two great tastes

With the closing of the Fuddruckers in Salem, my wife and I had to find a different place to stop for dinner on our last trip. We picked a random Cracker Barrel along I-81 in Virginia and were immediately disappointed by the question: "smoking or non-smoking?" Our non-smoking table was in a direct line of sight and smell from the smokers. Even though the non-smoking section was much larger, we had to wait for a table. There was no waiting for a smoking table.

Cracker Barrel has a country store where we could bide our time. One corner of the store had a display that showed they know about the current popularity of cupcakes. In addition to the cookbooks and standard muffin pans, they had a pretty neat Ice Cream Cone Cupcake Pan. The cake looks like a cone. The frosting takes the place of ice cream.



Rather than cupcakes that just look like ice cream cones, some people will be celebrating summer with cupcakes that are mini ice cream cakes. You can make your own or buy some at a place called MaggieMoo's that I will have to try sometime when I'm out at Turkey Creek. The ladies at Cupcakes Take the Cake taste tested a brand called PhillySwirl that is available at Sam's Club. I agree with their assessment that these seem to stretch the limits of what we call cupcakes. Not that it's a bad thing.

Ice cream cupcakes would be great but what we really need for this weekend are some graduation cupcakes. Or the time to make them.

rote-o-tiller

The librarian at my grammar school was a 90-year old Christian Brother. Once a week we would go to a religion class with him. He showed us ancient glass slides of religious art and taught us several short prayers. I think he called them either aspirations or invocations.

As an aside, I was looking for those prayers online and found some at on a webpage maintained by Father John the Carnival Priest. His site says, he's been "serving the needs of the outdoor amusement business industry since 1969!"

Anyhow, one of the prayers I memorized long ago came to mind while I was taking a walk around the neighborhood. You can see why I thought of the Prayer to Your Guardian Angel. Or should it be the Gardenin' Angel?

corpuscle crunch

Ben & Jerry's had their Free Cone Day and Baskin-Robbins had their 31 Cent Scoop Night last week. Today our local Bruster's offered free pints! Well, almost free. You had to donate a pint of blood to get the pint of ice cream.



My wife's blood is always in demand. She gets postcards and phone calls from Medic Regional Blood Center about all the blood drives in our area. She's a universal donor. I'm a universal recipient. How appropriate for our relationship.



We both gave blood and got ice cream and a t-shirt. Unfortunately they only had XL shirts. I only need a large. My wife had to go to choir practice so I took home her pint of Turtle and some Chocolate Oreo for myself. The girl at the window asked if I wanted a bag or a spoon. A spoon? C'mon! I don't wear XL shirts anymore.



My day started with some sad ice cream news. One of the first things I read this morning was the obituary of Irv Robbins, as in half of Baskin-Robbins. The Los Angeles Times had a link to test your flavor knowledge. For me, it was more like a reading comprehension quiz. I scored 100% because all the answers were in the articles I had just read.

not a spoonerism

What makes a place one of your "regular" restaurants? Do you have to go there once a week? Once a month? Once a year? I thought about that question yesterday when my wife and I saw that our regular Fuddruckers had closed. I wonder what they did with all the wall decorations.



We drove by it yesterday on our way home from Grandma's birthday party in Fairfax County, Virginia. The restaurant was in Salem, about halfway between our house and Northern Virginia. My wife and I could each get a salad and split a burger or a chicken sandwich while taking a break from the eight-hour road trip. I'm pretty sure I had been to the Salem Fuddruckers more often than the one near my house in Knoxville, which is still open.

behind the scenes

Fr. Augustine Idra brought home a special souvenir from the Papal Mass at Yankee Stadium. As one of the priests distributing the Eucharist, he received a commemorative stole.



I asked him about the safety video I had seen prior to the Mass. Fr. Gus said he was in the upper deck and did have to steady himself on a handrail. I wondered how they got the hosts from the altar to the far-reaching sections of the stadium in such a short time. The priests who were seen along the first and third base lines each held a ciborium full of hosts that were consecrated right there during the Mass. They served communion to people on the field and lower levels of the stadium. Fr. Gus got the hosts he served from a tabernacle that had been set up on the upper concourse in a specially decorated room. Several nuns stayed with the Blessed Sacrament in adoration. Those hosts had been consecrated the day before during Pope Benedict's Mass at St. Patrick's Cathedral.

Happy Ascension Thursday, I mean Sunday, by the way.

solid, liquid or gas?

Obviously the sign is supposed to say "Clean Smart." And it does. Yet every time I go past the new Middlebrook Station strip mall, I see something else. The letter M looks like an H to me. They must specialize in stain removal. From pants.

show some restraint

Thanks to an email reminder from my friend Bean, my family and I went to Baskin-Robbins after dinner tonight. It was their annual 31 Cent Scoop Night. While blogrolling this afternoon, I had also read a posting on Reality Me about the promotion. Just like last year there was a line out the door. A sign on that door warned customers of the ten scoop limit. Another sign advertised that they needed help. I was tempted to hop behind the counter and pitch in.



Back in my scooping days, we had to wear hats when working at Baskin-Robbins. Tonight, an employee in a red shirt kept touching her long hair after bending over to scoop out some ice cream. The lower she had to reach for the ice cream, the closer her hair got to the tubs. My wife said that she didn't want this girl to serve us. When it was our turn, I told the girl that we needed another minute to decide. She moved on to the next customer and we were helped by a guy with short hair.



I saw several people with multiple scoops including a guy who showed me his five. I only got a single scoop of Chocolate Mousse Royale, which was all I needed. As good as it was, I realized that I have lost my ice cream jones. When I first moved to Knoxville, I would eat ice cream almost every night. That's part of the reason I gained the weight that I lost a couple of years ago. I still love sweets but if I had to choose between ice cream and cake, I think I would take the cake. Or the cookie or the brownie or some candy.

underdogwood

A family errand kept me from napping yesterday. I was very tired and almost didn't bother going to see the Dogwood Arts Festival Parade. Besides, the parade is usually televised, right? Well, not this year but more on that later. My trip downtown was made completely worthwhile when I saw a certain gigantic nose rounding the corner onto Gay Street (not a euphemism).



Right there, behind The Andy Griffith Show Rerun Watchers Club was a copy of my favorite parade balloon ever. What a surprise! Not plane nor bird nor even frog. It was none other than Underdog!



When the a bad weather forecast caused the rescheduling of the parade to last night, it pushed the event into the May television sweeps period. WVLT couldn't clear the inventory to broadcast the parade. They aired their regularly scheduled programming instead. Only Dino Cartwright, the station's promotion director, was there to announce the parade entries as they passed the reviewing stand. The April 11th parade was supposed to last an hour. Tonight's event was over in half that time. I suspect that several groups couldn't make it on the new date. The News Sentinel says that only four of the ten originally scheduled bands showed up.

Across the street from where I was, Brittany Bailey from WBIR was operating her own small camera. I guess her report on the parade is an example of the "one-man band" or "backpack journalism" we've been hearing about.

By definition a parade means road closures. My wife needed to get to the Tennessee Theatre for the second performance of the Berlioz Requiem. My son and I rode with her, which got us downtown early for the parade and the concert. Shortly after we found our spot along the parade route, a guy with a protest sign sat down next to us. He was protesting some judge over some issue related to somebody's divorce. He tried telling me about it but I couldn't make out most of what he was saying. It was like listening to Boomhauer. A festival official came over and told him that he couldn't be there. He replied "free speech." Unable to dispute that fundamental right, the parade marshal changed her tack. In rapid succession she told him that the parade wouldn't be televised, that the specific judge wouldn't be there, that it was an event for children and that this wasn't the appropriate place for his protest sign. He correctly replied that it was a public space. They left him alone after that.

Underdog wasn't the only balloon in the parade. Like last year, there was a big pink dogwood blossom. Curious George got a hole in his hand from dragging his knuckles on the street. A wind gust blew him very close to my camera which left me with a weird shot of his mouth.

short-term solution

A baby bird celebrated Earth Day by falling to it at our house. It wasn't exactly an Opie and Andy moment, but my son and I decided to return the little tweeter to its nest. He got his lawn mowing gloves and a step ladder while I grabbed the camera.

disturb the sound of silence

After two days of watching CNN, I can't take it any longer. Pardon me while I borrow a formula from my friend Bean's blog, Strongly Worded Letter. Former radio deejay Tony Harris has the good looks to make it as a TV news anchor. He probably Googles himself regularly, therefore it shouldn't take him but a day or two to find this:

Dear Mr. Harris,

May I humbly suggest that you compare a tape of your coverage of today's Papal Mass with the coverage on EWTN, the Catholic network. Granted they have the advantage of already knowing the format of a standard Catholic service, however you will have to notice that you and your team were talking at the times they knew to be quiet and vice versa. More than once you chose to listen in to the proceedings at the wrong time. For example, your viewers heard a minute of silence after the homily and the Prayers of the Faithful read in multiple foreign languages. EWTN used those opportunities to explain what was happening. You completely obliterated the second reading, which was in English, and went to commercial during the Responsorial Psalm.

Furthermore, may I suggest that you spend some time listening to a good play-by-play announcer in your favorite sport. I can think of several baseball and football announcers who know how to be quiet and let the game happen. They may be in the middle of an anecdote about a player when then simply pause the story, let the game unfold and then pick up the story later. Unlike you, they do not spend 20 precious seconds explaining to the audience that they are about to stop talking to let us hear whatever it is that they are talking over.

Thank you for your attention,
Frank Murphy
Knoxville, TN

Now that we have that out of the way, let's move on to the photos my sister took at Nationals Park today. The Popemobile passed close by as she and my mother were walking to their seats. Once they got there, they had a pretty good view of the altar and of the Pope as he headed back to the dugout after Mass.

happy geburtstag

The ceremony to welcome Pope Benedict XVI to the White House was broadcast live on several TV networks this morning. I recorded two channels, hoping for the one in 13,500 chance that I might spot my daughter in the crowd. As you can see from the pictures taken by her boyfriend, they weren't too far back. She did say it was easier to see the Pope and the President when they were up on the balcony. She was pleasantly surprised to find that she happened be standing near our friend Fr. Ragan Schriver, the director of Catholic Charities of East Tennessee.



I chose to record EWTN for their complete coverage and CNN-HD for their high-definition picture. CNN was a disappointment. I wanted to see the White House in widescreen. Instead, they showed the ceremony in SD. On either side of the 4:3 image, they put pillars with the CNN-HD logo as if to rub it in. To make matters worse, anchor Tony Harris would not shut up. He must like hearing himself talk. Prior to the ceremony, he would restate his own question multiple times before letting his guest answer. Then he talked all the way through the Vatican anthem and part way through the Star Spangled Banner before realizing it and commenting on the fact that he was going to finally stop talking. It's no wonder that other bloggers have described him as "terrible" and "clueless."

As the newest U.S. Bishop, Knoxville native James Vann Johnston was chosen to read a question to the Pope at tonight's meeting at the National Shrine. EWTN carried the speech live. Bishop Johnston got his camera time at 7:15 p.m. The question was written by the USCCB and preselected by the pope as one he would like to answer. A local Missouri station only barely mentioned that their new bishop would be present. They also misspelled the word "speeches" and inserted a picture of Captain Kirk in the middle of the article.



Tomorrow I will record EWTN's coverage of the Papal Mass at Nationals Park. My mother and sister will be among the 46,000 in attendance. I don't expect to see them on camera. The Washington media have set up special pages on their websites for the Papal visit. Check out WRC, WUSA and WJLA as well as the Washington Post.

five years until Willard

Happy birthday Grandma! No, my grandmother doesn't usually read my blog but I once sent a link to my aunt, who printed the entry and gave it to Grandma.

Grandma turns 95 today. She was born one year after the Titanic sunk, 48 years after the day Lincoln died.

On her 14th birthday, the first footprints were left in the cement at Grauman's Chinese Theatre by Douglas Fairbanks, Mary Pickford and some others. On her 34th birthday, Jackie Robinson broke the color barrier in baseball.

Congress ratified Amendment XVI, which allowed them to collect an income tax, about two and a half months before Grandma was born. Her birthday didn't become the official Tax Day until she turned 42.

About nine years ago Grandma gave me a gift subscription to the statehood quarters. Every few months we get a panel in the mail from the Postal Commemorative Society. At the time, Grandma made me promise to continue buying the panels after she's gone. Fortunately for me, Grandma is still going strong and the final quarters will be released this year.

Grandma spent her 80th birthday with us in Los Angeles. We took her to the Chinese Theatre, to Beverly Hills and to the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences. That's where she saw the statues of some of her favorite stars, like Jack Benny.

hair slicked back, wayfarers on

This is my friend Brad. He makes me laugh.



As shown here, he's taking a quick break from filming a scene with his corn dog to inform us that "The Boys of Summerville" will have its premiere at the Regal Downtown West Cinema this Thursday at 7:00 p.m. Brad and the rest of the cast will make their red carpet arrivals starting at 5:30 p.m. He tells me that "Live at Five" plans to have a crew there.

The movie was filmed in East Tennessee last summer. Knoxville's Official Movie Star, David Keith, has a part in the film as well. I wonder if any longtime readers of this blog took advantage of the opportunity to be extras in the movie. I mean besides David.

hand in, handout

There are plenty of hair salons for women. Since my makeover, I get my hair cut at such a place every month. There's at least one local salon just for children. Mike Huff, the co-owner of Kidz Fun Kutz is now opening a hair salon for men, admittedly inspired by Hooters. He has taken some heat in the blogosphere for hiring only pretty women. In my opinion, the all-female staff members who I see at Garde Bien are just as attractive as the women at Gentlemen's Top Cuts.

Mike said that he chose a location on Middlebrook Pike because the rent was more affordable than on Kingston Pike. The site has a high traffic count and is not far from Knoxville's population center at Cedar Bluff. Gentlemen's Top Cuts will be the first business to open in a mini-mall that will also be home to Nixon's Deli, a nail salon and Domino's Pizza. A fifth storefront is still available.

With the salon due to open Wednesday, there's still lots of work to be done. Yet construction was temporarily halted so some bloggers could get a preview of the services to be offered. I was invited because of a post I wrote back in December. The guys who write SayUncle, Modern Redneck and Reality Me were also there. Publicist Zane Hagy told me that he is having great success getting bloggers to spread the word about his various clients.

Doug of Reality Me preceded me by several years as a member of Einstein Simplified. Today he channeled Steve Carell in "The 40-Year-Old Virgin" as he had some personal waxing done. He made sure we could all hear him scream although I suspect it may have been exaggerated for our benefit.

Like the other bloggers, I was offered a free haircut. I declined because I already have an appointment at Garde Bien scheduled for next week and because I didn't want to cheat on Stacey, my regular stylist. Zane said that my son could take advantage of the freebie instead. While Carrie cut my son's hair, I got a manicure from Michele. She cut my fingernails and then had me dip my hands in hot paraffin. After that she bagged my hands like evidence and told me to wait a few minutes. When Michele peeled off the wax, I could only think of Dr. Bill Bass. He had described the process of degloving in our interview about the book "Flesh and Bone." The skin sloughs off the hands of a corpse. It can later be retrieved, mixed with water and Downy and used to get the fingerprints of the deceased.

have a nice drey

Here's an idea for a t-shirt. My family went to the Tidal Basin and all I got was this dead squirrel picture:



On Friday, my wife and kids went to look at the cherry blossoms in Washington D.C. With camera in hand, they searched for the same group of trees where they had posed when the kids were little. One of the trees they found had a large knot hole. The kids noticed that there was a squirrel in the hole and that it was "resting." My son figured out that its rest was permanent. Then my wife decided to take a picture of it for me and for my blog. After all, I've had plenty of experience with dead critters in the pool. Or it's possible that she may have been inspired by a book. She's currently in the middle of the first Jefferson Bass novel, "Carved in Bone."

polymath on the Potomac

The cherry blossoms are peaking in Washington, DC this week. My wife and kids took some time during their Spring break to visit the monuments on Friday, the day before all the crowds showed up for the National Cherry Blossom Festival. My brother-in-law was also there and took this picture of the Jefferson Memorial that is absolutely postcard-perfect.



The Jefferson has always been my favorite memorial. There's something about its location and its architecture that speaks to me. I was surprised to learn yesterday that it's design was completed by a committee after the original architect died. I happened across a show on the Smithsonian Channel about the various memorials in and around D.C. They also said that when the Jefferson Memorial opened, on the third president's 200th birthday, bronze was too expensive. They used a plaster statue painted to look like bronze. After the war ended, a real bronze statue was installed. Nobody knows what happened to the plaster original. It's got to be in somebody's garage somewhere.

where to stick it

Campaign buttons used to be free. When I was a kid, I would occasionally stop by the local Republican and Democratic headquarters to pick up a few pins for my collection. My interest waned as I grew older and came to realize that I would never have a complete set. The buttons I did collect are in a big jar at my mother's house. If I had stuck with it, I might be like Ken Gustafson of Yakima or Graylen Becker of Rochester whose collections got them in their local newspapers. Or like Jordan Wright, who wrote a book about his political memorabilia.

I saw two things at Weigel's that surprised me this morning. One, that campaign buttons and bumper stickers were available for $1.99 each. That's at least $2 more than they're worth. And two, that some candidates who had dropped out were still represented. If I were so inclined, I could have bought a Giuliani or Edwards button or a Huckabee sticker. To prove that these pictures aren't from January, I posed hostage-style with today's News Sentinel.

with two you get eggroll

The White House may have had the Jonas Brothers perform today but we have our own Easter Monday tradition here on the blog. Last year and the year before, I showed off our family's decorated eggs. This year we take a look at how my son makes his annual Earth Egg. Using regular Paas dyes, he soaks one in blue until it reaches the desired hue. Then he uses a Q-tips cotton swab and a glass of water to erase the dye from the land masses. He dips another swab in green dye and paints on the continents. Obviously the North and South Poles are left white.



My son was happy with the way his Asia turned out. Below, he's displaying India for the camera. The finished product takes its place among the rest of our 2008 Spring collection, with Europe and Africa visible. Last year we showed you the Western Hemisphere before it got peeled and eaten.

for peeps' sake

The amount of publicity that Marshmallow Peeps receive every Easter is mind boggling. Most of it seems to be fan-generated rather than coming from the company's press releases. As a lifelong Peeps lover myself, I can honestly say that I was a big fan before it was cool. For example, I once brought a package of purple Peeps to a glacier near Mt. McKinley in Alaska.



The Peeps will be featured tomorrow on CBS News Sunday Morning. Rita Braver's report will include a film I told you about in April 2007 and an artist that I told you about in March of last year.

Mary Constantine of the Knoxville News Sentinel posted a video showing how to use Peeps and chocolate chips to decorate a Peeps Sunflower Cake.

Meanwhile in Washington, the WMATA is using Peeps to get baseball fans to ride the Metro to the new Nationals Park.

Speaking of DC, the Washington Post got some tremendous entries in their second annual diorama contest. Out in Washington State, the readers of the Seattle Times created some great Peeps art.

When I showed my wife a cute picture of a Peeps costume for toddlers, she honestly asked if it came in my size.

When my daughter celebrates Easter tomorrow, she'll have a care package that my wife mailed to her. It contain some of the brand new Peeps Tulips.



A New Jersey columnist writes that he can't eat just one Peep. Can't say that I blame him.

unflattering imitation

Like Jimmy Durante used to say, "everybody wants to get into the act." Since Marshmallow Peeps are the top selling non-chocolate Easter candy, it makes sense that other companies want to compete. I'll cover the copycats today and save the real deal for tomorrow.

A while back I wrote about a similar Christmas candy called Marshmallow Pals. They are also made in an Easter version. I saw more sugar coated marshmallow things at Wal-Mart this week. Palmer now makes a Marshmallow Baby Binks in addition to their chocolate bunny with the same name.



Nestled among the Peeps, I spotted some animal-shaped marshmallows made by Barton's Candy. Their Barn Yard Buddies looked more like Barn Yard Blobbies to me.The creatures pictured below are supposed to be cows, pigs and frogs.



The odd shapes reminded me of an old Bob & Ray bit about a warehouse that stored its chocolate Easter rabbits too close to some steam pipes. My radio idols did a fake commercial for Chocolate Wobblies. Each one was guaranteed to have a ribbon hidden somewhere inside it.

all ears

The members of my extended family are planning and preparing for my grandmother's big birthday celebration this Spring. One of my cousins volunteered to assemble a DVD with pictures of Grandma throughout the years. I spent this afternoon going through photo albums and scanning images that I could email to him. In addition to a bunch of snapshots of Grandma sightseeing in Hollywood, I found two old photos that were solely for my own amusement.

When we lived in Virginia, we often visited Grandma on Long Island for the Fourth of July. I always enjoyed listening to WLNG while in the area. Whenever possible, I would seek out a Paul Sidney remote broadcast. Here we are at the Independence Day parade in Southampton, talking about radio on the radio.



Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey used to let deejays ride the elephants from the train to the venue in the various cities they visit. They don't anymore. When the circus was in town two weeks ago, I thought about the times that I was fortunate enough to have done so in the streets of Washington D.C.

sardines

There are a few random thoughts still in my notebook from Walt Disney World. I'll unload them here.

I noticed a lot of areas around the theme parks set aside for the Disney Vacation Club time share pitch. At each place, a lonely cast member stood by with brochures while a video screen played an infomercial. I'm thankful that they hadn't moved the sales presentations into the ride queues where they would alienate a captive audience. I'll bet that somebody suggested it in a meeting though.

While trying to find an easier way to get from the Magic Kingdom to Disney's Hollywood Studios, I saw a sign at the Transportation Center for buses headed to Shades of Green. Being unfamiliar with the concept, I asked a waiting lady what it meant. I was pleased to hear that it's a military hotel known as an Armed Forces Recreation Center.

The only flaw in an otherwise perfect vacation was the long wait for Disney Transport. One of the other people at our convention thought that higher gas prices may have forced Disney to cut back on the frequency of the buses that take guests from the hotel to the theme parks and back. While we waited for a bus to Epcot, we saw at least three buses going to the Magic Kingdom. The next day when we were going to the Magic Kingdom, we saw at least three buses going to Epcot. Each time we waited over half an hour for our bus. Once we got one, it was packed full of passengers.

the good, the bad and the ugly

While at Walt Disney World this weekend, my wife and I tried to visit some attractions we didn't see last year. We got home last night but the blog posts about the trip continue.

My wife was interested in the Test Track ride at Epcot. We saved a lot of time by using the single riders line. As long as you don't mind riding in separate cars, it's better than waiting in the long regular line. Because a light rain had started to fall, they made several announcements that the ride might have to close at any time. Since our line was moving fast, we didn't miss out.

When we went to the Magic Kingdom, I wanted to ride the Carousel of Progress, which was originally part of the 1964 World's Fair. The voice of the audio-animatronic father seemed familiar to me. It was Jean Shepherd, who I remember from childhood as a great storyteller on WOR-AM. Most people know his voice from "A Christmas Story." Last night my wife was complaining that the song "There's a Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow" was stuck in her head. As much as I wanted to enjoy it, I had trouble keeping my eyes open during the show.

Two years ago I went on a face character photo safari. Instead of Disney princesses, this year I saw Lady Tremaine, Anastasia and Drizella. They seem to have a lot more fun teasing the guests than Cinderella ever could.