to the A&P fortune didn't care too much about getting the best deals. Huntington Hartford's obituaries are the most interesting things I've read all day. According to the reports, he squandered $80 million of his $90 million inheritance. I don't know about you, but I could certainly get by on the leftover $10 million.

Let me share some of the best parts with you. From The New York Times:

Huntington went to Harvard, studying English literature and graduating in 1934. He went to work for his uncles at the company’s headquarters, then housed in the Graybar Building next to Grand Central Terminal, where his job was to keep track of sales of bread and pound cake. But he was often absent. In 1934 he defiantly took a day off to attend the Harvard-Yale football game. That ended his career in the family business. Yale won, 14-0.

In 1940, Mr. Hartford tried being a reporter for the New York newspaper PM, after putting up $100,000 to help get the paper started. If nothing else, the experience produced one of the all-time great excuses for missing deadline: he once sailed his yacht to cover an assignment on Long Island, and upon returning to the city could find no place to tie up and come ashore with the story.

With the start of World War II, he donated the yacht to the Coast Guard. In return he was given the command of a modest supply ship in the Pacific. He ran it aground twice — once, he said later, because his navigational charts were out of date, the other time because "I mistook feet for fathoms."

From The Washington Post:

His excesses cost him financially and personally. He had unexpectedly ascetic habits in some pockets of his life, such as a disinclination to drink alcohol. But his fourth marriage, in the 1970s, marked a turning point. According to a 2004 Vanity Fair magazine report, that last wife, a Fort Lauderdale hairdresser a decade his junior, introduced Mr. Hartford to cocaine, amphetamines and quaaludes.

He was hospitalized at least once for an overdose, and his fourth wife remained a destructive presence in his life for years. His apartment at One Beekman Place in New York became the site of violent encounters involving transient visitors. He was once left for hours writhing in pain after falling and breaking a hip.

When he made the news, it was usually for something unsavory, such as the fourth wife's assault on his secretary.

It looks like Hartford had one good idea that could have increased his wealth if he had been able to get a gambling license for Paradise Island. From the Times again:

Costlier still was Mr. Hartford’s makeover of Hog Island, in the Bahamas. After buying four-fifths of the place in 1959 and having it renamed Paradise Island, he set about developing a resort with the construction of the Ocean Club and other amenities. Advisers persuaded him to stop short of exotic attractions like chariot races, but, overextended and unable to get a gambling license, he wound up losing an estimated $25 million to $30 million.

Missed it by that much.

the more things change

Tonight's entry comes from a very special guest blogger, my father. How is that possible, you ask, considering that he's been dead for twenty-five years? My mother recently gave me copies of some letters he wrote during the mid to late 1970s. He's no Ted L. Nancy but I was amused nevertheless. I am as much interested in his style of writing as I am in the content of the letters. I plan to eventually share three with you. Look for a missive to a member of the New York Giants this fall and a baseball related letter later this spring.

We'll start with a thirty-year-old message to Jimmy Carter's press secretary, Jody Powell. I don't have the clipping that was originally enclosed. We'll have to guess what it was about.

March 16, 1978

Mr. Jody Powell
Press Secretary
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington, DC 20500

Dear Mr.Powell:

I know you are overwhelmed with problems, and I hesitate to send you "just another clipping," but I thought this letter to The New York Times is particularly significant in light of the many issues that confront our society today.

I have not attempted to target on any specific piece of legislation or advance any similar cause, but I do wish to direct your attention to the increasing burden that the middle class -- that is, the producer group -- is being asked to carry for those others in our society who are solely consumers.

If the size of the middle class continues to diminish, if its ability to function and educate its children is further inhibited by ever increasing tax burdens and government programs, the ability of our economy to create sufficient wealth to take care of the needs of all will be critically undermined.

I seriously do not think I overstate the case.

Sincerely,

where are they now?

The best summer job I ever had was working in the box office at Wolf Trap Farm Park for the Performing Arts. We worked ten-hour shifts, four days a week. Almost all the employees were college students, like me. One of my friends, Jim Glancy, stayed with the business and worked his way up to a job in the programming department, hiring the various music acts who played concerts at the venue. Jim's best friend, Joe Kelliher, also worked a couple of summers at Wolf Trap. I've mentioned Joe before.

My favorite memory of Jim is a college radio show he once did at WGMU. All the songs were by rock stars who had died, grouped by cause of death. I think Jimi Hendrix may have been the transition from drug-related to food-related deaths. Or vice versa. At the end of the show, Jim gave honorable mention to Jerry Lee Lewis. Classic.

Eventually Jim moved to New York and took a job doing the same thing at Radio City Music Hall. He and I have lost touch over the years. I'm big on email, he said he would never get an email address. The last time I saw him was on a business trip to New York for the MTV Video Music Awards, which were held at Radio City that year. Before long he was president of Ron Delsner Presents. That company got bought a couple of times and is now part of Live Nation.

Over the weekend I got a new LinkedIn connection from another former WGMU colleague. Thinking about the old days prompted me to type Jim Glancy's name into Google. I was impressed to learn that he had left his job as president of Live Nation to become a partner in The Bowery Presents. He was featured in a New York Times article last year and recently won the Pollstar Concert Industry Award for Talent Buyer of the Year. Gothamist says he's part of the New York music mafia.

So what type of acts is Jim buying for the venues under his control? Mostly artists catering to the New York hipster crowd. I only recognized a handful of names on the Bowery calendar. The one that jumped off the page to me is scheduled for June 21 at Webster Hall. My friend Richard Cheese and his band will make the place swing.

corpuscle crunch

Ben & Jerry's had their Free Cone Day and Baskin-Robbins had their 31 Cent Scoop Night last week. Today our local Bruster's offered free pints! Well, almost free. You had to donate a pint of blood to get the pint of ice cream.



My wife's blood is always in demand. She gets postcards and phone calls from Medic Regional Blood Center about all the blood drives in our area. She's a universal donor. I'm a universal recipient. How appropriate for our relationship.



We both gave blood and got ice cream and a t-shirt. Unfortunately all they had were XL shirts. I only need a large. My wife had to go to choir practice so I took home her pint of Turtle and some Chocolate Oreo for myself. The girl at the window asked if I wanted a bag or a spoon. A spoon? C'mon! Doesn't she realize that I don't wear XL shirts anymore?



My day started with some sad ice cream news. One of the first things I read this morning was the obituary of Irv Robbins, as in half of Baskin-Robbins. The Los Angeles Times had a link to test your flavor knowledge. For me, it was more like a reading comprehension quiz. I scored 100% because all the answers were in the articles I had just read.

to pry or not to pry

John Charles Carter died yesterday. The world knew him as Charlton Heston, the star of two of my favorite movies, "Planet of the Apes" and "The Ten Commandments." I had the pleasure of meeting him twice.

Mr. Heston visited KLOS a couple of times to promote his books. It is unusual for a movie star of his magnitude to do a radio interview. He came because the publishing business has a better appreciation for the power of radio than the movie industry. I was there when he came in to plug "To Be a Man: Letters to My Grandson." On another occasion we needed to bring the show to him. I can't remember exactly why. I made a few calls to his house and spoke with Mrs. Heston to make plans for the broadcast. On the appointed day, we took the Mark & Brian Mobile up Coldwater Canyon Drive to the Heston home. The entire interview was conducted in the driveway, near his grandson's sandbox.

The broadcast from Heston's driveway was similar to our on-air visits to the exteriors of the homes of Peter Falk and John Travolta. We didn't presume to set foot in their houses either.

thank the academy

The Oscars are always must-see TV at our house even though I've seen hardly any of the nominated movies this year. In the past, my wife and I have made an effort to see the films nominated for the major awards. With the price of gas and everything else going up and money getting tight, I am reluctant to shell out cash for movie tickets, much less the concessions.

Lately some movies I had wanted to see in the theater have been showing on a plethora of HD channels. In the past month I've seen "Children of Men," "Pride" and "The Astronaut Farmer." None of them won any Oscars but I enjoyed them nevertheless.

I won't attempt to live-blog the awards like they're doing at Best Week Ever and elsewhere. However, I noticed a few things worth mentioning. Did Steve Carell actually curse when pretending to be upset that he was presenting the animation award instead of the documentary award? One of his "shoots" sounded like the real deal to me.

During the dead celebrity tribute, I always feel embarrassed for the people who don't get applause. Some of the deceased get carryover applause by having their name announced right after a popular actor or actress. Shouldn't they mute the microphones during the annual montage?

I thought I saw Knoxville Catholic High School alumnus Cormac McCarthy in the audience when the Coen brothers won the adapted screenplay award. Yes, it was him. They pointed him out when "No Country For Old Men" won Best Picture.

All night long I've been trying to catch a glimpse of Diablo Cody's shoes. I read that she was going to wear the million dollar pair from Stuart Weitzman. Why do I care? One year, Stuart's publicist hired me to help out during Oscar week. According to her blog, Diablo has mixed feelings about wearing them. Oh yeah, she won an Oscar for "Juno," one of the few nominated movies that I saw.

Hey, the "I Drink Your Milkshake" guy won! I look forward to seeing that movie next year when it's on HBO or Showtime.

coed naked bar hopping?

Okay, here's what happened. On Thursday, one of my co-workers asked if I had seen the obituaries. I had not but there was a copy of the News Sentinel within reach. By coincidence, Terry Morrow, the paper's television columnist, was visiting. We opened the paper and saw the photo my co-worker had noticed. It showed a now-deceased man during happier times. He's wearing a hat that says "Coed Naked Bar Hopping."

Like anyone else would, we laughed about it. Our conversation was not on the air. I knew from past experience that my boss doesn't like me to joke about local deaths on the radio. I told Terry that someone in another market might be able to have fun with it even if I couldn't. We all know that comedy equals tragedy plus time. Sometimes comedy also equals tragedy plus distance. Because Terry and I both know Jimmy Kimmel, we thought it would be a good idea to send the obit to him.

When I got home, I dashed off a fast email to Jimmy. I complimented him on the Matt Damon video and sent a link to the death notice. His one-word reply was "Hilarious!" Quick tangent: I can't wait to see the next volley in the Kimmel/Damon "feud" which reportedly includes Ben Affleck.

Anyway, as I was scanning the Knoxville Blog Network tonight, I saw a link to a post titled "Knoxville on Jimmy Kimmel Live!" As soon as I clicked, I saw the man in the CNBH hat on "The Sunsphere Is Not a Wigshop." The writer explains:

a friend of mine that is a production assistant on the jimmy kimmel live show called me and told me i was the only knoxville connection that anyone on the crew had and they needed a copy of thursday's knoxville news-sentinel.

He spent $30 to FedEx the newspaper to California and says it may turn up on Tuesday night's show (Mondays are usually reruns). Jimmy must have known I would be too cheap to spend the money.

metal mettle

While looking online to see which Super Tuesday candidates were endorsed by our local newspapers, I was distracted by the front page of the Metro Pulse. The cover story is about guitarist Randy Rhoads, who is one of three famous musicians who died shortly after being in Knoxville. The other two are Hank Williams and Sergei Rachmaninoff.

I was not familiar with Randy's music while he was alive. In fact, it wasn't all that long ago that I first heard of him. I was invited to a year-end presentation of video projects by the students in a media class at Providence High School in Burbank. One of the upperclassmen appeared in a documentary about his late uncle, Randy Rhoads. I recognized Randy's sister Kathy in the film. My wife and I knew her as one of the other room mothers at St. Finbar School.

Kathy's husband Richard is a talented cabinetmaker. He made a gorgeous wooden ambo for St. Finbar Church as well as other altar furniture. When I looked online, I discovered that he is now in the wine business too. Kathy and Richard's daughter Jenna was a classmate of our son for seven years until we moved to Knoxville. Jenna turned up in some red carpet photos as the date of a young actor named Daniel Hansen.

My wife took an extra copy of the paper from the stack on the bar at Patrick Sullivan's last night after my Einstein Simplified show. Now we need to find an old parish directory with Kathy's address in order to mail her a copy of the Metro Pulse. As she read the article, my wife saw that Randy's last name was misspelled on the plaque when he was inducted to the Hollywood RockWalk in 2004. Kathy and her mom are in the photos from the ceremony. They eventually fixed the plaque.

Knoxville has a statue honoring Rachmaninoff and an annual festival for Hank. Perhaps it's time to think of a way to commemorate Randy here too. And spell his name correctly.

too soon

Some audience members at the Einstein Simplified show tonight wanted us to joke about Heath Ledger's sad death. Fortunately we ignored their suggestions.

I heard the news about Heath from my daughter, who knew I would want to know as soon as she saw the breaking news on CNN and Fox News this afternoon. When she called, I was watching our local stations, which were reporting only on the winter weather.

By odd coincidence, my friend Bean posted a blog entry early this morning about the rash of celebrity deaths so far in 2008. My friend Lisa Burks has an entire blog about (mostly celebrity) deaths.

When I turned on my cell phone this morning, I had a voice mail from Terry Morrow. He said he wanted to ask me something about Brad Renfro. Terry wasn't there when I called back so I don't know for sure that he wanted to try and talk me into going to Brad's funeral, which was yesterday or his burial, which was today. But that's what I suspect.

The Associated Press made news with their decision to prepare an advance obituary for Britney Spears. The concept of updating the obit files was even the plot of a "Mary Tyler Moore Show" episode. Yet, the most recent deaths of the young and famous caught the wire services unprepared. Some writers feel they should only keep obituary files on older, more accomplished stars. With instant news on the Internet, readers now expect to see complete obituaries as soon as a celebrity dies. The news services will have a hard time keeping pace with Wikipedia.

five squared

Yesterday's game between the Giants and Packers left me torn. As a football fan, I wanted to see Brett Favre do well after the great season he's had. But as the son of two Giants fans, I felt some loyalty to Big Blue.

I know that my mother was rooting for New York. She told me how much she enjoyed the game when I talked with her today. My late father was a big fan of the Giants. He had season tickets and everything. As a result, I got to see the Giants play at Yankee Stadium, Yale Bowl, Shea Stadium and Giants Stadium. Still, I didn't become a real fan of football until later when I was working at WAVA and I met several of the Washington Redskins as they came in for interviews.

Today is the anniversary of Dad's passing. It's hard to believe that my sisters and I have lived longer since his death than we had before it. My mother has maintained a connection to my father's memory by keeping his Giants season tickets in the family. One of my New York cousins buys the tickets from her each year. The other day Mom got an email from the team with information about the Super Bowl ticket lottery. If she had gotten tickets, I wonder if I would have wanted to buy them from her. I've always thought that I would rather watch the Super Bowl on TV (especially in high definition) than go to the game.

no time like the present

The news of Suzanne Pleshette's death wouldn't have caught me off guard today if I had read about her poor health last fall. Instead I was watching her in "The Birds." By coincidence, I just saw her interviewed in the profile of Bob Newhart on "American Masters" that I had recorded last month on PBS and finally watched on Friday night.

The obituaries described her as "husky-voiced' or "smoky-voiced." Listening to her speak, it wasn't much of a surprise that she succumbed to respiratory failure. The longtime smoker had been fighting lung cancer. There's a nice appreciation of Suzanne's work on USA Today's website.

As usual, I hope that when people hear the sad news they will decide to quit smoking.

read of the dead

The stack of books on my nightstand has several new additions as of late. Perhaps this could be a good time to accept my friend Jessica's invitation to join Goodreads, a social networking site that lets you see what your friends are reading and lets them see what you're reading. Before I go rushing into an online commitment, I want to know a little more about it. Have any of you joined? PC Magazine picked it as one of its Top 100 Undiscovered Web Sites and as its Site of the Week last July.

If I do join Goodreads, Jessica will see that the next three books on my reading list share a common theme. For Christmas, I received "The Book of the Dead" by Patricia Cornwell and "Dead Men Do Tell Tales" by Dr. William Maples. I had just started on the Maples book earlier this week when I was interrupted by an overnight package from HarperCollins.

The publicity department sent me an uncorrected proof copy of "The Devil's Bones," the new Jefferson Bass novel. Like the last proof they sent, I need to finish it before my next interview with the authors, Dr. Bill Bass and Jon Jefferson. Right now, I'm in the middle of chapter 8 where the main character, Dr. Bill Brockton, is gathering information at a local crematorium. He just learned about the special steps that must be taken to cremate an obese person. They burn hotter. The chapter reminded me of a link to a newspaper story I saw last week in Perry Simon's Talk Topics column on AllAccess.com. The article says that larger dead people require bigger autopsy tables, morgue drawers and other equipment. I'll have to bring it up in the interview.

not for the squeamish

As the clock winds down on this All Souls Day, I am watching an episode of the PBS series "Frontline" entitled "The Undertaking." It was broadcast in HD on Tuesday night. You can still see it online if you so choose. The show is about a funeral home in a small Michigan town. What makes this funeral home unique is that one of the proprietors is an author and poet. From the excerpts I heard him read on the show, he's quite good. His book, "The Undertaking" was a source for Alan Ball when he was doing research for "Six Feet Under."

if ever he would leave us

The great Robert Goulet has died of pulmonary fibrosis. He was always one of my favorite radio guests. He never broke character but still seemed to understand the inherent campiness of his appearance on the morning shows I produced back then. At WAVA, Don & Mike would pre-promote the next appearance of "Goulet on the Zoo" more than most other guest bookings. Each year the largest and best Christmas card I received was postmarked in Las Vegas and bore a return address that said "ROGO & ROVE." The card always had a new photo of Robert and his wife Vera on the front.

During my time at KLOS, we would put on old-fashioned radio plays. At first it was just "A Christmas Carol." Later we expanded it to "The War of the Worlds" one Halloween and two episodes of "The Witch's Tale" the next year. Our most ambitious effort was probably the production of "The Wizard of Oz" we did one Easter. Dwight Yoakam was the first celebrity to sign up. He knew right away that he wanted to play the Cowardly Lion. Mark & Brian wanted to play the Tin Woodman and the Scarecrow but neither wanted to sing, especially since they would be compared to Dwight. I had the idea to get them a stunt double, somebody who was a consummate professional yet would get the joke. We didn't tell the audience about it in advance. The listeners were expecting to hear Brian sing "If I Only Had a Brain" and Mark sing "If I Only Had a Heart" but instead they heard the robust voice of Robert Goulet both times. You can see Mr. Goulet in the center of the cast photo below.



I still hear Robert Goulet's voice every night singing the theme song to "Jimmy Kimmel Live." My deepest sympathy goes to Vera and the rest of his family.

corpsie-puss

The email from my friend Bean had the most irresistible subject line. It read: "nothing has ever been more Frank blogworthy than this." He sent me a news blurb about the late ice cream magnate Tom Carvel. Much like the Big Bopper, Carvel's family wants to have his body exhumed and autopsied to see if he was murdered.

Tom Carvel was well known in New York as the voice of his company's radio and TV commercials. Once when I was a kid, I saw him at a street festival in Tuckahoe. He was the emcee of an ice cream eating contest in front of the Carvel store in Depot Square. I also remember my Dad driving us past the site of the first Carvel store and telling us how it was the built on the spot where Tom Carvel's ice cream truck got a flat tire.

Tom Carvel is one of several celebrities interred at Ferncliff Cemetery. If he were still alive, I'm sure he would be busy promoting the discounts available this week as Fudgie the Whale celebrates his 30th birthday.

a comedy tragedy

Sometimes a death can bring people together. At every funeral I've been to, somebody says that it's great to see you again but that they're sorry it has to be under these circumstances. Somebody else will say that the only time we ever get together anymore is at funerals and weddings. I hadn't talked with my friend Charlie Reinke in a long time. The sad news of Richard Jeni's death prompted me to call Charlie today.

Charlie is a comedy writer in Burbank. We met because our daughters went to grammar school together. As our families became good friends, our wives would often make plans for the four of us. Charlie and I would occasionally go to TV show tapings using tickets that either he or I had gotten through a business contact. I've mentioned before that Charlie's wife, Anja, is running for city council.

I called Charlie to talk about Richard Jeni. We had taken our wives to see Richard perform at the Ice House and had gone backstage to say hi. Charlie and I were in the audience for a taping of Richard's UPN sitcom, "Platypus Man." Charlie told me tonight how Richard would sometimes make a guest appearance in the comedy writing class that Charlie took when he was getting started in the business. Two of the first three jokes he sold were to a TV show called "Caroline's Comedy Hour" and were delivered by Richard Jeni.

I am a fan of Richard's comedy. I've watched his HBO specials and I booked him to appear on KLOS several times. The program director once asked me to find a comedian to entertain between sets at a classic rock concert the station was hosting at the Glen Helen Pavilion in San Bernardino. I arranged for Richard Jeni to do it but it didn't go well. The road crew for the next band refused to stop soundchecking the drums during Jeni's performance. As Richard valiantly tried to get laughs, you could hear the roadie slowly pounding on each drum in the kit and monotonously saying "one, one, one" then "two, two, two" and so on into a microphone.

Charlie hopes to go to memorial service for Richard. He suggested that I check a blog entry from the wife of comedy writer T. Sean Shannon on her MySpace page. On "The View" this morning, the women mentioned a blog posting about Richard written by Elayne Boosler. It will be the last thing I read before bed tonight.

inevitable

Saddened and disappointed are the words that come to mind upon hearing of Anna Nicole Smith's passing. Her death caps off a series of recent tragic events. I first heard of Anna Nicole in the early '90s from my friend Bean, who was a fan of her work as a Guess model before she was in Playboy. I think she may have eventually appeared on his radio show while promoting her series on the E! Network. I never met Anna Nicole myself but my daughter met her son Daniel when he briefly attended the same school in Burbank. I don't think money would have solved her problems but I do think that Anna Nicole deserved to get a large sum after J. Howard Marshall died. Not all his money, but a lot of it.

in the afterlife

According to a recent news story, more people die in January than any other month. I used to think there was a rush on deaths during the last week of December even though I should have reason to know better. Today happens to be the anniversary of my father's death. I can't visit his grave today but I can look at some photos my daughter took on Memorial Day. Wikipedia has a list of famous people who also died on this date. I'm imagining Dad at some sort of celestial cocktail party with Jack Lord, Peggy Lee and the guy who played Alfalfa.

on deadline

The editors at USA Today chose today's paper to list the notable figures who died in 2006. Why couldn't they wait for the year to end? I seem to recall that they've done this before. This year it backfired on them more so than usual. The death of former president Gerald Ford was reported late last night, after USA Today had gone to press. Not only is his passing missing from the list of 2006 deaths, he's not mentioned anywhere in the paper.

There are some other celebrities who've died on the day after Christmas. One of the first celebrity deaths that I remember from childhood was the passing of former president Harry Truman. Jack Benny, Jason Robards and Reggie White also died on December 26th.

While reading the list of entertainers who died in 2006, I was reminded of my blog entry from February 6th. I wrote about the deaths of Al Lewis and Fayard Nicholas, both of whom I had the opportunity to meet. I've met two other stars who died this year. I booked Jack Palance to appear on the Mark & Brian show once or twice while I worked there. I would have met Steve Irwin too but I was on jury duty the day he visited KLOS. Because Steve was not yet well known in America, I had to persuade Mark & Brian to say yes when the booking was offered to us.

My other "brush with greatness" (or could I say "brush with late-ness"?) happened back when I worked in the box office at Wolf Trap Farm Park for the Performing Arts. My boss asked two or three of us to accompany him to a late night performance at the Madeira School (yes, that Madeira School). We were to sell tickets to a Wolf Trap sponsored performance of some opera. The conductor was the larger-than-life Sarah Caldwell. I won't speak ill of the dead, so I'll just say that she was a little different. Okay, okay... She could have used a shower and she could have been nicer to the people working the event. How's that?

after life

Happy Dia de los Muertos! Today is All Souls Day, a day to remember our deceased friends and family members.

You've probably never worried about what will happen to your email after you die. CNET News ran a story a few weeks back about taking your passwords to the grave. Some email providers will give your password to your survivors upon proof of your passing. If I were to die unexpectedly, I would want my wife to post something about it here on the blog, which means I have to make sure she can find the necessary passwords.

I once wrote that I wanted our friend Mary K. to sing my favorite arrangement of the "Litany of the Saints" at my funeral. Last night I heard my wife sing it beautifully at the All Saints Day Mass. If Mary K. isn't available, my wife could do the honors although I had already asked her to sing "Ave Maria." The "Litany of the Saints" turns up in my blog search results occasionally, including a couple of times this week. The litany music that I like so much is by John D. Becker.

After the death of proprietor Robert Martin, I was worried about the future of my favorite BBQ place. His family members kept the place open and continued serving great food. Every year at this time they would put up a sign announcing the date they will close for the winter. Well here's huge news. The sign went up today but it said that M&M Catering will now remain open all year long!

weighing on my mind

All day long I've been trying to think of something to write about other than the death of Daniel Smith but it keeps coming back to me. Anna Nicole Smith's son was only 20 years old. Like many people, I remember when Anna showed up on the scene as a model for Guess? jeans. Like many people, I laughed at, not with, her show on the E! network. Like not so many people, I feel that she deserves a nice chunk of change for marrying that old guy. My wife and I have a child who is the same age as Daniel. When we lived in Burbank, our daughter and Daniel went to the same high school for freshman year. They didn't have any classes together but it was a small enough school that she would see him on campus at lunchtime. He was quiet and kept to himself. I feel sad for Daniel's parents and for all parents who have had to face the horrible pain of losing a child.

tragedy plus time

My son is taking a personal finance class in high school. On Tuesday his class watched a video by Dave Ramsey. In the video, Dave was preaching about the danger of borrowing money. At one point Ramsey says that the Crocodile Hunter "is going to get it" someday because he is always working with deadly animals. The class was shocked. The teacher paused the video in disbelief.

Every year for Halloween, my friend Charlie dresses as a recently deceased celebrity. I will always remember his Payne Stewart costume. He should buy a khaki shirt and shorts soon. I think they'll be sold out by October.

croakey

The news of Steve Irwin's death came as a surprise this morning. I had forgotten to cancel my alarm and was awakened at 4-something by the audio of ABC World News Now. I shut off the clock radio and went back to sleep wondering if I was dreaming or if TV's Crocodile Hunter had really been killed by a stingray.

I've been looking for news about Irwin on the Internet and found some interesting video reports from a New Zealand television station and an article from an Australian paper. Another paper says he was a much bigger star in Europe and America than he was at home. A press release from Animal Planet says that they will air tribute programming tonight at 6:00 and all day on Sunday.

Why wasn't Steve Irwin on the list of eligible celebrities for the Lee Atwater Invitational Dead Pool?

remembrance

Today is Memorial Day, a great day for grilling, swimming and driving. The holiday began as a day to decorate the graves of Civil War soldiers and was originally known as Decoration Day.

My wife and kids drove home today after a weekend spent with family in Northern Virginia. As they approached an exit for Culpeper, they called to ask me how to get to the Culpeper National Cemetery. I have three family members buried there, one of whom is my father. A few months before his death, he buried a relative of his mother's in Culpeper. I remember him being impressed by the history behind that Union cemetery in the South.

To help us remember the true meaning of Memorial Day, I'll share a few photos my daughter took this morning. My favorite is the one with the wall.

weekend wrap-up

Bloggers love comments. They're almost as gratifying as applause. I was pleased to get some comments on my post about The 2wenty. One of those came from an L.A. blogger named Anna who has some interesting posts herself.

My friend Bean has been writing about his upcoming trip to Tennessee. As promised, I asked for a tour of the Body Farm for Bean and me. Carol Bass told me that her husband will be signing books in Tucson that day. She suggested I contact Dr. Lee Jantz to ask for a tour. I sent an email so we'll see how that goes. I should probably mail Bean a copy of this week's Metro Pulse. It's their music issue and has yet another article about WDVX.

Speaking of the Metro Pulse, a blurb in the Ear To The Ground column tipped me off about a Patricia Cornwell novella being serialized on the New York Times website. The column says that much of the novella is set in Knoxville. I'll have to read it as soon as I finish reading "Predator."

Don't you agree that the lovely Stacy Keibler has a slight resemblance to the lovely Elisabeth Hasselbeck? Or am I crazy? Maybe I'm crazy for thinking that Drew Lachey deserves to win "Dancing With The Stars." On the East Coast we saw Drew cover his behind with a cowboy hat after Bruno Tonioli made a "Brokeback Mountain" reference. On Friday's show, "Access Hollywood" reported that the hat trick was edited out of the West Coast broadcast.

Thanks to BoingBoing.net I saw an amazing collection of anachronistic hi-tech products on the Internet this week.

The death of Don Knotts is big news around here. Two episodes of "The Andy Griffith Show" air every weekday on the local CBS affiliate.

Consider this your one week reminder that Einstein Simplified will perform at The Comedy Zone on Saturday, March 4 at 6:00 p.m. Click here for a handy, printable calendar (PDF file). You've made enough excuses in the past. This month you should be there!

housekeeping... hello? anyone there?

An article in USA Today says that some people enjoy staying in hotel rooms touched by scandal or celebrity death. I have one I can add to the list.

In 2002, my family and I spent one night in the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas. John Entwistle of The Who had died in that hotel two months earlier. I read somewhere that the hotel did not want to publicize the room number where Entwistle died. My curiosity was too strong so I asked two maids to tell me the room number. They told me that the rock star died in room 658. I found an online tour guide that says it was room 660 but I'm sticking with my sources. How appropriate that "CSI" uses a Who song for their theme.